Distracted again
Date: Apr 1st, 2009 7:11:55 pm - Subscribe
Mood: psycho
Riding on a bus, I came back home in Manila hoping that the dawn will shine upon me, after a long series of unfortunate events, tragedies that plagued my understanding of myself that concerns my academic life, my relationships, and the friendships that I build for four years. I hope that there is one more chance on earth that I can be. I will search for that.
I always wanted to do a lot of things, and I realized that it only goes through my head. Sometimes I would think I want to be somebody like Matanglawin Kim Atienza, who was able to share his love for nature through his weekend TV program. I love sharing ideas and concepts to other people, trying to be wholesome, because I think there are so much things in my head that I can not contain. I remember the time when my cousin Kat told me one dull afternoon in the house that indeed, I am an intellectual person, someone who always asks where most of the time, the questions are not that important, but still I ask, so that even my words do not complement with the emotional attachment each supposes to have when spoken of. I have a low emotional quotient.
Or do I really have? I know I am a very personal person, someone who can't laugh in front of a huge crowd like in fast foods and malls, fearing that the people around me would be distracted and would stare at me with rage, so that when I talk to someone, I see to it that our distance is close enough so that we can hear each other, as if the line of communication is well-protected in between our arms. That way, while no other person can clearly hear our conversation, no one will never understand us, and will decide not to butt in.
I hesitate to write as many words as I can write, thinking that people will treat me as somebody who is special. I don't wanna elaborate more about that. Perhaps soon.
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