Date: Sep 27th, 2005 12:33:57 pm - Subscribe
Mood: nervous wreck
music: the sounds of my class

Sleep has pretty much been the only thing on my mind today. >>; Maybe that's because I stayed up all night, but oh well. So far in today's events!:

Algebra II - Got to sleep because everyone was taking a test and I didn't have to. ^-^ Hoorah.

Peer Tutoring - Made the perilous, exhausting trek over to the elementary school to help the EC class. I love those kids.

Bible as History - I'm currently in this class. And I already finished my paper for the class. I guess I got in the writing mood.

But, I'm a nervous wreck anyway. I want to talk to Pat when I get home, to make sure his flight was okay and everything. I really, really want to talk to him now. Stupid school and their blocked e-mail.

Anyway, bell's going to ring. I'll update later, maybe.
Fuck Offs (0)

...barbie mutilation...
Date: Jul 20th, 2005 3:26:04 am - Subscribe
Mood: wasted
music: Savage Garden - This Side of Me

New url. Nice. Now people can stop wangsting about me being an emo because of my blog site.

Now, about the subject of this lovely update. Barbie mutilation. I was fairly sure that all of my barbies had been beheaded on July 4th's in the past. Considering I enjoy lighting fire crackers in them... But, it turns out a handful of them remained unscathed and were packed away into crates. Upon discovering this, my friend and I decided that they would escape unscathed no longer. With sharpees, cheap Barbie clothes, scraps of cloth, and scissors we created a line of fucked up barbies that Samantha would like to sell on E-bay. Some are even high school cliches (emo, punk, goth, etc). I'll see about posting pictures of them up sometime.

I was given two dresses by Sammy, and she's trying to force me into the pageant with her this year... Fat chance -there-. You'll never see me in a pageant. Ever. People have their favorites, and that doesn't change. You never see someone who isn't popular win a pageant. Not at my school, anyway. So I won't be entering.

I dropped by Sarah's house today to try to retrieve my DNAngel DVDs, but she wasn't home. So I'll have to get them another time. My collection feels incomplete without them. At any rate. I think that's all I have to say.

I watched Phantom of the Opera. It was excellent, and I've heard that the play is even better. Now I really want to see it. I'll get around to it someday when I have the money to afford it.

Phantom of the Opera, Don't Fear the Reaper, and Losing My Religion are the three songs that I'm currently obsessed with. I hate the Dukes of Hazzard - it makes the South seem much more stupid than it is. After all, I am from the South, but there is no way that I am that... Disgraceful.

I won't get into that. I should probably -try- to get some sleep soon. And lets hope this time I don't go fully clothed down to my knee-high combat boots.
Fuck Offs (0)

...i think i thought i saw you try...
Date: Jul 11th, 2005 8:24:31 am - Subscribe
Mood: feeling old
music: R.E.M. - Losing My Religion

Don't you hate it when you get obsessed with a song and you can't stop listening to it? That's how I am right now with the song "Losing My Religion" by R.E.M. It's a really cool song... And it's kind of easy to connect to when I think back over some points in my life.

The slip that brought me
to my knees, failed
What if all these fantasies
Come flailing aground

That takes me back to two times in my life. When my uncle and grandfather died and when Nick broke up with me. Both experiences spiralled me into a depression I could barely claw myself out of. I don't regret anything in my life... But if I could go back and changed the things that happened, the things that I did those two times. I would. I think those are the only two times I have ever questioned my religion, and I failed the goals that I made for myself.

...Wow. XD I just got asked if I was old. What the crap.

"You're old aren't you? XP"
"I am not. XD I'm sixteen. Don't you dare insinuate that's old. What about you? *poke:: How old are you?"
"Sixteen XP But my friends don't come over at insane hours just because of work."

As I was explaining to her that I had to get offline because my friend came over. XD I feel a little insulted.

I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

This song... It fits so close-knitted to my past. It almost frightens me. At any rate. This is all I have to say for the update. It was just a bunch of rambling.
Fuck Offs (2)

...i will forgive...i won\'t forget...
Date: Jul 4th, 2005 11:18:41 pm - Subscribe
Mood: pissed off
music: Papa Roach - Scars

Kate is pissing me off, seriously. If she tries to point out one more of my faults to my mother I'm going to beat her. For some reason, which to me is still unknown, she is angry with me. I've actually narrowed it down to two reasons:

1. She knows I'm right about her boyfriend TJ being an ass and ignoring her.
2. She's jealous as hell because Sammy and I have more in common than she does with me.

Either reason is a stupid excuse to be taking out the brunt of her anger on me.

Mm, lets see what else is on my mind, shall we? Oh! I know. All of my friends are conversing with my ex who made my life a living HELL for six months until he finally backed off with a threat from the police. He apologized to them... Let's just ignore the fact that I was put through the most of his shit and I still haven't gotten a single "sorry I ruined you life". I don't expect it in person since he isn't allowed to get near me, but the LEAST he could do is send it through one of my friends.

God. Right now I'm just really pissed the fuck OFF. Rob needs to get back from the beach soon so I can hang out with him. He'll put me in a better mood than I'm in now. -_-

Some fourth of July this turned out to be. Anniversary of the break up and he still manages you fuck my life up through my friends.

Kate, I thought you fucking cared about me more than that. So much for being sisters, eh?

Fuck out.

...i will forgive...
...but I won't forget...
Fuck Offs (1)

...hate yourself...you\'re all alone...
Date: Jul 4th, 2005 9:00:28 am - Subscribe
Mood: nocturnal
music: Papa Roach - Getting Away With Murder

Sammy and Kate spent the night and we stayed up most of the night playing Trivial Pursuit 90s. Sammy went to sleep, but Kate stayed up with me the whole night because she couldn't sleep.

We had an interesting conversation early this morning with Anna before she got off for bed.

An example:


If you have no idea what that is, don't ask. I'm not going to shatter the naive shell that you are encased in. Then again, if you're that naive, what the fuck are you doing reading my blog? Go away. Save yourself from certain destruction.

Went swimming at around 6:30 and then came back in to eat and play Spuno (don't ask) with Kate until Sammy woke up. She's still asleep but we're not playing anymore because Kate got pissy about my winning streak. Also told me I could be annoying which further strengthens my belief of what I posted two entries ago.

Still depressed about the stuff that's two entries ago. Check it out if you really wanna know.

Nothing more to say, I guess.
Fuck out.

...hate yourself...
...you're all alone...
Fuck Offs (1)

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