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xmidnightx misinterpretation by you and i - Subscribe

things are taken for granted too often these days. simple phrases which people use on a day to day basis seem to have lost their meaning.
an obvious suggestion would be i love you. how many people say it and actually mean it these days? do people actually know what it means? granted, it means different things to different people, but it is still thrown around.
i mean, it isn't just this phrase that got me thinking, there is so much that we probably don't comprehend, but say anyway - probably because we have heard other people use it, in the same context or something to that suit.

sorry about my little... rant - if you will, i just felt i needed to express it.

1 Comments
Mood: literate
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: jeans, quicksilver sweater, lilac scarf

xmidnightx you all remember pokemon right?! Aug 6th, 2005 7:46:03 am - Subscribe

sorry i havent't been blogging that often recently, i don't know why, i don't think i have been that busy. i guess i have just been at duncs alot recently.
yesterday was odd... things just seemed kinda weird, i thought i had done something wrong and that dunc was going to finish with me. parkes helped me alot last night, i needed someone to talk to and i just couldn't think of who i could talk to, he was perfect! he helped me. and he invited me to his house when i come back from gran canaria, which will be awesome, i can't wait! i REALLY hope that it happens though, because he is a really good friend to me! so yea, i confronted duncan, and things are ok i think, so that is ok!
today i am boring, i have no plans until 11:30 pm! in which i am going to the cinema - what a stupid time that is! but i think it is the last showing so... yea im going to see dark water? i think, roger and i said we would go to see it so... the last time we went to the cinema was to see chicken run! now that was a looooooooooooong time ago! lol!
i am hooked on incubus right now, i am obsessed! however, i am trying to wean myself into screamo, some of it isn't working though, but nevermind! it might take time!
i won two pairs of (fake) converse on ebay the other day, in total they cost £3.20! for TWO pairs of lush shoes! they are both nice pairs, one light blue pair and one striped pair! they came this morning, but i was in bed and didn't hear the doorbell, so i have to go to the post office HQ to get them, however, i can't get there myself, and my mom is working on monday! so im screwed!

i have booked my coach ticket! i am going to see matt on the 27th august! 2 days after i get my results! i am meeting him in guildford, i will leave leicester at 7, get there at 12, and i will be leaving at 1 and will get home at 11! i am REALLY looking forward to it, i haven't seen him for a year! i may have only met him that once, for that one week on holiday, but we connected and i miss him so much! he is the kind of person that i would want to marry!
maybe in 20 years if we are still in touch... who knows!
he is an amazing artist, so clever, but yea, he got bored the other day and went crazy!
we all remember pokemon!

lol! its so cool! ahh, i can't wait to see him again! he is such a good friend!

but yea, its almost 2 in the afternoon, and i am still not dressed yet! lol! nevermind, i am happily listening to incubus!

i am going to read my book - woman in white YOU SHOULD READ IT, IT IS AWESOME!

bella has come to say hello

toodles
have a nice day

0 Comments
Mood: squishy
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: a towel

xmidnightx not again, not now Aug 5th, 2005 5:34:14 pm - Subscribe

i can see it unraveling again. why do i have to have the ability to sense things that aren't to my advantage. why things that will hurt me?
this isn't going to be a repeat is it? as tears are slowly rolling down my cheeks, i can see it happening, right before me.

i don't want this, not now. im scared.

0 Comments
Mood: scared
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: clothes

xmidnightx unpleasant dreams Aug 4th, 2005 5:04:24 am - Subscribe

Last night I had a dream.

I got shot by someone vaguely familiar, yet I was unsure who the person was. He shot me about 8-16 times however I knew it was a dream, therefore I was unable to feel a thing.

I began to reason with my assasin, whilst he was torturing my friends. I knew that these people were my friends, yet I had not a clue to their identities. Soon after, he vanished. I decided to run, I couldn't physically run dar, but I had to get to somewhere safe, where there were people to look after me.

I ran as fast as my legs could carry me, but they felt like lead. It was about 2 in the morning at this time. I ran around the fence dividing the neighbours and our houses, and sprinted down their drive. I opened their porch and pounded on their front doors. My fists did not appear to be making a sound, it was extremely muffeled. So I kicked and kicked, but there was no answer.

