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| Tomorrow's my last and final exam. Religion. Should be a breeze I guess, nothing much needed there but common sense. Anywho, it actually saddens me that tomorrow's the last day of my sophomore year. Seriously, I'll live all the downs from this year again if I could... just so I could go through the ups... If you get what I mean. So much to keep, yet so much to lose. At the start of the year, I promised to enjoy myself this year so that I'd have no regrets. And coming to the end, I guess I could say I did a fair job. Not an excellent one, mind you, but fair. If only I had more chances; opportunities to build on things and make things better. I really don't know how to take this; should I say that it's officially the end, no more chances? Or does summer have things in store for me? I hope it's the latter. I seriously do. I guess it's that single thing that's making me unhappy. I should be the happiest person in the world right now, but that one... no, maybe two things are holding me back from that fulfillment. Just... don't forget, alright? |
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Good day, overall. I enjoyed the new lesson in math regarding trigonometry... although I did get me off track here and there. Oh well, I found that fun. Then came Religion, which was the same as every other religion class - boring and tedious. Nothing special there, except for perhaps the sneaking a bite of some filipino cookies here and there when Mr. Galka wasn't looking. Music made my day. I forced Champion to make me part of the Spring Concert decorating committee. Well, it's not actually called the Spring Concert anymore, our theme's pretty cool - the mixed tape. Yeah man, my greatest contribution to such a theme was to classify the parts of the performances as "side a" and "side b". Get it? Mixed tape? Yeah it's pretty straight forward, you'd be stupid not to know. Played the intermediate concert songs to practice for tomorrow's festival. It was fun. Art came period four. And let's just say opportunities were available, but even if I wanted to I couldn't take them, because I was out of the class most of the time adding a soundtrack to my movie. Oh well, next time. It's funny how it still gets to me. And the fact that I have a substantial amount of control over how this ends up makes me feel stupid, because it's sort of like, if I don't want to deal with such problems, why don't I just take action for once? |
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So this mother's day is going to be completely useless... I would expect that the family go out to eat or something, but today's proving to be just like any other Sunday. Whatever, it's not like you can go out and celebrate when you have no money whatsoever to spend. I guess today's just going to be homework rush. Nothing else but catching up on homework... Yet, it's going to be a disconnected process because I know something's going to distract me and I'm going to end up doing the homework tomorrow anyways. My allergies are killing me. Seasonal, that is. Ever since the sixth grade... But man I thought I overcame them. I guess not. My eyes aren't as itchy, and my nose still lets air in and out, but it's still at a bad enough condition to make me want to kill myself. Okay, not kill myself, but along those lines. |
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Turns out I actually have a lot to do for homework this weekend... I haven't finished the Merchant of Venice questions, but I managed to get eleven done tonight. Still got two and a tenth of a page to go... then after that, the massive booklet of history to study for as well as an essay that I haven't even picked a topic for... this is great. But oh well, Mother's Day is tomorrow. So procrastination, once again? |
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I watched exactly that today. I wanted to see Iron Man, but once again Cineplex at Town proved to disappoint. I went with Alexa and my little sister. I personally liked it, although I expected it to be a bit more humorous. This was another one of those weekends where I completely didn't care about what I had for homework. I doubt I'll actually do it anyways. So, I'm still waiting for the opportunity to expand my social life. Didn't really come today, despite my high hopes... It's the weekend and unlike me, they probably have lives anyways. I have to talk to my cousin about the Starbucks gig. I hope he can get it for me... Maybe so, he has pretty high status in that company. I'm so bored, I want GTA already. But that cash prize... man I'm starting to think there isn't even one. But my teachers insisted that it's on its way, and they're pretty trustworthy so I guess I'll take their word for it. Things to look forward to... I guess Alexa's confirmation tomorrow. And even more so, the week coming up. Band on Tuesday, and it's a week of day one surplus. Hoorah! |
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Out of ten, I give today a seven. So I guess that's sort of more than just satisfactory, but that's beside the point. History was great. Absence of Howe is presence of relief. Let's just keep it at that. Careers in the library; watched Daddy Day Care. Awfully boring time. Science test. Didn't study, but I think I did pretty well. Manageable is the word. English was similar to history. Absence of Rendulich... well, I can't say I liked it because I'm cool with Rendulich now. It was cool to have a free period though. Good talks in period four. And came the highlight of my day, which was tennis. Preparing for my trek to the courts at my locker, I changed my clothes, then happened to pass by somebody significant. I am not disappointed at the lack of action taken during that time because I hardly consider passing someone in the halls while the person and yourself are busy socializing with a big group of other friends. Opportunity will come next week, or even this weekend perhaps? Anywho, tennis was pretty boring. I played against the juniors which was definitely not exciting because they all played tennis from natural ability and sucked like hell. Relief came when they let me play against the seniors who actually knew how to play. Sorry, but in order for me to enjoy playing the sport I need to face people who put up a fight. Stayed longer than expected at the courts... I'm going to say until five, five thirty? It was just Tran, Iyengar, Antilla and myself. Our game gradually diminished into laziness, as conversation took away our focus. Got hit in the head with Antilla's serve. Geez, can't a man tan his legs in peace? So anyways, we went back to the school to put back our gear. Front doors were locked so we had to go to the side... Iyengar's magically opened the locked doors with his asian powers. No literally, Antilla tried to open the door himself but it was locked, whereas all Iyengar did was slightly tug on the door handle. Magic! Hungry as hell, us four went to the Woodside McDonalds. I ordered a Big Mac with small coke. What the others ordered isn't that important, but getting closer and building friendships with them today was. What I did today with them three gives me hope for success in doing the same with other people. I just hope it turns out to be exactly that. |
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So I decided the purple/yellow background scheme was starting to get old. I tried some abstract on Photoshop, and it was all fine and dandy... but compared to my sister's it was pretty ugly. So I just used my sister's. Hope it's eye-catching. 
