Pained...
Date: Dec 30th, 2004 7:14:59 am - Subscribe
Mood: reminiscent
Faintly recalling a melody: Shongak shongak
I feel...different.
Dreams still come and go, and with their fleeting I yearn to be among them every waking hour that I have. I wish to hasten time. So days may pass by. So every heartbeat that I feel lessen. As with each and every pounding I feel pain coursing through me...telling me I'm alive...and telling me that even in a crowd, I am alone...
So very alone...
My mistress would find it amusing though that I, on my part, no longer follow much of what she leads. I have, in a way, found that I need not fall for everything that she leads me to. At least for now...now when everything is quiet and I am away...
I do not even remember her face. Yet her voice still resonate within. Faint recollection of what was...
Yet still I am alone...sigh...
Comments: (0)
A bit more random than before
Date: Dec 27th, 2004 11:23:44 am - Subscribe
Mood: desolate
Faintly recalling a melody: Aan' allein
Ok, now that I've settled in my house and vacation fever is slowly killing me, I'd have to say that life alone isn't so bad. But I gues I have no choice do I? Fate is a mistress that rides you till you wear down.
Come to think of it, I've been alone for more than what? All my life? But I never really bothered to even think why, I never got used to it...
Anyway, my mom's abroad and I don't know if I feel something for another person apart from my immediate family.
Hmmm... On a brighter note, I've just concluded that I am doomed to repeat history with the way things are going in my life. Considering my past background in relationships with my friends, loneliness, despair and desolation... I'd need to... change...
Somehow, I regret waking up in the morning. I always loved sleeping. Why did it have to end? Dreams are the only things that keep me going day after day, knowing that at the end, I can sleep again and I can LIVE...
...only to wake up...alone...and feeling more random as the seconds pass me by...
Comments: (0)
NSG...egad!
Date: Nov 17th, 2004 2:58:42 pm - Subscribe
Mood: whoopie
Faintly recalling a melody: Necrophilicus Sexus Geriatricus
Geez man...who the hell would create a fraternity named Necrophilicus Sexus Geriatricus...or NSG for short...WHAT THE HELL is wrong with the world?!~
....
Hmmm...Campfire cooked hotdogs taste kinda neat add half cooked corned beef...haaaa.... jungle training is fun... even if you smell like coal smoke and your hand nearly burned off...I liked every moment of it...^_^
Its not gourmet class food, but I'd eat that rather than eating alone..ne?
....
Fate eased down a little and sorta gave me a backrub today saying that...what was it?
I'd be rich and I'd love my wife but my son would kill me....
That sucked...but then what other damn choice do I have... 2 out of 3 is not that bad... 
Comments: (0)
Confused and alone
Date: Nov 10th, 2004 2:04:24 pm - Subscribe
Mood: random
Faintly recalling a melody: Weeeeoooow~
Hmm...I wonder if circumstance would mind if I smiled and said, "Stop messing with me..." in a very nice manner?
I don't really mind having to go through the drudgery of actually living my life but sometimes fate would just butt in and throw some random thought in your head making you feel...well...random. I mean...can I really separate myself from fate and actually be the one to decide what actually happens to me?
Sometimes though, I get to thinking that I just want to stop and listen to the things I want to listen and tell someone what I really feel or spontaneously shout, "Weeeeoooow~" in the MRT.
Look, I'm not sour graping about my lot in life, but I just want to at least...well...I don't know what I want...I know I can't really mess with other people's lives to make my life more comfortable. It''s unethical to say the least. Ok...so I am sour graping... I hate feeling confused...
....
Hmmm...on the lighter side, I have formally placed my foot (my right foot, not my wrong one) forward to achieving journalistic professionalism. Heh. 2nd midterm...how many more to go? 4 more and I graduate...formally becoming a journ grad and launching myself into a world of intrigue and high-hopes-smashing reality. I love the world. 
Comments: (0)