confused but quiet
Date: Jun 29th, 2004 9:27:57 am - Subscribe
Mood: pensive
MY 5-10 YR PLAN/RETIREMENT!: working on cool vs stress with others
Checking up on my goals, long term, means I also have to pay attn to my short term goals. In Sept I will be going to Diano to visit my family, with Ron. It will be an expense but I think we really need to get away.
The thing I have to work on is, not feeling responsibile for everyone else's feelings....like when I invite the crowd over for a bbq and a swim. I feel like I'm so pressured to cook and clean for everyone, then I also have to keep Jenna entertained, but I don't have the energy to do it all.
then I end up feeling guilty.
Not the way to go.
Gotta keep telling myself that I am not the ever ready bunnie, I just can't keep on going. I am human.
I am 50 and surely that must mean something.
It's like I have to LEARN to become more selfish.
That's not a bad thing, it just means to focus on me so that I'm not always worried about others first.
Because if I can be cool with myself then maybe I can radiate that cool instead of radiating stress which is what I seem to do now.
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