imaginary's Blog

Freedom.
Date: Jun 14th, 2008 5:21:55 pm - Subscribe
Mood: feeling good.


It bothers me that I don't feel I can write as freely here as I once could. I've already done some damage by forgetting that words (sometimes especially mine) can be very powerful. I don't want to cause anyone pain.

But I still want to write. And I like Aeonity a lot, and I don't want to make a new blog. This is where my past is as well. And if I make them all private entries, I'll never receive any reflection by others. So it's frustrating. I suppose I will continue to write cryptically until I can be sure of things.

Anyway - my graduation turned out exceedingly well. And as much as I worried and ranted about it, the whole day was exciting and fun and beautiful. I felt beautiful. And confident, and desired. Even days afterwards I floated on this feeling, and even right now (more than a week later) it remains in me.

Also, I figured out some stuff. I can't be uninhibited in discussing it here, but it was a pretty nice revelation. I'm hoping yet more good will come of it. It actually kind of frustrates me that I can't write about it... hmmm.

I'd like to employ this space for a brief meditation on the birth control pill, and how it does not mix well with me. I realized this in the shower a few minutes ago, but I've been not taking it for about three months now, and I am a lot improved. It did help a lot while I was taking it, because it balanced everything out in my system. But now I'm off it. And suddenly I am happier. My moods are a lot more static and less extreme, making me a lot happier as a whole. My skin is clearer. I'm losing weight again. I eat more regularly, and even sleep more (but I don't think that is directly related. It's probably more as a result of everything else.) So, without delving too deeply into my medical life, I just wanted to point out that sometimes messing around with the human body can make you a lot less happy than leaving it to do its own thing.

And with that, I depart.
Comments: (0)

Image Verification:

Anonymous guest, why not register, or login now.