rogue window washer
Date: Jul 23rd, 2005 5:14:26 am - Subscribe
Mood: tearful
there is a small shopping complex that houses about 7 stores adjacent to where i live. after ripping through the fridge, i hopped to the car and took off for 7/11. as usual, it was a ghost town outside. i roll out, and toss my usual nod to the row of stores along the road. in the dark, my eye caught up to a man standing along one of the business windows. i squinted to see him in the faint security lighting of the parking area.
he held a a faint tool in his hand that he was wielding like a sword. i leaned over, slowing. i think to myself...is this place about to be robbed? i had barely finished that thought when he came out into a well lit section. this mother fucker was washing windows. at MIDNIGHT. minutes of deep confusion came over me. i entered 7/11 and 3 people deep on the line - it still made no sense.
but i won 10 dollars on a lottery ticket.
i've torn back into my somerset maugham short story collections. these are priceless works. his observations of character through virtual strangers are fantastic and absorbing.
really, nudists need to be stopped. these people scare me, deeply. i understand that the feeling of being without clothes is supposed to be liberating and return many to a childlike happiness.
well, i get the same experience from mushrooms. let me highlight the ways in which my method is better.
1> mushrooms don't get you and your privates burnt to a crisp from the sun.
2> some people don't like the fucking beach.
if you're a nudist - that's your only choice - to be at the beach.
3> sand gets inside the vagina. see above about beach.
4> why do i have to do the congo line if i'm naked? i have NEVER once done the congo line for FUN.
5> ever wondered why beach volleyball is in every single nudist picture? here's a clue - breasts bounce. nudists - stop the lying, its about sex too.
6> mushrooms don't include pedophiles peeping everyone's kids from over the sand dune.
7> sorry, still don't want to see an 80 year old man's penis. i know i won't notice. oh wait, yes i will.
BUT - let me be fair.
i have thought of one reason to be a nudist...and this relates to being earth friendly.
1> no reason to slaughter trees for toilet paper when the beach is a gigantic kitty litterbox.
Comments: (2)
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Content Copyrighted _kermie_ at Aeonity Blog
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hushpuppy - July 23rd, 2005 |
About the naked beach and being barenaked in public, I think it depends on each individual to decide if they want to go to the place and get naked or not, but to me, I don't think I'd feel very comfortable to be stared at by total strangers 
Well, that's just my opinion. _kermie_ - July 23rd, 2005 |
