Can't decide, do I like this picture or should I delete it from my computer?

Feb 19th, 2005 4:40:18 pm - Subscribe
4 blah(s)

Oh maaaaaaaan
I'm so boooooooooooored!
I really didn't do anything today and I feel like I wasted the day and dragged myself through the hours!
I also still feel full even though I haven't eaten that much and I'm just meh and I'd need someone to cheer me up...
Or to excite me cuz that is one of the greatest feelings!
Right now, there's no real excitement in my life and that sucks.
I feel like crying though!!! sad.gif
Fucking hell...

Feb 19th, 2005 3:32:31 pm - Subscribe
1 blah(s)


I'm just trying out my new computerrrrrrrrr... lmao
Feb 19th, 2005 10:37:14 am - Subscribe
1 blah(s)

It is not night when I do see your face,
Therefore I think I am not in the night;
Nor doth this wood lack worlds of company,
For you, in my respect, are all the world.
Then how can it be said I am alone,
When all the world is here to look on me?

Feb 18th, 2005 4:13:16 pm - Subscribe
1 blah(s)

I had to work today with Silvia and it was actually so much fun.
She's really great and I really like her already.
Anyway, we had to work OUTSIDE! Just because they couldn't get the fucking wheel to the shopping center.
So we first went to McD had some fun fries and started working half, and went to a supermarket and bought Ritz crackers and just had fun.
We got 14 cards filled hahahaha.
But it's their fault, it was fucking cold!

Siân is really getting worse and doesn't see what's right and what's wrong, we really have to talk to her about that, we all 4.

And I just finished phoning with Brendan and it was again, very nice.
He's so cute and his voice sounds so calm and I just love listening to him.
I also ranted about Siân and talked like 5 mins without a break... sorry lol

Or I will start wearing thongs again, no, G-Strings! Hah! so who's clever now??!!

I'm so tired and my mum was to the cinema and left the popcorn there, instead of bringing it along and making me a bit happy! sad.gif
Damn her!

Oh well, I finally have a calendar book but now I can't even remember the important dates, apart from my bday and Brendan's lol.
And I can't be bothered looking them up.
Oh well, I'll draw stuff in it now.
Feb 18th, 2005 3:51:35 pm - Subscribe
1 blah(s)


Brendan, you are hot! wink.gif
Feb 17th, 2005 5:03:32 pm - Subscribe
7 blah(s)

Why am I that kind of person who can't actually hide this feeling?
I can hide my feelings when I'm sad but not when I'm pissed off.
I just can't!
Today Siân just annoyed me so much, well she annoyed me for a few days now but today was just too much!
She is a person who ALWAYS wants to be right about things and ALWAYS thinks she's right about EVERYTHING! You can't even discuss with her cuz she always interrupts you and generally she fucking talks too much.
And in the lunchbreak she always comes with Laura and me somehow, I mean yeah, we are friends but PISS OFF!
So today she just talked and talked and tried to get our attention like she always does and I couldn't be bothered talking to her so I just answered shortly.
Then she asked me if I'm in a bad mood and honestly, I wasn't, SHE just pissed me off.
So in history she talked and talked and talked and mentioned one little thing at the end.
Then I said something about it, further and the teacher wanted me to repeat it cuz it was important and afterwards she whispered, but loud enough that I can hear it, "I already said that!"
And gah, I was sooooo close to just tell her to shut up but didn't.
Then she didn't get what we were talking about, cuz she was thinking that it must be so and so (mind, she was just THINKING, not knowing ffs!) then I told her she's wrong and even the teacher said what she said was not right but she STILL talked and I said: [very sarcastic]Yeah Siân, alright[/very sarcastic].
Then she was annoyed at me.
In the break she said if i don't wanna talk to her then I should just tell her she's absolutely fine with it (hahaha, as if!).
Then she said she's just bitchy cuz I was bitchy to her all day, WTF?! I hardly talked to her and when I did I wasn't bitchy, just short.
So AGAIN she was making up things and I so hate that and I can't believe how a person can be like this!
Her mum is exactly like this and man, that is fucking annoying.

Then I changed my p.e. course and played fooball today and it was really easy and quite nice.

