alone's Blog

Inner battles
Date: Apr 19th, 2006 3:18:29 am - Subscribe
Mood: stimulated


It took me a bit to long to realise that sure he acts like a player, such he acts all puffheady but inside hes just a good kid.

AND?

And I feel like a bum.

HE LIED TO YOU. HE CHEATED ON YOU.

And that matters why?

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

I am saying nothing. I dont love him. I dont love him. I dont love him.

STOP LYING TO YOURSELF WOWAN.

I am not. Ok maybe a little. Ok maybe a lot.

SO YOU DO LOVE HIM?

Maybe but that shouldnt matter.

WHY NOT

Because it just shouldnt I hate him.

YOUR INCAPABLE OF HATING.

So I cant hate or love or be loved, I can only be hated.

YOU CAN ALSO LAUGH AND CRY.

I am scared.

OF?

Disturbing the balance.

NO MORE TALKING TO TOM. YOU LOVE HIM. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?

Nothing.

OKAY. DONT LOOK BACK AT THIS AND SAY I WISH I'D DONE SOMETHING.

I wont.

SO YOUR OK WITH HIM GOING OUT WITH CHLOE?

Wtf? Who?

OH HES GOING OUT WITH THIS RED HEAD.

I dont care.

YOU DONT?

I do. I still love him but that doesnt matter.

SO YOUR OVER HIM?

No. I want him.
Comments: (3)

onlyway - April 19th, 2006 wow. wow, that was so intense. i think i saw a little of myself.

deathcab4u - April 19th, 2006 I still never fully understand what's going on with this! It's okay though, I still enjoy your posts and their honesty.

alone - April 20th, 2006 cabbiee sweetie..I dont understand myself either but yea its how i feel

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