No Air
Date: May 7th, 2008 2:17:04 am - Subscribe
Mood: glum
So I should be happy, what with me graduating just shy of 4 days, but I can't help but to find myself in a dismal mood, especially within the last 24 hours.
Job hunting has become a bit of a disappointment and I'm starting to seriously lose faith in any qualifications that I thought I originally possessed. Sometimes I just wish I could snap my fingers and change my qualifications, or magically receive the money I need to take care of bills. This situation will have to be taken care of eventually.
My car has been giving me the shits lately (well, not literally, not in the sense of the bathroom), but I'm about fed up with dealing with it. I refuse to put anymore money into it. It's just going to have to hang-on until I replace it, which if things go well will be towards the end o the summer.
The last week has been a whirlwind. I've been in so many places that I've lost track of what day it is. I had a lot of unfinished business to take care of here there and everywhere and now that I've had about 12 hours of "peaceful environment", Greenville awaits me. I've been done with finals since the last day of classes (last week), but there are still a few loose ends that need to be tended to before I walk across that stage.
I'm starting to regret being so forgiving of people because it is starting to bite me in the ass. Bottom line I'm too nice, I forgive too easily and I need to grow a back bone. No details up here, just know that the summer will serve as theory for me. My heart has been twisted up enough this year, it needs to recover.
There's been one situation that I think has contributed to all of this up and down behavior and it's my own fault for refueling it. I'm just confused as to how to feel or what exactly to feel. I can't read signs; it's becoming too foggy to tell.
Hopefully things will work out right. I know this makes no sense and maybe it's not supposed to since I'm rambling on...
Maybe tomorrow will be better.
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