Guess what! Silvia didn't get her money yet!!!!!!!!!
She's working there since october I think and she still hasn't seen money! OK 50 euros of 300 something!!!
Gah, what do they think they are?
If I don't get my fucking money, my parents gonna sue them.
We will threaten them with it and I bet they don't wanna get in trouble cuz they know we are RIGHT!
Oh well, nice day huh?
Feb 17th, 2005 12:38:38 pm - Subscribe
1 blah(s)

Last night I phoned with Brendan.
We first chatted and I felt the need of his presence, like always, but especially last night and phoning is the closest thing we can get at the moment.
So I called him at half past 12am and it was so lovely.
I felt like he was lying next to me, whispering in my ear and also cuddling me.
It was also quite funny and cosy at the same time.
I miss him so much, I want him in my bed, giving me his warmth and all that.
And things led to another and even though it's surely not the most intimate moment, it was in a different way very very personal which also shows how much we trust each other.
I loved it and we phoned till half past 2 and I enjoyed every second...

This morning I was tired and I was tired all day but when I came home I couldn't get to sleep... it's weird.

My mum told me that my dad's firm want to fire everyone who's 60 and older now and my dad turns 60 next year so he will probably become unemployed.
I first was shocked but then my mum told me what they have planned.
He will get a compensation with which they gonna pay all their debts, also sell their flat and move to Korea.
They will have a better life there, with the money my dad gets they don't need to worry and they can finally just rest.
There's also my mums family and I just wish they get happy there.

I don't know, I feel weird and I feel a bit out of place right now...
Feb 16th, 2005 12:30:33 pm - Subscribe
1 blah(s)

Fine day
Today was nice.
I slept quite alot and wasn't really tired, then in history I had my presentation and it was good. grin.gif
Then that was it, I could have gone home but I went to Pizza Hut with Siân and had a nice cheesy crust supreme pizza and it was awesome! But I'm quite fed up with pizza for now.
Then I went home and tried to sleep which was difficult as I drank half a liter of Pepsi light already!
I even did my english homework already bwahahaha, I feel like I have everything under control and I love it!
I only need a frigging calendar book! They are all sold out! Wtf, it shouldn't be THAT hard to find one!
I will also work on friday and I dreamt such a mess!
I dreamt that I was on the meeting we will have on monday to discuss further about work and the new boss wants to see us etc. and well there was a bed and we lied on it, then fell asleep, when I woke up it was all over and they said I can only work once this month cuz there's nothing left and I was soo angry and asked why they didn't wake me up and that I really need the money!
I also saw some guy in a Santa costume and a mask ripping all the balloons with a knife and damn that looked creepy!

Umm that was it actually.
Feb 15th, 2005 12:41:21 pm - Subscribe
2 blah(s)

Val val valentines day
It's valentines day and I don't give a fuck.
I got nice presents already and when people start hating this day just for the sake of hating, then they are stupid.
Why hating this day?
Either ignore it or celebrate it, ok u can get sick of all those couple around but meh, I hardly actually noticed this day.
I finally finished this fucking presantation for school and I will NEVER raise my hand again when its asked who would want to do one.
Anyway, I will only have history tomorrow, then I might just go shopping with Siân and Laura.
Haha, I already know that there will be alot of arguments on Malta when only we are always together...
I wish Vicky would come along then it wouldn't be that bad...

I looooooooooove Brendan, he's so cute today, dunno why, just is.
I love you.. happy.gif
Feb 14th, 2005 2:03:45 pm - Subscribe
4 blah(s)

el oh el
Brendan's back and I'm happy happy happy! grin.gif
I also feel like lovely jubly bubbly anyway, so yeah:

That's all cuz there's nothing interesting going on right now.
Feb 13th, 2005 1:15:14 pm - Subscribe
4 blah(s)

Gah, again, I slept all day!
I always use the weekend to sleep more than I need to but somehow I have nothing to do, especially not today as Brendan is in London but meh, I wasted a day again.
I just want to watch a good film, eat loads of junk and no one should disturb me!

Now to the good news:
Brendan's present has arrived and it's fantastic!
He bought me a necklace with a sweet heart...

And lovehearts!
Okay, let's see what the next one says...
The card was sooooo sweet and the letter!
It is seriously scary how similiar the beginning is! It's cuz we match so perfectly!