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I'm pretty stupid. Mainly because I keep telling myself to make the best out of the limited time I have; to just go for it and do whatever it takes to build the friendship. Perfect opportunity hit today. An hour and a half I had. That's more than enough time to just catch up and build on things. Yet, despite the few exchanged words, I know I could have done so much more. What was done today could hardly be classified as satisfactory. So, why was it that as soon as the opportunity came, I instantly had the mindset of surrender. Perhaps it's because I'm sick of it always being me to work in this friendship. I'm sick of waiting around; of the lack of presence by the other side. Yet, deep down, I still want this to work out. I want to make the friendship strong enough to withstand even after this school year, and not so that it dies once this year ends. From now on, I promise not to quit and to just go for it. And seriously, I'm keeping to this promise this time around. |
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Alright, so this editorial was assigned what, two weeks ago? And an extension was given. I evidently didn't use that extra time wisely. Why is it though, that everytime I come to write this editorial, I have the opinions ready but I just don't know how to word them in effective sentences? So, loco parentis. Sure, that's a fun topic to talk about... I know that I'm against it, I guess. And I also know my reasons why - multiculturalism, variations among family structures, changing values which conflict with traditional ones... So now, how do I put these reasons into sentences that will sound smart and attractive? And it's not even that I'm distracted, because I've spent over two hours now organizing my ideas and attempting intelligent literary assembly. Mind you, this was away from the computer, from the PS3, from msn, facebook, music... whatever. I really did try to focus, and it did nothing for me. So perhaps writing in this blog will help me clear my mind even further; to make room for new ideas to fill it. But see, getting ideas isn't the problem, it's expressing them. Probably the most that can distract me right now is my thoughts on my current social life. Yeah, the disappointment from today pops into my head once and a while, but it's not a large enough interference to derail me completely. So maybe it's just that I'm not getting the flow today, or right now... and I just need a bit more time. Alright, let's try this again. Back to english! |
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Today was a really good day, despite the fact that I didn't get to take advantage of the late start. But yes, although waking up late I still made my bus, as well as fit in enough time to go to McDonalds for breakfast. Going to the festival at St. Basil's saved my life. Day two is my difficult day, and the festival saved me from attending the boring classes of the day. Played pretty well in fact! All Blues sounded soothing, which is unusual considering the crap that we usually produce during rehearsal. Sesame Street had a few minor errors here and there, but it was manageable. Bus ride back was fun. Making plans with people to skip third period. And we did. I went back to McDonalds with friends to get McFlurries and we chilled for an hour until fourth. Then fourth we just watched a movie. Well, that's basically what we did. So my day was a mix of new and old. But a good mix. Except for two things... One, gifted testing results. I missed by 5 points! Requirement to make it was 128 points, so my score is... well do the math. It's okay though, I'm content with being defined as an average student. What did piss me off most was something on a more social note. I've mentioned a couple of entries back about wanting to build a friendship with a certain someone. Having the opportunity to do exactly that today and not taking it... well it pissed me off that I didn't! Way less than two months to go. How am I going to realize my goals if I don't take action myself? |
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I'm immature sometimes too. But not as frequently as you, nor to the extent that you remain in such a state. I know when to draw the line, whereas all you ever do is cross it. Well that is, in my eyes. It's funny how going through this year changed a whole lot of me. Perhaps its because I've been hanging out with the older kids lately, but I've never come to realize just how annoying you can really get.. until now. Okay, so maybe I noticed it even from when I met you. But at the time, I didn't really care because I acted immature too. I guess now that I've sort of drifted away from you guys I see it all in a different light. Let's analyze the steps I took to get to my level of maturity. Started off the year with Linda, so you could already imagine how publicly stupid I was (sorry Linda!). Then came you guys, and at first I thought you were cool... Then I recognized your constant need to be the center of attention and fake actions to try to fit the mould. And although I can name many examples of this, four out of them probably stand out the most - your abrupt questioning of something completely irrelevant to a topic being conversed about in a conversation, your yelling out of other people's secrets so that people will laugh with you, your apparently new addiction to piercings, and your "stealing my thunder", well, as it seems, by going to the place where I'm going for my birthday even though you obviously have no knowledge or background of the contents of such an event. So let me ask you: are you doing this for image? Because it's quite immature and annoying. You really don't have to act differently just to get attention. Perhaps these actions are the at the very root of who you are, and if so, I guess we're completely polar from each other. Then again, just as there's a limit to immaturity, there's also a limit to maturity. I should also learn when to let go and not be so serious. But really now, if you keep acting to impress, I don't know if hanging out with a wannabe is in my best interests. |