I decided that I wan't getting an answer from the OyleOyle's so I figured that I was standing in a glass porch and if the assasin was to leave my house, he would see me. So I curled up in a ball on the floor.

Then Ayo came to the door
"He murdered me and my friends" (what bad grammar the heidi of my dreams has!)
I shouted, aware that it was very quiet and if I was too loud, he could possibly hear me. Ayo let me in, comforted me, and let me sleep on his sofa.

From the point where i was running, I no longer knew that i was dreaming, it seemed so real.

They had alot of visitors, all children. Not all relatives though, surely. Most were british, the OyleOyle's are Nigerian.
All these children stooped over me like hawks...

From this point on, all I remember is feeling scared, I think.

4 Comments
Mood: analytic
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: long skirt, new quicksilver blue V-Neck sweater

xmidnightx god damn the shoe demons Aug 3rd, 2005 7:05:38 am - Subscribe

just come home from shopping with mom'a! hehe! i was going to buy the star shoes but they looked tragic on! lol! so i have ordered some nice blue/green golas, they are cool! but i can't get them until we are back from peuto rico, which means i might be able to get some from there instead!
we had a spending spree in irish lol! mom bought herself a brown english lace skirt, which is really nice, and she bought me a really nice, pale blue, quicksilver V-neck sweater that is really nice, she also got me a blue skirt which is really nice, it was only £10! and also a purple chilli-pepper top which has a VW camper on it!

its lush! lol!
and then i bought myself woman in white as i REALLY wanted it!

so for the rest of the day, i have little plans - just horse riding, thats all! so i have about 3.5 hours to kill! lol! nevermind!

i had a very nice chocolate chip cookie after my lunch, it was lovely! it could have been a little softer though, it hurt my jaw a little bit, but not as much as the crusty cob - im not allowed them, but i really fancied one!

i really wanted to get these light blue converse today, but the whole country had sold out of size 3s! i was gutted, i had my heart set on them! well nevermind, my new shoes are nice too!

2 Comments
Mood: good
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: right now... converse, burgandy cords, studded belt, v-neck sweater, underwear, watch, black beads, my ring...

xmidnightx work, money, love and boredom Aug 2nd, 2005 2:57:41 pm - Subscribe

i have just finished eating my dinner. i had fish and chips. it was lovely!
babysitting was good - johde made me play basketball with him for like 2 hours! but it made time fly so that was ok!

hehe! and then luca wet himself...

duncan is away... meh! i was going to ask him to come riding with me tomorrow but i have riding... actually, we might be able to work around his paper round! lol! i dont know...

got paid £8 today... i guess thats ok, i didn't work for as long so i guess thats computable.

i should be hearing back from the castle soon, i really hope so - i would LOVE to work there! its such a posh restaurant! hehe!
but i was thinking, when i start back at school i will be getting minimum £38 a month from child minding, then £20 a month from my mom, then minimum £40p/m from ema, even though i think i will be getting £20/£30 so even without working at the castle i will have £100 a month which i could happily live on!

i think i am going to call duncan right now, to discuss tomorrow

we stumble through questions that you could never answer,
the barrel is loaded so go an paint your target

4 Comments
Mood: grr

xmidnightx blog 100 Aug 2nd, 2005 6:46:55 am - Subscribe

wow, i have been here for what, nearly 3 months and gotten to my 100th blog this fast! hehe! i am a confessed blogaholic! hehe

well yesterday was fun, i didn't see seb

but nevermind, i saw dunc

and i went shopping

! hehe! yesterday i said that my mom wanted me to get a skirt that wasn't black and that i would rather a nice pair of boardshorts, well i found a gorgeous pair of boardshorts for £25 and i had £26.85 in my bank so i was happy! they are really nice, they are animal, white with pink circles on, they look like bubbles, and inside some of the bubbles have different colours - so i can wear them with pink, white, yellow or blue! and i went to look for some lime green converse, because i really wanted some, so i went to schuh, where i usually buy shoes from, and they had the most amazing shoes in the world! they were EXACTLY what i wanted! hehe! they were Babycham (the make/style i wanted) and they had velcro straps (i wanted velcro straps on another pair of babychams but they didn't do them) they were the style i wanted (baseball kinda style - like chucks but not high tops) they were black (which i want) and to top it off - they have STARS on them! (I HAVE AN OVERWHELMING OBSESSION WITH STARS)

so i was happy!
i will get them this week i think - my mommy will fund them i guess, she always funds my shoes!

