[Intolerance Factor]

Nov 30th, 2006 6:03:40 am - Subscribe
Mood: Carry On~~~

Can you ever trust a man that cheated on his girlfriend to be with you? If he cheated on her, then what's there to say that he won't do the same to you?

This is the intolerance factor that I am talking about... Fine, this man is now with you, but can you trust him? Can you have a healthy relationship with both of you knowing that it began with such a flaw? A flaw that won't ever go away, and that will be constantly at the back of your mind. We keep saying that being naive is stupidity and we frown upon it; but is it stupidity or intellegence? The best gift given, is forgetting the pain that you once felt could destroy you. We erase this pain by getting something to replace it.

I can't let him get away with it... I can't let him just say one thing to me and then sleep with her! To let him get away with it would be the best thing that he's ever had... so, despite the fact that I love him.... It can not go on this way

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[No Matter How Sweet.... It will Never Belong to Me]

Nov 29th, 2006 6:05:42 am - Subscribe
Mood: Intolerance of the Heart~~~

No matter how sweet we are, or what you say to me.... You will never belong to me completely. I feel 'half' bad..... I can't justify this but it's because maybe that I met you first; but cirumstances compelled us apart. But, surely it is not right for anything to happen between us when you're with someone else at the moment.

This woman, whom you've been with now for 5 years....... surely I ask myself, there must be more remorse than what you have shown about betraying her! You know you have a special place in my heart and that I will always somehow belong to you, no matter who I might be with. But the past week.... has made me wonder and fear that we have crossed the line a bit too far. We now know that we can't seem to seperate once we have had a taste of the bitter sweetness. Where do we go from here?! Forever is not possible.....

Can I be so selfish? What would you be willing to do for me? Can you bare the thought to the leave the woman that you have been with for 5 years?

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[Betrayal]

Nov 22nd, 2006 11:21:16 am - Subscribe
Mood: Poetically Distraught~~~

Can you really make someone do something if they're not willing to do? I do feel extremely worried and pained by this meeting/trip. I don't quite know how to classify our relationship under such circumstances. I feel so sorry for her; if I was her, what would I do? Would I go completely insane and come over there to drag you back or hurt you physically? Or would I just leave it and not mention it at all? Would I love a man so much or be afraid to lose him so much to let him see another woman behind my back (with me knowing), and me not uttering a word of anger to him?

The answer is..... yes... I had found that man... but I have also lost him

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[Ace of Hearts Vs Ace of Spades]

Nov 20th, 2006 10:18:01 am - Subscribe
Mood: High Hand~~~

Something Old:

I am in Hong Kong right now, and living with a very good friend of mine. I know she's very unhappy and know that she feels alone most of the time; so I thought I'd venture out to see her (and also do a spot of shopping while I'm at it!!).

Ialso met up with a very old friend today, and he told me that he was having some heart problems and is quite unwell. Associations with heart problems: the older generation (not being rude or anything). Once I heard this I was really concerned with his well being. But I couldn't help but think about how long I've known him for. It has now been 7, maybe 8 years at least. Suddenly I felt very old and tired myself too. But somehow a trival joke was made on how seeing me has made him feel a lot better (which means, he can't be that sick!! haha)

Something New:

I found out today... that he's now seeing someone else. It's actually not new, news; I think I knew it from the very beginning, but was in complete and utter denial with it. I wanted to believe that he was hurting as much as I am, that he now regret's every moment of pain he's caused me. But, unfortunately... reality has hit rock bottom...........

Something Borrowed:

I need to borrow a young person's heart again; just to know what it will feel's like once again to be completely free and naive. I know, I know... just because you are young, it doesn't mean that you haven't been through a lot! What I mean is.... there is still large amounts of hope that something or someone will come along and make it all better for you; or thinking that there's alway's a better tomorrow. I need to borrow this glimpse..... who want's to play trade?

Something Blue:

I wish I was blue; then maybe I would be able to forget about feeling's and just maintain the animal instincts that god intended for me. We are machine's of recreation; we survive... but only under circumstances and certain conditions. Human's are fragile and weak.... tell me... why can't we just show the instincts that we were given? I want to be the heartless loser that I was intended to be.... without a heart... you can feel no pain!

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[You will Travel to far places Without me]

Nov 5th, 2006 5:09:02 pm - Subscribe
Mood: It does not beckon me~~

The carriage that awaits me is just a pumpkin carriage.... fate is cruel. Cinderella... oh Cinderella; you are so fortunate to have his love. I await in the pumpkin carriage, until it turns back into its real form. Leaving me behind is nothing unusual.... The milkyway beckons you.

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