Romeo and Juliet...?
Date: Nov 21st, 2006 10:33:51 am - Subscribe
Mood: Thinking
So answer me this...how can you love someone so much, and hate them all at the same time?? How can I miss them but when they are near want them gone. A part of me has lost all the feelings I had, but the other part of me still has them, and it is driving me nuts. Plus I am lonely. It has been so long since I have been close to anyone, so is it desperation?
The reason for such questions is because Chris came over last night. He picked me up from work and we hung out till about 10. It was nice, but at the same time I wanted him to leave. A lot of bad things happened between us and a part of me cannot forgive him. I am trying. I am mostly trying to be friends for our sons sake. I want him to know that his mother and father have a good relationship, even if it is not a romantic relationship.
So if you are curious as to what we did last night, I shall tell you. If you are not curious, I will tell you anyways. He brought the Adam Sandler movie "Click" over. It was pretty good. I hadn't seen it before, and it kind of made me cry. I won't say why for those of you who have not seen it. I also made him watch a couple of episodes of Gilmore Girls that I have on DVD. First season, I love it.
I really am like the Gilmore Girls, its funny. I am 90% coffee and 10% oxygen. I am fast paced, talk a lot and I tend to banter. I also tend to ramble in my banter, which confuses people. However, they live in this amazing small town, and I don't.
I want to live in a town like that. I want to know everyone and everything. I want my town to do fun quirky events and have traditions. Right now the only tradition my town has is building useless business on precious farmland and making my city look like a California beach city! I live in Idaho, that's just not right!
I have been thinking of moving though. To CT, which oddly enough is where Gilmore Girls are supposed to be from. Didn't know that though when I made that decision. I have never been to the east coast, I have only lived in the Northwest. I think the change would be interesting and I love what I have seen over there. I should look into the economy and things like that. Maybe I can get a job transfer. That would give me time to save up and research. Chris wants to come too. I think that maybe thats a good idea. That would take a lot of pressure off. His friends, my mother, and random people seem to be an influence on his.
Well I need to get some work done, but I will try to write more later.
Signing off~
Jocelyn
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