so today, all i have is babysitting... fun! lol! on sunday there was a McFly concert on, so i taped it because a) i was out and b) because McFly are my guilty pleasure! and i watched it today and they only showed two songs! how bollocks is that! it was all talking with the organiser! it was shit! lol!
last night my mom taped "the house of obsessive compulsives" which i will watch when i have finished what i am doing on my mp3 player so

! it looked really good! the top psychiatrist for dealing with obsessive compulsives decided that the only possibility of a cure was to put them all in a house together and see how they coped! i don't know - i will update on it later!

it takes so long to upload songs to my mp3 player! grrrrrrrr! lol!
i am REALLY loving incubus at the minute! they are awesome! i think that you don't have to be in a certain scene to actually like incubus - i reckon that anyone could say they like incubus and not get ripped for it... if you see where im coming from! they are awesome! and brandon is hot! my friend's sister named her baby after him!

whoa, its august now... everything is going so fast... this time last year i was with matt... what a mistake... i would also be on holiday - IN CORNWALL! i wish i could go back a year - there would be so many things i would do differently - i would have ended it with matt, i would have sucked the face off of matt (london) just so he would get over sarah and given him a chance at enjoying his holiday! lol! what a strange reason! but its true - i would have done!

this entry is beginning to seem quite lengthly, but i don't care! my songs haven't finished uploading yet! i will keep talking until they do! ha! we are on 28 mb of 68mb so i might be a while here folks!

i layed out all my (some unfinished) paintings for my cousins wedding yesterday, they look alright - well they will do when they are finished! whoa this song sounds familiar - what is it... make yourself - i've heard it before...

its a nice enough day today, i might change into my new shorts! they are lush! hehe! i am turning into jade - that is her word! hehe! nevermind! i love her to bits! and i miss her like sooooooooooooooooooooooooo much! i miss matt too, but hopefully i will be seeing him when i get back from peuto rico!

ahh i found it on the map now... yesterday i couldn't find it! but on the gran canaria book i found it! phew! lol! hehe! it looks nice! and there is a ranch not too far from us so thats gonna be fine for me! i can go riding! yay! i wonder if it will be spanish stylee? god damn, i need to learn spaninsh... i might have to buy a book... i'm going to buy woman in white - maybe next week though... i think i will buy a spanish book tomorrow though - then i have more time to learn! but i can't nail a spanish sounding accent - it just sounds french - im good a sounding french! and there is a water park nearby so that will be nice - and out appartment is next to a pool which is dandy! and there are lots of shops apparantly!

so im happpy with that!

this is taking so long! its pissing me off! lol! im gonna leave the computer fill stop in a mo! ill go and do my hair i guess!
dunc bought the new ffaf album, hours, yesterday - it isn't as good as casually dressed but it is ok - he put it on my mp3 for me! as well as all his incubus and some random stuff like the hives and *shhh*fightstar (just paint your target - their only good song)*shh*

5 Comments
Mood: sedated
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: jeans and pink polo shirt but i might change in a mo

xmidnightx moo-ha-ha Aug 1st, 2005 4:56:16 am - Subscribe

why hallo there dear friend! i haven't updated you since... yesterday morning! how selfish of me! lol!

wooo orlaith left BB, but now kinga is in - i don't know which is worse? and what kind of name is kinga - im sure it isn't polish!

well yesterday i hung out with duncan! yay! it was fun! and i'm hanging out with him again today! i was supposed to be seeing seb today but there is no need now! because my CD burner has died so i am having to email him 39 photos! one batch has sent - two more batches are sending! i have sent the batch of frankie, and the batches of jon-luc and cliff photos are in movement! so that leaves a batch of lacosai pictures, seb pics and the movies!*thumbs up*

so today my mom has told me to look for a skirt which isn't black... but i might just look for some board shorts or something like that instead! there is a higher chance of me actually wearing them again!

wow im chatting to lee, its so nice to talk to him! i love him to bits! why wouldn't i, he has adopted me as his little sister!

yesterday we watched blackadder... i think thats about all we did! fun! hehe! nah it was really!

these pictures are taking ages! i still have to do my hair, change my bed, do the washing up! terrible!

