eternia's Aeonity Blog - October 2005

I seem to be coming across anomic-disoriented entries. I'm guessing everyone here's in their teens? I've been there. (yes, I'm old enough to be your (older) brother) Everyone seems to be in isolation mode. That's alright. Everybody does. Maybe except people who buys their own friends.

I've no friends or whatsoever. Maybe there's 2, only two. I don't get to see them or anything cause' they live an hour or so from my place, and that we each have our own lives to flow. I used to have friends, not a lot, but we'd hang. I broke everything off just one day. I realized, I am not to be used, not to be bought, not be look down upon. I'm alright somehow. I'm still breathing. I'll find the right people..maybe.... I'm extremely shy and anti-social, which makes things more complex than they already are...for me. That's why I always have my iPod with me wherever I walk. Music is my close friend. Its also why I no longer wrist-slash like how I was back then. Cause' I know there are others out there who are more unfortunate than how my current circumstances are. I'll just put on my smiling-face mask and everyone will know that I'm okay.

If you don't mind, I'm not really in the same disposition as you are there. You may feel like shit and everything else, but you still have a soul. I didn't sold mine or anything. I just lost it at some point in my past life. Now I'm crying cause' I'm still looking for it. After all, I need to love in order for them to give me the love I need in return. It would not be fair to them. I probably won't be logging here for a while so... But I'll be around reading each's blogs. Because in a way, you don't make me feel totally alienated and alone in this fucked up existence of mine. peace!

update: (10:34pm) I just finished watching, The New Music, its a half-hour music show here in Canada, and as you can see from the name, it features upcoming artists or indie bands no one's (really) heard of. I'm in need of some fresh sounds after tirelessly listening to mainstream thrash on the local radio station or those overrated music vids I see on MTV and MuchMusic.

According to this online news article I read (I'm having trouble looking for it now, but if I find it eventually, I'll post it here), of the consumers who have the 3rd-Gen (20-60gig) iPod, only 20% of them were surveyed to have over 1,000 songs in their own iPods. I got mine in the Summer of 2004 when we were still living in New Jersey. Honestly, up until now, I only have over 600 songs in it. So as you can see, I'll be 60-yrs-old and I still won't be able to fill at least 80% of its storage capacity lol! I've been listening to a lot of indie and trying to occassionally know more electronica/trance genre as well.

But from this night's eps. of The New Music, I'm gonna check out, K'naan. I don't normally listen to Urban sounds, but this guy isn't anything like 50cent or Mr. I've-gots-the-bling-blingz we'd usually see on MTV. This guy has a different concept, and most of all, his music came from his roots and his heart. So check him out. Just so you wanna know what other acts they profiled from tonight's eps., some of you may (or have) already know them: Interpol (I have their, Turn On the Bright Lights LP, it rocks!), Beck (we already know him), Black Mountain, Annie, and gigs at this year's 2005 Pop Montreal.

sayonara.