Changes
Date: Mar 3rd, 2004 3:47:10 pm - Subscribe
Mood: numb
Soundtrack: "Boris the Spider" by The Who
So...here's an update from the frontlines...
I'm in a synth-pop band now. We have yet to practice, but I'll be hitting things hard (playing the drums).
I have a boyfriend named Jeff, who is a political science major. I've known him for about a month and a half, but we've been inseperable ever since last Thursday.
I am going to drop my film class and change my major, but I have no idea what I am going to change it to.
I'm going to live in Carbondale over the summer...I'll save my sanity by not having to move all my crap from Carbondale to Chicago, and back to Carbondale. I'll also be able to live cheaper down here, and maybe I'll take a summer class.
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I Feel Like Shit
Date: Feb 26th, 2004 6:07:59 pm - Subscribe
Mood: shitty
Soundtrack: "I Don't Care" by the Ramones
I feel so shitty. Everyone is being an asshole to me. I wanted to go to Seattle over spring break to see a friend, but that's not happening. I'm doing bad in all my classes. Fuck everything, it all sucks.
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It's Been Awhile...
Date: Feb 23rd, 2004 3:34:32 pm - Subscribe
Mood: Happy (which is weird, because I shouldn't be...but that Screeching Weasel story just made me smile again).
Soundtrack: "Drenched In Blood Again" by Turbonegro
Sorry I haven't written in a long time. I've been busy with everything, and my mental stability is slowly going haywire.
First things first, Mr. Film Project-guy totally screwed me over. He actually is still screwing me over, by not calling me and telling me when we can work on this film. It's due in about two weeks, and we haven't even begun filming. I refuse to call him, just because of the bullshit he put me through. Okay, yeah, he used me. I even bought him dinner one night, and he totally fucking used me. He won't have anything to do with me now. You know, you'd think that after about ten years of dating and getting fucked over I would learn by now, but no. I never learn. Every time someone else comes into my life, I think that this person is going to be different, and this person is not going to fuck me over. Then they do. Now I'm pissed off at everyone, and I have made a promise to myself that this has been the last time. Next time I won't let the person fuck me over. If they do, I will fuck them over ten times harder. I'm sorry, I know that sounds a little harsh, but I am tired of being a human doormat for everyone. This is it, end of fucking list.
On a brighter note, I went up to Chicago last Tuesday to see the Mr. T Experience with Nighthawk and a few of his friends. They were playing at the Fireside Bowl (one of my old haunts) and there was a rumor circulating around that Screeching Weasel was going to play a short set that night. Well, we were in the bar, and all of a sudden, we heard Screeching Weasel! We just about flipped out. They played a lot of stuff off of "Wiggle" and "My Brain Hurts". I wish they would have played "Every Night" because that is one of my favorite Screeching Weasel songs, but I can't complain. They even did an encore with "I Can See Clearly". After the show, Nighthawk wanted to get his picture taken with the band. I told him Ben Weasel would probably punch him in the mouth when he asked him, but I went up to them anyway, armed with Nighthawk's camera and an anticipation to either hear a lot of yelling or see a lot of blood. When Nighthawk asked Jughead, he said sure, and then a girl grabbed the camera from me and Nighthawk and I got our picture taken with Screeching Weasel. That one's going on the wall and in the books!
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"Splendiforous"
Date: Feb 12th, 2004 8:33:33 pm - Subscribe
Mood: slap-happy tired
Soundtrack: "Children of the Revolution" by T-Rex
Last night I bought "American Splendor" on DVD. The movie is about Harvey Pekar, who wrote a comic by the same name as the movie. It is a very hilarious and touching movie, and I recommend it to everyone. They incorporate a lot of interesting elements during the movie (they interview the real Harvey Pekar and his wife in documentary-style and his drawings come alive throughout the movie and populate his world). The only big downer in the movie is when Harvey is diagnosed with lymphoma. In the end though, everything turns out right.
I got two hours of sleep last night. Actually, the sleep I got was this morning. Last night I met my much-thought-about film partner and we started discussing ideas for our project over coffee at the Longbranch. After four cups each, we were completely wired and ready to take on the world. We went back to my place to watch "American Splendor", and we finished that at about midnight. Then we proceeded to talk about everything and anything and listen to music until about five in the morning, when all of a sudden he leaned over and kissed me. He pulled away and said he was sorry. I told him not to be sorry, that I had wanted to do that, but I was too scared to (which is the truth), and, um...well, we made out and then passed out for about two hours. Nothing big happened, especially not that, but it was nice to have some warm human touch and sleep next to someone. After talking to him, I know now that I really do like him. He reads and enjoys art and museums and movies and I guess he enjoys my company, which is good. I don't know how the project thing will go though. Now I feel like I'll get in trouble because I made out with my film partner and I like my film partner. Maybe he asked me to be his partner because he likes me, too? Maybe he asked me to be his film partner because he just wanted to see how I kissed?
I have no idea, it's exciting and scary at the same time.
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Oolong Tea and Bowling
Date: Feb 11th, 2004 5:15:54 pm - Subscribe
Mood: tired
Soundtrack: "I Live for Speed" by The Star Spangles
Last night I went out on a date. It was the first date I've gone out on in awhile. It was a blind date, and I met him at the Longbranch, which is this little cafe in town that's got a great atmosphere and an even better menu.
The date went mediocre. We mostly talked about the school and the town, bands we've seen, bands we'd like to see, and we bitched about how no bands ever come here. We talked about work and Chicago and St. Louis, and I found it rather annoying that he practically invited himself on my St. Louis excursion this weekend, to go to a friend's magazine release party. When I told him I was going to see the Reverend Horton Heat in Nashville next month, he asked if he could go with right away. Either he's just as lonely as I am, or he's a big city junkie.
After our tea and countless cigarettes, we went to the Stupid Center to go bowling. He tried holding my hand, but I had none of it. I'm not the type of girl who holds hands on the first date, or even kisses a guy good-night on the first date (unless it's someone I have had a huge crush on for a long time, and I can't contain myself).
I actually did decent at bowling, which is surprising, seeing how I haven't bowled in about two years, and I wasn't wearing my glasses last night, which causes me to be blind. I broke 100!
At the end of the night, when he dropped me off at my car (I think he wanted to go back to the Longbranch for some more tea and cigarettes, but I was tired and felt as though the night were strange enough as it was), I think he wanted to kiss me. I just kept shaking his hand and telling him it was really nice to meet him, thanks for bowling, and I'd call him.
When I got home, I called up my friend Nighthawk, whose party it is I'm going to this weekend. He gave me directions to the "road house" and invited me to a monster truck rally on Saturday night with a bunch of people. I've never been to one, and frankly, I'm excited (no matter how low-brow it is). Last summer, when I was dating Damian, we went to a figure-8 race just outside of Detroit, and that was a blast! I can only imagine what it'll be like to see a glorified pick-up truck smash a bunch of old cars.
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