3 Comments
Mood: perky
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: usual emo stuff

xmidnightx shut up you \"emo fag\" - how immature Jul 31st, 2005 3:44:15 am - Subscribe

yesterday, i got called an 'emo fag' - do i look like an emo cigarette? i didn't think so! and it was by a filfy goffic too!
it proves that whatever is hot in america - they just try to be like it over here! 'emo fag' is most definately an american phrase, seeing as 'emo' originated from america and moved over here (big time) about 6 months ago (where as people like josh and i have been into it since like... upto 2 years ago...) and the term 'fag' is not used as an offensive word, but slang for a cigarette! darn rat kids! i didn't even do anything to deserve being called something so immature, i was just sitting on the grass! it was stoopid! but hey, kids today will never learn!
well i have to go see my darling boyfriend now!

yay! hehe! i luuuuuuuuuuurve him!

3 Comments
Mood: emo faggish!
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: burgand cords, atticus burdie top, studded belt (YAY I HAVE IT BACK!) converse, meh!

xmidnightx webcamxwhore part 3 Jul 30th, 2005 7:53:14 am - Subscribe

this is becoming silly, i know! but i can't help it!
BOREDOM = WEBCAM = LOTS OF PHOTOS!
im not vain... honest! i just like taking photos! and i have nothing else to take them of!

how cute is that! my gorgeous kitty!

how sweet is that one!

i feel bad for being kinda vain now! nevermind... i was bored! and i feel more confident now!

7 Comments
Mood: attractive
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: quicksilver jeans, white shirt with the astros are out of this world tee on top avec converse

xmidnightx whoreible - what a dudey word Jul 29th, 2005 10:14:32 am - Subscribe

your lipstick his collar don't bother angel
i know exactly what goes on...

i am on a TBS spreeeeeee! i can't help it, i am again, in love! i am infatuated... again! lol! i thought my phase had passes, but, alas, it hasn't! nevermind! they make me happpppppy!

ahh im so hyper! i bought myself some beaded bracelets today! they are perdy! lol! black beads! i have been after some for a while so i am happy, my wrist is no longer bare (except my watch, which looked oh so lonely!)

ahh duncan is home tomorrow - he doesn't know about my radical hair change ness! lol! i was going to dye it pink on his return but i think i shall keep it au natural for now! lol! weeeeeeeeeee! im happy!

if you havent already check out my http://www.aeonity.com/xmidnightx/blog/18519 they are new pictures and they are rad so that cool!

go see... NOW *points finger*

i am soooooo hyper... you mich have been able to tell...
damn! its 4:10... thats late! i thought it was like 2! i don't think i woke up late... 10 isn't late right? well i guess it is...

nevermind! lol! dinner time soon! i think my mom has made pie, yay! i love pie!

i got it bad, i got it bad, i got it bad, i got it baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad

i swear, all you americans and you silly spellings, it best not affect my school work! spelling colour - color and centre - center! lol! why can't HTML work in english too! evilness! nah, i love you americans really! *nods* *offers a huggle*

i have to wear a silly contraption in my mouth... its not as bad as the old one, i can actually keep it in without gagging! lol! so its all good, and you can't tell that much that i am wearing it, i mean i can't shut my mouth and when i speak, i sound like a deaf person, no offence to deaf people! they rock, i would hate to be deaf - i would die without music! lol! poor darlings! but sign language is proper awesome! i would love to learn it!

2 Comments
Mood: HYPER *jumps*
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: see todays other blogs

xmidnightx webcamxwhore... again... Jul 29th, 2005 9:44:46 am - Subscribe

ok, so i got a little carried away... again... but i wanted some nice photos of me and my new haircut! ahhh i like my hair! its so me!

