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I'm scared to do something for really no reason. I could do it, things would be ok and it would be over. But instead I'm being spastic about it. Yeah I'll let you all know in the next few days whether I get over it or not. Anybody notice how every single aspect of life is relateable to an episode of Seinfeld?? It's true and you can learn a lot!! |
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It doesn't matter if I'm bored and doing nothing or in the middle of some mind-exhausting task - I always come back to think about what was, what could have been, what the future holds. At this point its the past and behind me but I think about it still and wonder what it means for my future - have I learned my lesson? will I do it right next time around? do I have it in me to go back at it?. For now I think the answer is 'yes' to all of those questions but only time will tell and when I'm put back into it all will I know for sure. I'm ready for it again....I think....and yet I hold myself back for some reason. Will I start on the right path? tomorrow? next week? next month!?! The sooner the better because I can't drag on at this old age without having something to show for it all. For now lets say next week and we'll see how it goes. |
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The dream touched me in a way I didn't think possible. It was so powerfully laced with emotion but the actual imagery was even more powerful. It blew me out of the water and right now I just want to forget it - when's that going to happen!?!
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I shared my blog...well sorta...only those who check my facebook will find it for now...later I'll let everyone know 
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| I suspect that all of us crumble at some point and are a victim of this but I never thought it would happen so soon. I had things to write about but just decided it'd be easier to sit around on my ass and not! But anywho...last night I finally felt like me - something I hadn't in quite awhile. As weird as that sounds I just thought I was holding something back and finally I had the chance to let myself loose and it felt great. It REALLY felt great. I hope it stays this way. Tomorrow night of course is UPenn bar night - so I'm hoping for another lengthy tale from that - I really want to get Seth drunk out of his mind but he keeps holding back so tomorrow night is just gonna be ridiculous cause I'm gonna let loose and let the drinking come on - it might be one of those ridiculous chalupa nights that I have so many stories from - lets just hope my head doesn't have to deal with the consequences. |