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the end is near

Jun 1st, 2005 2:03:54 pm - Subscribe

its here!!
its so close!

today was better. it just didn't drag like it usuallly did.

fud signed my yearbook.
that is so effing cool. ha!

um, yes, and i will infact be moving.

so bud can screw off at shopko....lol
jk...although...haha nevermind


that is weird though...who gets off in the intimates department at shopko? honestly?!?
Mood: trippy
excellent song: jack johnson- belle
.(0) comments.

the last few days

May 31st, 2005 9:56:22 am - Subscribe


the last few days
have quickly flown by
the worries i've had
were forgotten
but only temporarily
i returned yesterday
to pick up the pain
that i left behind
only to plan
a way to escape
the time is near, the waiting is
almost done.
things are looking up
and my feet are firmly planted on the ground
you said things were going to be different
things really haven't changed
except i have hope
where once i had dismay
i wish to leave behind my anger
and put a stop to this disease
the gloominess inside that's
slowly taking over me.
Mood: wise
excellent song: soft- kings of leon
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windswept

May 25th, 2005 1:59:29 pm - Subscribe

windswept
that's how i feel
sitting in front of the damn fan
my hair is being gently blown into my face
it makes me feel calm
even though the tv shows pictures of another distaster, a sick baby, a monster fish
i wish the fan, could blow my troubles away
take away all the reasons why i dont care
i need to care
but i don't see a point.
all my years are over, the classroom door is closing
my future remains a question mark.
i know what i want, but how do i acheive
inner serenity
the peace of wise men, and long ruled kings
i want the calmness of an old woman in her prime
who only worries about the day she dies
the fact remains, that i'm so young
and troubled by outer forces
who can blame my longing for knowledge
that remains out of my grasp.
Mood: bothered
excellent song: no sugar tonight- the guess who
.(1) comments.

the light at the end of the tunnel

May 24th, 2005 2:04:16 pm - Subscribe

its done
and over
the feeling is gone
i've distanced myself


in other words, i broke up with my boyfriend.

you should applaud me, it was a big step.


thanks for the comments on my last blog.


Mood: bewitched
excellent song: the reflex- duran duran
.(2) comments.

the hole

May 23rd, 2005 1:59:50 pm - Subscribe


so i'm going to a counselor
to try to help me cope
my mom thinks i need to talk
to get emotions out
inside myself, i'm drowning
my friends are at the surface
screaming that they care
but its only me who i can help
and i'm frustrated with saying
"i don't care"
lack of sleep, and always down
seem to be my new M.O.
its sick, and sad, but i can't help
the things i think of, or do.
i long for a place
distant and far
and starry night, with warm breezes
clearly not this place where i sit
with a frown upon my lips
a furrowed brow
"this place suffocates
and my heart yearns me on"
words of a song held true and dear
remind me of a person once held near
but now a broken heart ensues
and i cannot endure
the pain i feel
the pain that's shared
with the one i still love.
Mood: uninspired
excellent song: chariot- gavin degraw
.(3) comments.

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