2 Comments
Mood: photographic
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: black cords, white shirt, with smallville elementary top over it!

xmidnightx hehehe, the new me! come see! Jul 29th, 2005 6:04:27 am - Subscribe

so i got my hair cut yesterday, it took an hour and a half! :| nevermind, it looked so good yesterday! i love it! but this morning, i could not get it right! i need new straigheners, mine are big clunky ones and i need some thin ones now my hair is so short! nevermind, i will post some pictures of my hair yesterday, because today, it is less... good!

i hope i don't look too bad... well i don't care - i like it!

3 Comments
Mood: impish
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: black cords, white shirt, with smallville elementary top over it!

xmidnightx boredom, worries and dreams Jul 27th, 2005 6:45:50 am - Subscribe

so today is wednesday (4 more days...) dunc gets home in 3 days, yay! i really need to sort some things out with him... im really starting to get scared... why now, why whilst he is on holiday... this is awefull... i don't knoe what i am going to do...

today, i have no plans, except to not stuff my face... i binge far too often when i am not at school. school gives me structure, it gives me something to focus on so that i am not constantly thinking... hmm... i could eat x right now. the school food is so horrible so its great, i only need eat once a day. i can't wait to get back to school. how geeky do i sound!

no riding this evening, the horses are on holiday - how fucked up is that! nevermind... i saw this chav on the bus who helps out at riding today, she is such a chav! and she lives in braunstone... poor lass (gawd how northern do i sound!)

look at me, im thinking about lunch and im already full from breakfast! i am so pathetic - i really need to stop binging... i don't even know why i do it

last night i dreamt that i took a pregnancy test and it turned out to be negative... god help me, i can't be though, surely, it's never split, we are always carefull... oh gawd why! i hope i come on soon...

im scared

3 Comments
Mood: hollow
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: jack skellington top and jeans

xmidnightx shleepy Jul 26th, 2005 4:55:45 pm - Subscribe

my kemal is up for eviction

! noooooooo! he best not go! i love him, he's so cool walking around in his stilletoes! lol!
today, as the reward for the artistic task, they were given a kitten to play with for an hour - it was so adoreable! i wanted it! hehe! it was all grey and fluffy!

so now i am bored, i might go to bed sometime soon, i don't know yet...! meh! i don't think there is anything else on TV so there really isn't much keeping me up! nevermind...

new site, photograpic...

0 Comments
Mood: shleepy
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: clothes my darling, clothes

xmidnightx ribbit Jul 26th, 2005 1:57:26 pm - Subscribe

well im back from my first day babysitting. the children were johde (7), luca (5) and laine (10m) they were sweet! it wasn't too bad, the older boys just play fought most of the time, and laine was really tired, he fell asleep on me, bless him!
i haven't watched BB for a while now, i must watch it this evening, see whats going on in the house! lol! i'm so sad! nevermind, i don't care

ahh i just had a gorgeous orange! it was really tasty! im trying to eat more fruit these days, it mostly consists of grapes, cherries, oranges and melon! meh! nevermind!

duncan is home in...*thinks*... 4 days! yay! i really need to talk to him... i am really worried about something, something VERY important... which, if it turns out to be, i will be in big trouble...
but anyhoo, im looking forward to seeing him! i have missed him!

i'm tired, eastenders is on, and i really can't be bothered to watch it, there is 10 mins left, so i have 10 mins i have to waste before i can watch something else! i hate how my mom watches soaps religiously!

laney and pete, ahh im gonna miss them when i am all alone in school next year... *sobs*

1 Comments
Mood: surreal
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: long skirt, lime green spaghetti top, black zip through and blue fluffy socks because im freeeeeeeeezing!