Thanks Brendan, I love you so much I can't describe, you enspire and support me so much that I feel like a new person whenever I see you.
You are everything I've ever wanted.
Thanks for being such a lovely boyfriend. ♥
Feb 12th, 2005 11:55:32 am - Subscribe
3 blah(s)

Long day, had school then worked from 3-7pm.
I was with Silvia and man, she's so cool...
It was soo quiet there though that we only got 30 cards filled out!
Umm, she also has a tattoo and it looks ace and she kinda convinced me to get one too cuz I wasn't sure but it looks very nice...
So I'll probably get a stars tatt, below my belly, on each site, I think that would look ace.
But before that I have to wait and see if I get accepted for being a sg, so if so I'll get money and then I have the money together for the flight to aus, then I will use the money I earn with the promotion to get me a tatt!
So it all depends on that, I fucking hope it will work cuz if not I'll be a very sad bunny.
I'm so happy it's weekend now, I need to sleep!!!
Also, very important:

6 months ago I first met Brendan and I was sosososososo sure that I just want him!
Hehe, I knew it before actually but well, I haven't met him before so I couldn't probably say that.
But his present hasn't arrived today sad.gif.
But his and he likes it. happy.gif
But meh, he will be gone to London tomorrow, that's shit cuz he wanted to talk to me while I open it.
Oh well..
I wonder what he bought me...
Feb 11th, 2005 2:14:22 pm - Subscribe
2 blah(s)

Fucking long day...
Damn P.E. and damn timetable!!
Anyway, I've changed my course, now I'm playing football and school finishes earlier for me, thank fuck.
I also was at the gym and they finally got my bank details and stuff and I really really hope they organise all the stuff cuz I want my money and I wanna know what's going on.
Well I work tomorrow and the next 2 fridays, so I hope I can earn a bit this month...

Vicky is ill and Siân wasn't at school, probably cuz she split up with her bf.
So in history there were only Laura, Sina and me at one table and Sina was nice today.
I know she's sometimes quite nice and then I actually like her, I wish she would be always like that...
She then gave me a lift to town and then I went home.
I'm sooooo tired and I need to sleep, so I'll go to bed early tonight, this time I mean it!!!
Feb 10th, 2005 12:40:27 pm - Subscribe
2 blah(s)

Today was a bit boring, nothing happened.
Hmm, I dreamt that I was somewhere caught in Ice and when i finally got out there was water and it was cold...

Oh, O.C. is on...

Well, I sent Brendan's present and hopefully it arrives on friday...

Ummm, even though I talk to him everyday it feels like I hardly spent time with him, it's horrible, the time passes too quick and all I want is to be with him 24/7 haha.
Naah, but somehow most days in the week are wasted and I miss my own life...
Right now I don't feel down but I'm not happy either, I'm somewhere between and I hate that.
I think I need some days off.. *sighs*

I was thinking about a tiny pink heart tattoo near my hips, I think that would look cute...

Anyway, meh...
Feb 9th, 2005 3:22:14 pm - Subscribe
1 blah(s)

I looove Nip Tuck!
When the last Sex and the City episode was on I was really sad and thought meh, it will be boring on tuesday now but then Nip Tuck came and I really love it! I love the drama!

Arghs, MSN didn't work till now and Brendan and I used Soulseek to chat! Luckily it's back, I really love MSN, I do, but sometimes it just pisses me off...

I got a mail yesterday from Missy and she said that they really like it and they gonna see if they can work with the photos.
They'll tell me in a few weeks and I PRAY that I finally can become a Suicide Girl!

I also bought 2 little pressies for Brendan, they are really nice but somehow I think it's not enough for the anniversay...
Hmmm, but I don't have money and Mango didn't call yet... :\
I hope I get the job cuz I really really need the damn money!
What else?
Ah, I dreamt that A left some message for us in the VISIONS, saying how cute we are (Brendan and I) and that they find it ace that we met because of them, lol.

I'm ok actually, just worry about money a bit... sad.gif

Oh well, this is my new blog! Yay!
Feb 8th, 2005 3:23:32 pm - Subscribe
5 blah(s)