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Change of song. Obviously, TBS could represent every single thing I feel at the moment, but I felt a need to transition to a softer, r&b sort of sound. This song practically represents what I've been trying to do the entire year. All I really wanted to do was... be close. Jon McLaughlin's "So Close" could fit in this category as well, but I used that before already! So, I'm going to let Avant's "Wanna Be Close" remind me of what I want now and for my future endeavours with those special to me. |
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Alright, so after a few days break from the PS3, coming back wasn't so exciting anymore. CoD4 isn't as much fun without friends to play with, sort of like how it's sort of useless for me to publish blogs without having friends to relate to them. Well, in my case this is so, because I know a lot of people who actually write journal entries on the web for personal reasons. But back on point... GTA4! How I ache to have you in my possession... yet my lack of sufficient dolla's makes this a difficult to realize. Seriously, the school board's taking their sweet time sending me my prize money. Come on man, I worked long hours composing that poem!.. Alright I didn't, but still, I wish they would hurry up already. I'm starting to think it's all false hope, what I'm feeling. Then again, I have been slacking off way too much in school. And getting a game such as GTA4 would throw me even more off track. I still want it though. My Charles Darwin Theory of Evolution paper proved that I can still get good marks if I just balance my school work and leisure properly. So if I do get this game, I know that I can't promise I'll work harder in school 'cause I know the game will prevent me from doing so. Still, CoD4 is a ghost town. It's so sad. Obviously, it's still a fun game... but leveling up and getting better at the game doesn't give as much feeling of success as beating friends rankings. From this point, moving up the ranks wouldn't be such an accomplishment due to my friends lack of presence in the game; thus their idle rankings. |
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Math in the morning... quiz wasn't bad. Religion for two hours, but all I had to do was colour my children's book... and we had some assembly that didn't thrill me as much. Music after. Played the songs for intermediate AND senior concert bands! Finally, Champion doesn't waste the whole class talking about random things. Art class... drawing hands and feet with comte crayon... Got five hands done. They look retarded, probably because I wasn't focusing. Thanks Ivy. Skipped band and went to tennis. Serve got way better! Still got to work on the ground strokes. So all in all, good day. Went by more quickly than I thought it would... and I didn't see the face I always hope to see... Oh well, maybe tomorrow will prove better. Damn, May's-a-movin'. And I don't want it to. So much for two months left... it's more like, a few weeks left now. I wish they brought back the thirteenth grade (yeah, I said it). Anyways, things to look forward to: May 8, cousin's come back from Vegas... and I can talk about getting my long-awaited job. SJMP ISA Night? Intermediate Concert at Don Bosco... And lastly but just as important... Reviving a seemingly vanished friendship. |
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I guess this is my new journal/diary/blog. There are too many people on Livejournal and I think it's time for some change. Don't get me wrong; I'll still update my Livejournal though. Just don't expect my posts to be as personal I guess. I won't make the same mistake I did on LJ though, this blog will be FRIENDS ONLY! right from the start. (excluding this one of course) So, talk to me and maybe we can be friends
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Dude, the colours are supposed to create contrast. The darker, deep purple in the back is supposed to accentuate the bold yellow, which then makes the black font stand out. I think what's hurting your eyes is the small font! But it's a unique size ain't it? And another thing... I think I abuse HTML too much. I propose a... how do you say this, promise? Okay okay, I'll be more straightforward: I PROMISE, not to use to HTML excessively unless I am in dire need of it (as in the case of "I PROMISE"), or if I am in the mood to create more than just a literal masterpiece... Visual appeal is important too. Alright, so this has a sort of flaw to it... if I'm ALWAYS in the mood to create more than just a literal masterpiece, then I'm still practically doing what I promised I try not to. So THAT was a waste of text. |
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I'll make this short and simple. So it's gotten quite lonely here on aeonity. Barely any familiar individuals on this thing, because apparently everybody's on But thank god for my good friend Lauren, who came to my rescue and joined the network. Welcome dear friend! I would present you with say, a basket of fruit or like, a welcome pie or something, but apparently you can't do that over the internet... So continuing on... Lauren, I believe that we should recruit more of our fellows onto this and de-hypnotize them from the LJ wrath. Perhaps, my blogging would be put to more use if it were to be seen by people I appreciate? |