xmidnightx lacosai Jul 26th, 2005 5:49:34 am - Subscribe

lacosai were really good last night! i got there at about 7:45, was greeted by jon-luc. w stood and just chatted for ages! well, until they went on stage! their set was goood! lol! i got loads of photos, most of them were fab! hehe! afterwards, i hung out with the band - as i was on my own, they didn't seem to mind! cliff was so eager for a spliff, so when random logic came on, we left! we sat outside, frankie and cliff wouldn't let me sit on the amp - I HAD A MINI SKIRT ON AND THEY MADE ME SIT CROSS LEGGED ON THE FLOOR! nevermind, i made sure i didn't flash anyone! lol! they all smoked the spliff, i sat imbetween jon-luc and seb, so they were the only people i really spoke to then! seb was really cool, we got on really well! hes a dude! they were all 14! i thought seb was a year older than me! :| lol! he's two years younger!!! i was astonished! lol but anyway, he was cool! i look forward to seeing him again, he's a dude! lol!
they are playing again on the 10th august in a battle of the bands at the charlotte which will be cool! hehe! can't wait! hehe!
www.lacosai.tk
check it out!

3 Comments
Mood: HYPER!
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: dressing gown and towel on my head!

xmidnightx attention all readers! Jul 25th, 2005 11:33:37 am - Subscribe

does my hair look ok? going to a show - but i want to look nice!
apologies for the vanity - theres no1 home and i need to know whethere or not to change my hair?

gotta wear alot of stars today, need to live up to my name for jon-luc, he hasn't yet seen me in all my starry glory and i need to prove it to him! lol!

5 Comments
Mood: good - mildly hyperactive
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: suadey skirt, b&w starry top, doc martens, blazer

xmidnightx hello there all! Jul 25th, 2005 8:56:26 am - Subscribe

hello there blog and blog readers!
i hope you are having a lovely day!

today has been ok, even though it is only 2:30 in the afternoon! got up at 10, went shopping - bought some knickers... there cool, some have spots on, and some have... dun dun duuuuun, STARS on

but then everything of mine has stars on! and i bought a subway - damnit those sandwhiches are DIVINE! fast food and good for you!

im going to go and see jon-lucs band play this evening - people are never online when yo u need them! i needed to speak to him to see what time they are on! damnit! well 7 seemed to ring a bell so i will go for 7 i guess, i can wait! however i shall be on my lonesome, gracie is on holiday!

! never mind - its not like im not used to it! i shall take my best friend - my camera! hehe! ooh - they are scheduled at 8!

im curently pondeing over how to do my hair - my straightners are on, i think i will flip it out - i really want to do it differently! i am so bored with it right now! short on thursday!

i start work tomorrow! yeehaw! gotta go, parkes wants me to revamp something!

0 Comments
Mood: evil
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: q\'silver jeans, billabong shirt

xmidnightx steam rollers, week planners and shivering equines! Jul 24th, 2005 3:46:36 pm - Subscribe

week plan... hopefully

monday
go swimming (if i don't come on)
possibly do some retail therapy to buy a new belt and a new collar for my kitty

go see lacosai play at the shed

tuesday
make self look very nice but staying casual as i have my first day babysitting MUST MAKE EXCELLENT IMPRESSION
pick up photos and drop them off at rogers

wenesday
i don't think i have any plans for wednesday, i might arrange to meet up with dave or chris, OR laney and pete!

thursday
same as wednesday, no plans - try and meet up with long lost friends again!

friday
take book back to library, i really can't get into it
go into the city library to look for wilkie collins - woman in white

saturday
meet selina at 1, at clock tower
welcome duncan home - over the internet though i guess
watch scream2

sunday
try to see duncan, if he isn't too busy
possibly see inca, luna, miki and morag

i saw the horses today, miki was a dick, as usual - lee wants him seperated now *amen* luna didn't want to see me and inca came trotting right up to me! bless her! but she had something wrong with her! she kept pawing the ground and waving her head around, like she had an itch that she just couldn't scratch, then she reared at me...

i mean, she only came about 2ft off the ground, but i don't know why she did it, it was like she was warning me of something

no idea!

so on my way back, roger gave me a lift in the 75tonne vibrating roller, and woo i got to drive it! yay! it was cool, but my steering was a little kaput! lol! a little wobbly, down to the fact i didn't know which way i was turning the wheel! it was fun though, not to mention warm and dry!

0 Comments
Mood: cold
..today.midnight.is.wearing..: same as earlier