http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk The 10 most recent public blogs by bassmonk Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:54:52 -0500 Aeonity Blog v2 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/63788 i wanted to pause and clean it up but i'm tired of perfect scenes and well worked out lines i want, no long for something more immediate is that so bad, it's risky, but i think it's more true, or at least more shocking, i saw my reflection, and saw it wither away, in the life of a planet it is hardly a split moment, and i've come, lived, and gone, only to be remembered by the likes of people like me who like walking through cemeteries and reading the stones, we all think we're so much the center, but that's not so bad, we each have our moment, why not shine? http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/63788 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/60 Fri, 22 Aug 2008 22:06:21 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/62587 it's been almost a month at my new place, living under the cell tower. i didn't realize there was a cell tower on top of my building until i'd been here a week or two. read up on it a bit. as with using a cell phone next to your head, there seems to be a void of research. i guess the lab rats don't often volunteer to spend their short lives next to an active cell phone or tower. i'm one floor higher than my last place. i was on the third floor - now i'm on the fourth floor. there is a bonus of two very slow but effective elevators. they appear to be identical. i think i'm in what was once a hotel of some sort. the doors to the apartments are all about 50% bigger than most apartment doors, and the hallways are filled with odd, yet generic artwork. not sure what to make of all that, but it's good for an odd stare the first time one sees it. i'm now a 5-minute walk from the lake. that's nice. i'm in a bit of a trendy neighborhood with lots of restaurants, theaters (not movie) and enough traffic on Friday and Saturday nights to make me glad that i really don't need a car to do most of what i do these days. people seem more friendly. in my last neighborhood, it wasn't unusual to say hello to someone on the street and have them simply ignore you, or worse, seem afraid of you. for the most part, when i've run into people in my current apartment building, they both say 'hello' back, and don't appear to be afraid of me. yeah, i know. but that's what it was like at my last place. and i'm really not scary looking. i definitely have my recluse tendencies, but they don't show. i think i look pretty ordinary, actually. so, off i go into another year of my city life. http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/62587 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/59 Mon, 28 Jul 2008 20:38:32 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/62233 i wandered out to the lake. i watched the water and the sky turn dark. eventually the water and sky became one in the darkness. and i knew it was ok. i had a dream once. it was a romantic notion. but i loaded my stuff into a car. then i climbed in the car and drove. drove west. and i started again. i've come to call it my 'wandering mystic' fantasy. i've tried to forget it. i've tried to reason it away. but it keeps coming back. i suppose i'm stuck with it. it's attached to me somehow, romantic notion or not. but there's something else. change is getting harder. i need to start making changes more often, or else it will get more and more difficult. to 'climb in the car'. and i need to keep going. http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/62233 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/58 Sun, 20 Jul 2008 20:23:23 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/62149 i rubbed my eyes and looked inside for something, but i can't stay in that part of my head, if for no other reason than that it just doesn't do me any good, i just need to go, to move, to be not-so-afraid, to keep walking toward the end of the street, past all the wandering, lost, and those who think they know where it all goes, but i'm not one of them, i'm neither lost nor know, i'm just caught up in my role, it's what i was born for, it's what i was tailored for, to be what i am on the back of someone else, to be a story, to be a set of lines that someone reads too stiff and fast, trying to get to the end before its time, just don't stop, i need to keep an eye on the cage door, dreaming of being free, or i won't know what to do when the door swings open, and everything changes. http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/62149 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/57 Sat, 19 Jul 2008 01:57:26 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/61207 i worried and bustled from thing to thing without even notice or telephone ring do you know do you know how my simple is messy and my dreams are so fussy they won't let me win though i beg and wine, i mean whine, no i really meant wine is it all, no stop, another train, i woke up in my bed thinking of not being able to sleep along a steep and slippery step i just can't take, ok back to the other train, fussy my dreams, they wish grandiose but slip away if i don't write them down, what kind of irony is that that i can't remember the bustle, the worry, the lack of hurry, no i mean worry or hurry, it's all going blurry... http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/61207 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/56 Mon, 30 Jun 2008 00:38:45 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60850 i'm starting to think that i should do a good move every year or two. box up everything, throw out the stuff i haven't used since the last move, and start new. maybe each place is like a cocoon, where i only can grow by climbing out. i've been in my current cocoon too long. it's not healthy for my soul. i'm struggling under the change of simply moving across town. i'm fearful. i'm nervous. i've stayed too long. i need to climb out at the right time, only to repeat it again and again. it is the way of life. to stay too long is to break the chain of events that add up to a life, to my life. so, off i go to a new set of walls, a new set of windows, a new place to call home. http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60850 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/55 Thu, 19 Jun 2008 21:04:33 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60681 i've been looking for a new place to live. i've lived west of downtown for about 6 years now, and i fear my roots have gone down more than i'm comfortable. i need a change. i really like walking to work, so i drew a circle around where i work on a map. i also wanted to be near the lake. that meant being either south of work (way too expensive - the center of downtown) or north, which is where i've been looking. it's funny how neighborhoods have certain reputations. some neighborhoods are tough. people who live there take pride in living (and perhaps surviving) there. other neighborhoods are social scenes. they are known as places to 'hook up'. there are artistic neighborhoods that go through a cycle that usually results in them being too expensive for artists to live there any more. what's the neighborhood i'm looking at? the north side of my city is where the richer folks live. not necessarily the richest, but definitely not down-and-out. if you're young there, you might be called a 'yuppie'. if you're older, i guess you'd just be called 'wealthy', though most people like that move out of town and into the northern suburbs. all i know is that i can afford an apartment there, and found a cool little studio. and i'm about a 10 minute walk from the lake, which is nice. i guess i have to decide whether labels matter much to me, or if it's just another place to call home. http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60681 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/54 Mon, 16 Jun 2008 22:21:54 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60311 we hurried on from one thing to another, each of us, lost in our given day. there were protocols. not too friendly. not too mean. a world of busy, unoffensive wall-flowers, building, or carrying, or selling one thing or another. outsiders would come and go. we would see them. but we didn't really see them. they would pause and say odd things while they rode the elevators with us. we would smile, and say something not too nice, not too mean, unoffensive. And then we would hurry away to the next thing. days would pass without much notice. lives would pass without much notice. i didn't notice any of it. then one day, while walking toward the entrance. one odd day, while almost to work, i stopped. the day still happened. i still hurried from one thing to the next. but for a moment, out on the same sidewalk i scurry along most of the day, i stopped. i heard something. i felt strange as the people all kept hurrying past me. for a moment, i heard the sirens and woke up. and i knew i could stop again. http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60311 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/53 Wed, 11 Jun 2008 20:41:42 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60207 I'm filling up my boxes with things. How did I get so many things? I didn't mean to. Somehow I just expanded. I had the room, so I got more stuff. A little piece of this equipment. An old guitar. Another bookcase. An old couch. Keep sorting. Keep tossing. Keep dropping off at charities. Keep carrying 'none of the above' stuff to garbage. And soon enough, there will just be a floor and a bunch of walls. http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60207 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/52 Mon, 09 Jun 2008 23:08:41 -0500 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60093 the roots grew strong. i stood at the end of the bridge, looking back. waffling. will there always be obstacles? i boxed up everything and put it in storage. then i walked out the front door, and then back into a new front door. there's no other way. one step after another. i've accomplished some big things under pressure. and i've fallen asleep under no pressure. keep pushing. keep going. time might be short. you never know. it's a wild ride, if you'll ride it. some stay at the bus stop. http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/blog/60093 http://www.aeonity.com/bassmonk/51 Fri, 06 Jun 2008 22:23:23 -0500