[I blame Me]

Dec 11th, 2006 6:48:21 pm - Subscribe
Mood: Grow with~~~

Perhaps attraction is not as fatal as it seems; the momentus mood of you and I has faded. Moving on without hope that we can once again be. I hope someday I can find peace with myself about what happened between you and I; or what you did to me. Hate surfaces so easily; sabotage seeps from my skin when I hear your name or things that remind me of you. Deep down, I know that this sabotage is because of the love that I once had, but can have no more. The one that holds your hand this moment in time... is she the one or is she another passerby? I don't pretend to have left a mark; as I know I could never leave a mark on you. Unfortunately, you have left a mark that can not be removed. Deadly...........

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[Best of Both Worlds]

Dec 7th, 2006 2:39:58 pm - Subscribe
Mood: Ancient History~~

I don't blame you, I would also want the same... If I had the choice to choose between two people, I would be a very happy person as well... Unless I love them both in equal amounts; but that can't be the case, I don't believe that you can love anyone in equal amounts at any given time! One is loved more than the other..... and that's a fact... anything is just an excuse to pass time by to try and get more out of the both of you.

If you wish to marry me.. does that mean that you love me more than you love her? How can I believe that when there is no evidence....... Words..... they only mean something when action is taken to follow it up. Otherwise... they are just muffles that how no existence or meaning!

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[I see the Moon~~ But the Moon doesn't see Me]

Dec 6th, 2006 6:26:39 pm - Subscribe
Mood: Selfish~~Love

I suppose I can't hide the fact that I am falling very deeply in love with you. I suppose, you don't want to hide the fact that you can get away with the situation clean and easily!

Am I willing to let you get away with this? Do I want your happiness over my own? Constantly asking myself these questions, but constantly getting nowhere in the process. Why can't you see that age doesn't matter? That..... looks don't mean a thing to me, and that I would give up most of myeverything to be with you. I don't care if people don't approve of our age gap, I don't care if you don't think you're not good enough for me.

I sometimes think, are these excuses or are they genuine reasons... because you really care for me... you don't want me to get hurt in anyway. I would like to believe this a lot... but I also know that love is a selfish thing, and that everyone wants what every other person would want.

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[Why Tell Me That?]

Dec 4th, 2006 6:42:17 pm - Subscribe
Mood: The Gap~~

Why tell me that when you say that if you're gonna use the word 'WERE'~~~??? Why?? As I told you earlier, should I be happy or sad about this situation? You've rejected marriage with others, but would marry me.................... I suppose you don't know how these words have drilled a big hole in my heart? Happiness likes to play tricks on people, as it has never tasted the bitterness of having such knowledge.

They say that knowledge can kill, and it is true... as my heart has just died. I am not the only one, I know.. and I wish I could find another outlet where my constant whinning can be spectated by others. Unfortunately, no one can completely understand my words. As I am often mistaken for my words on this blog as I am anywhere else. I suppose, it is my problem; as I can't express myself in a way in which everyone would understand. But, at least...... I can boast that I understand myself.

What I want.... is not what I can get... what he wants, he will not take........

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[Inspection]

Dec 3rd, 2006 11:13:41 am - Subscribe
Mood: Allergic to Humans

How do we really know if a someone is truely telling the truth about their feelings? Do we have to know the person well enough to read them like an open book? Or is there an art form that we can learn?

A very intellegent friend said to me that humans are very stupid beings; through all the advances in science and technology, we still choose to believe in religion, ghosts and fate. He can't understand..... but I also can't understand him. He is a selfish being with no contemplation on how others will feel or how they will react to his words. Although I agree, that through all the science and technology we are very ignorant beings. But needless to say, he can sort to respect ones views despite his own beliefs!

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