freshideas
Curiousity - Subscribe
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freshideas
Curiousity - Subscribe
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| A friend Omi said hi to me and asked me if I know Erika. I said yes, yet when I asked him what's up on us three, he wouldn't answer. Whatever that is, I want to know. Honestly, I just love myself I don't want to let them mess up well-cherished connections. |
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freshideas
Self-sacrifice Nov 18th, 2009 1:54:09 am - Subscribe
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In the bus a while ago, I had the chance to remember the value of non-self-sacrifice in order to love oneself first before everybody else. I was standing inside the moving bus as a passenger, waiting for any seat to be vacated, when, near me, a passenger left his seat and headed towards the bus door to leave. By instinct, I got the seat for myself. Yet before I sit, I saw a man with a bag on his shoulder, and told myself, "Maybe this man works here. i don't work, so maybe he needs to sit." It took me some time to think first about it. Then I made my decision. I left my seat and gave it to the man. I, alone, stood back hanging my hand on the hand grills. After that, I felt ashamed. Why did I do that? Is it reasonable for me to do it because I judged the man by my own measure? As I felt embarrassed, I told myself, maybe I was expecting something from him. By judging him by his works, I sacrificed my own right to sit on a passenger seat. As that happened, I decided not to look back, and take not the credit of receiving any attention from him. "Don't look back," was the words I remembered, words that came from a friend. So I did not mind my sacrifice. I lost me. I lost my convenience. So, is it love? When I got home, my father had to fill the emptiness inside me by giving me food, which I ate. I just thought there was wrong. Or maybe, I did the right thing. Perhaps. I don't know. |
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freshideas
Application Jun 22nd, 2009 11:41:37 pm - Subscribe
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| I am applying for a number of non-government organizations and financial institutions, names of which I will not disclosed for now. Hopefully, I may be admitted. |
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freshideas
It's over May 21st, 2009 8:03:40 pm - Subscribe
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| My final undergraduate exam is over. No regrets. |
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freshideas
Tap on the shoulder May 19th, 2009 12:29:31 pm - Subscribe
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Despite the effects of inevitable exposure to desktop radiation due to my need to accomplish a couple of reaction papers and a research paper, I try to respect my universe and others' universe. Things like turning off the electric fan inside my neighbor-dorm mate Jhups's room, which is supposed to dry up his socks for tomorrow's use, thinking that letting the fan turned on overnight is a waste of energy, makes me scary of myself because I tend to mind other people's business based on my own judgment, (and what's worse is that I act on them immediately without consultation). The point is, for no reason, I just disturbed the peace of one's soul. And I'll try not to do that again. Things to learn from this moment, and from two others: On the electric (fan) sock dryer: Before you think that others are wasting energy and harming the environment, you should watch over your habit first. On taking math exams When feeling lost (of the happenings of the world), at least be able to ask one person about one deadline of one important task than can affect your life. On having a good sleep Finish what you ought to finish for today. Let tomorrow take care of itself. |
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freshideas
Pierces Apr 11th, 2009 10:17:26 pm - Subscribe
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I was reading past emails which I should have been to, but I didn't. A friend comments, "Everybody knows that you'd break your neck to hold your chin up." A dorm mate sings "A Power of Two", saying "Cause I've seen the shadows of many people Trying on the treasures of youth But a road that fancy and fast Ends in a fatal crash To tell you the truth." |
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freshideas
Distracted again Apr 1st, 2009 7:11:55 pm - Subscribe
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Riding on a bus, I came back home in Manila hoping that the dawn will shine upon me, after a long series of unfortunate events, tragedies that plagued my understanding of myself that concerns my academic life, my relationships, and the friendships that I build for four years. I hope that there is one more chance on earth that I can be. I will search for that. I always wanted to do a lot of things, and I realized that it only goes through my head. Sometimes I would think I want to be somebody like Matanglawin Kim Atienza, who was able to share his love for nature through his weekend TV program. I love sharing ideas and concepts to other people, trying to be wholesome, because I think there are so much things in my head that I can not contain. I remember the time when my cousin Kat told me one dull afternoon in the house that indeed, I am an intellectual person, someone who always asks where most of the time, the questions are not that important, but still I ask, so that even my words do not complement with the emotional attachment each supposes to have when spoken of. I have a low emotional quotient. Or do I really have? I know I am a very personal person, someone who can't laugh in front of a huge crowd like in fast foods and malls, fearing that the people around me would be distracted and would stare at me with rage, so that when I talk to someone, I see to it that our distance is close enough so that we can hear each other, as if the line of communication is well-protected in between our arms. That way, while no other person can clearly hear our conversation, no one will never understand us, and will decide not to butt in. I hesitate to write as many words as I can write, thinking that people will treat me as somebody who is special. I don't wanna elaborate more about that. Perhaps soon. |
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Hello Aeonity World, I stepped aside from here for a while because of the way I was using this blog, who was privileged to the information within it, and the way I felt about it considering the timeline of baggage that it dragged behind it. I can't say for sure that there will be a definite return to this forum for my thoughts, fears and writing. But something must happen soon. Because I've got to approach the old suitcase, and I'm either going to unbuckle the clasps and sift through the memories for keepers, or I'm going to have to give it up entirely. We'll see what happens shall we? Tron |