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After all these years of writing, that is, with a pencil, I have never come to notice the big lump which has developed on my middle finger. As funny as this sounds, it's actually pretty nasty looking. In actuality, it's a callous... A really gross one in fact. It's 'cause I hold my pencil weird. And I grip it tightly. It's sort of hard to explain without showing, but I'll try anyways... So the eraser end of the pencil lies on the bridge of skin between my thumb and my index. The tip of my index finger then presses on the pointed end of the pencil. The side of my middle finger supports the side of the pencil, and my thumb is tucked neatly underneath my index finger, causing my thumbnail to touch the side of my middle finger. Perhaps its this very contact - my thumbnail to my middle finger - which generated such a disgusting lump. Considering my vigorous movement as I write, the generated friction from this must have, overtime, irritated the skin on the side of my middle finger and caused such an eruption. Sadly, I doubt there's any way other than surgical procedure that could fix it. I mean, it's not even that bad looking, but it is noticeable when you look closely. When I bend my middle finger though, you can't tell as much that it's there. I guess I could live with it, but it gets dry a lot and it's just uncomfortable to look at! Why couldn't I have gotten callouses from playing the guitar or something? From a pencil? Come on... |
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| I haven't been there in ages! There's a new buzz going around school... Apparently, Wonderland's developed a new roller coaster called the Behemoth, and all its hype comes from its 85 degree drop! That's freaking crazy, it's practically... boom! It's sort of like, Drop Zone, but your going down face first. Considering my lack of courage for riding on high roller coasters and such, I would usually stray away from riding such a thing. But peer pressure's getting the best of me. If my friends were to go on to Wonderland, I would definitely want to go with them... I haven't been there since forever! The question is, would I actually go on the rides with them? Well, perhaps so, because it's just a waste of money to go to a theme park and stand waiting for your friends to finish their rides. See the thing is, speed isn't the problem, I get a thrill out of going fast. It's the height! I've always had something with being high... the possibility of something going wrong I guess? Stupid Final Destination! But yeah, I promise that one of these days during this summer, I will go on Behemoth, with friends or not. Okay I lied, friends have to be there! |
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Today wasn't bad. I actually woke up early... mind you, not on time, but early enough to fit in yes, an actual breakfast... and the rest of the daily morning activities. I took an Even if I got to the bus stop late, I didn't miss it because the bus itself came late. My morning was great. Well, up until I entered period one... Walking to period one wasn't such a thrill either. Let's just say a Something was different about history today. We actually did work. As in, more work than usual. She's starting to get on my nerves; she's not teaching us anything... instead, she's letting the freaking TV do it for her. I blame menopause. Then Khrysta tells me that Ms. Nealon got the gifted testing results. So I went there with a bunch of other anxious hopefuls for my results... apparently, they didn't have it ready and told us they'd have to call us in the next day... Sadly, I'm all packed with extracurriculars tomorrow! Oh, woe is me. Careers came next... Greeeat! My favourite class ever!... I intended that to be sarcastic. Another useless period talking about useless topics which weren't even related to careers, and doing useless exercises that will definitely not help me in choosing my career. Zabaneh is annoying too. Science was a brink of hope... supply teacher kicked me off the computer. All I was trying to do was print off notes to use for the open book exam. Oh well, I lived without them anyway. However, I completely blanked out on the entire thing. And surprisingly, last period was better than most. Spent the whole period reading Merchant of Venice, and finished the book. Despite my lack of understanding for the first half of the book, I actually enjoyed reading the ending. Then Woodside after school = begging around for spare change = two buns! Oh yeah baby! Oh and I forgot, I also fit in a drink with the money I acquired. Such a gold digger. Anyways, spent the rest of the afternoon at the park with Lauren. Great talks bout life which I will not go into detail about because it was one of those "in-the-moment" conversations. All in all, starting off my first Monday without having a piano lesson after school wasn't half bad. I'm real pumped for tomorrow though. Let's see... what was it again... Math in the morning, some violence assembly after, then music which is always a breath of fresh air, and art... which can be disappointing, but can be put up with. Extracurriculars should be the highlight, with double instrumental band rehearsals, and tennis practise... and perhaps some sort of game to watch later? Oh yeah, and Ms. Nealon better have my gifted results. |