Just thinking
Date: Mar 1st, 2004 11:09:26 am - Subscribe
Mood: sympathetic
Last night I watched Billy Crystal on the Barbara Walters special. He looked so different than I remember him looking. He was always smiling and laughing but not now. After she started to interview him I realized why he seemed so different. She asked him about recent loss of his mother, I recognized that look, he started to tear up and said "nothing is funny anymore, what can be funny now?"
During the awards show he did not smile, he said all the silly things he was supposed to say but he wasn't the same.
That is exactly how I feel, nothing is the same, nothing has the same meaning, nothing matters in the same way. After the loss of someone so close life is completely different. You think no one understands how you feel. But I know Billy Crystal understands how I feel and I don't feel so alone now. There are people feeling the same as me and that helps in a strange way.
Comments: (1)
Weird-o
Date: Feb 26th, 2004 12:21:05 pm - Subscribe
Mood: weird
A couple of years back I was in a car accident and I injured my back and neck. I needed surgery on both so I chose to have the back done first then the neck. The back surgery involved having Titanium plates and screws put into my back, what fun. Well when I woke up from that surgery the pain was so bad that I prayed that the nurses would over dose me and I would die by accident. But they never did and I suffered and suffered and I am still here. After having physical therapy and lots of pain medicine I am doing very well in the back department. But the neck is a different story the doctor wants to do the next surgery, I don't think so, not yet anyway. But unfotunately the pain is worsening. He sent me to the physical therapist again. The problem with that is that this guy starts talking about sex every time He comes in the room! The first day I'm on the table on my back with him at my head, his hands under my head stretching my neck muscles at least that's what he said he was doing, and he tells me about his upcoming vacation. He says his wife thinks he's a pig because he wants vacation sex, then he leans over me face to face and asks "do you think I'm a pig?" Then he goes on and on about it. I say oh no I don't think your a pig, as i'm thinking (he is a pig and stop looking at my body you perv.)
Well then the next time I went another therapist wanted to do my therapy because my guy was running late, so they argued outside my door he didn't want her to do it he said he will be right in. Ok so I waited and he came in and told me to put a gown on so he could massage my neck, he say's "oh you can leave your brazzere on" who say's that anymore? I can't even spell it. So as he's massaging my neck he opens with "my wife doesn't like sexual games" if he could only see my face! You know dress up games and massages, she won't let him massage her. Why does he tell me these things? Then he say's "nice scar on you back, how far does it go down?" Why is he looking down there my neck is up here!! He then tells me about his wife's c-section scar, how he has never seen it but thinks it's hidden in her pubic hair, she does't shave there you know!! Information I really needed! Well tomorrow I will see him again, I can't wait for that interesting conversation. I'ts kinda funny
and kinda completely wrong at the same time, good thing i'm old enough to find the humor in it. 
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Marriage
Date: Feb 24th, 2004 3:28:10 pm - Subscribe
Mood: irritated
I don't understand the big problem with gay marriage, why does it matter to so many people? Why should people have a problem with two people who love each other wanting to be married? If any two people want to get married let them and be happy for them.
They aren't hurting anyone, but people are hurting them! Are our lives better if gay people don't get married? I don't think so.
It doesn't help my life in any way, how about you, is it helping? All the publicity about this is so annoying, don't we have other issues that could use news coverage other than this. There are so many heterosexual couples that are allowed to be married when they clearly shouldn't be, but because they are a man and a woman it's ok, they aren't put under a microscope. The wife beater, the child abuser anything goes as long as you are a man and a woman.
I think to qualify for marriage it should be determined whether you are a good, kind person, if your going to treat your spouse with dignity and respect, whether you will be a good parent if you have children, if you will be trusting and faithful. Things of this nature should be qualifications of the marrying couple not if your a man or woman.
People say that it is hard for the children of gay couples. I think that a child that is adopted and living with two parents that love them and take care of them, and teach them right from wrong, parents that can hug them and kiss them goodnight are in a wonderful place and the public should thank god these children are loved.
But that is only my opinion.
Comments: (1)
Poor boy
Date: Feb 23rd, 2004 3:26:48 pm - Subscribe
Mood: sympathetic
This young man is crazy about my daughter, but she is not interest in him. He is seems to be very sweet and is nice looking but the problem is that he is to shy. They work at the same place but they do not talk, he tells everyone but her that he's crazy about her. For Valentines he drove 4 hours and got lost looking for a special store someone told him about to buy her a stuffed animal. He gave it to one of the girls at work to give to her, because he was to shy.
I really wish there was a way for kids to get over all the shyness, you can miss out on a lot of special things in life because of it.
If they only would give things a chance and let go of the fear. All someone can say to you is yes or no. You won't die, you won't blow-up, you will only move on to the next experience, and what is life with experiences?
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Living in Long Underwear
Date: Feb 13th, 2004 1:58:19 pm - Subscribe
Mood: mellow
I am freezing, I think it's 7 degrees out. It is so windy and cold. I live in Niagara Falls, NY. We are often colder than Buffalo and I'm pretty sure today is one of those days.
While putting gas in my car the wind was burning my face and tears were running down my cheeks.
Why do I not live in Florida?
I'm sure my husbands parents are sipping on nice cold fancy drinks poolside right now! Lucky Ducks..
I think about moving to a warmer place but then I would have to move, my kids, my mother, my sisters, my friends and five cats, a sheepdog, a chihuahua, and a very loud bird!!
I guess until I get brave enough to move all of that I will be staying in this freezing cold, living in long underwear.
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