so, today is the nationwide celebration of love. in the name of saint valentine; who, i must say, is never recognized as a person. i'm not even sure if there WAS a saint valentine. talk about recognition. you get a day named after you, and then all it turns into is chocolates and roses.
then again, screw that rant; what am i saying? valentine's day is fantastic. even when i was single i thought it was one of the funnest days of the year, just because the air was thick with excitement. i love that.
anyhow, josh and i decided not to do anything for valentine's day. we're both broke and clueless; i'm just happy he's at school today. that's enough for me. well; i wish i could see him all night. i should sneak to his place and spend the night, haha. like that'd work out. i just want to lay there with him.
in time, in time.
yeah. i'm full of love. it's fun having valentine's day happen when you're in love with someone. this is new. i don't even care that we didn't get to do anything. just knowing he's mine and i'm his is perfect.
oh yes... the good times are rolling, indeed.
well, that's enough for a first entry.
happy saint valentine's day. the only downer is wondering how many people will hang themselves in their closets tonight.
but let's not dwell, hmm?
i've been in a morbid romantic mood all day. that was only a taste of morbid. heh.
AND THANK YOU NINE INCH NAILS FOR ACCENTUATING THIS ROMANTIC DAY WITH THE SONG "CLOSER", WHICH I HAVE BEEN LISTENING TO ALL MORNING.
so, yesterday, as i'd said, was wonderful. besides the unpleasantries of parents being annoyed at you. besides that, though, yeah. i was surprised with a single yellow rose, which brought me to a dizzying love high for a few hours.
then we talked on the phone about looking at the stars with each other. and cuddling. i desperately needed him to cuddle with lastnight. but alas, he was gone, so i curled into fetal position and watched maybe a quarter of the movie Meet Joe Black in my room. lights off, window open. brrrr.
heater blankets are a plus. especially if you open your window up wide as soon as you get home.
anyway, so i was eating a few slices of tangerine lastnight and i was completely fascinated with the insides; the textures, the smell, the sight, the taste... it was like being stoned. not to say i have been stoned, but i think we both understand better what i mean. i was completely fixated on this tangerine slice.
i mean, come on! it's like an orange jewel. hundreds of tiny, slick, membrane-bound sacs of citrus flesh. feeling the thin skins of those sacs tear open between my teeth and the juice spilling over my tongue is like... wow. oranges and tangerines give me what i can only describe as a mouth orgasm.
okay, i'm starting to sound weird.
maybe i'll do another post later. when i don't crave tangerines.
i'm doing a comic book project that, in time, will be submitted to Slave Labor Graphics (SLG; www.slavelaborcom). the plot is somewhat secretive because i'm paranoid about people stealing my idea.
i need a name for the main girl in the story. she's sort of a "goth" type, if you will, and i want her to have a unique yet clever name. nothing too outlandish or cheesy. but i figured i'd ask for a push in the right direction.
it isn't, really. i just like that Smashing Pumpkins song. Billy Corgan... what a guy. he helped Courtney Love cheat on Kurt Cobain. let us all burn her alive. stupid harlot.
today was relatively amusing... there was a big, hour-and-a-half assembly today for awards. in case anyone cared to know, i didn't get any. no surprises; i don't do anything worth noting in school anymore. just your average B-, C+ student.
okay well, hopefully josh is coming over tomorrow. i want to cuddle. and i shall. and we will watch Constantine, so help me we will.
take Keanu Reeves and a younger Trent Reznor and make them copulate. a baby is born. sixteen years later, put that kid in some gothic clothes, give him some Nightwish CDs, and show him how to play video games like no other and you've got my boyfriend.
i am lucky... i've got a mix of Trent and Keanu. yummm.
i'm learning gee-tarr. rem has lent me her acoustic, and i shall learn. because we are trying to start up a band again. this time we will do it, though, because i will practice daily. i need to learn this stuff. learny learn learn.
okay. i've rambled. goodbye now.
i forgot to mention. i had a nightmare lastnight. i was in either a hotel or some kind of mansion, staying for a bit in some room, and there was this guy who was helping me carry my things. i left the bedroom for a moment and when i returned, he was gone.
i got reeeaaaaal concerned by that for some reason. so i looked in the closet.
and he had hanged himself in the closet! what the hell kind of dream is that!