just_jess Aeonity Blog

tears that have got to fall

Wed, 21 Sep 2005 11:28:10 -0500

the news just keeps on coming. the drowning feeling is back, something i can't control...the feeling that the world is collapsing on you, pressing down on your chest, slowly sucking the life out of you. i was told that it wasn't working out between us, and she told me i needed to leave. she wasn't kicking me out, but apparently i have issues.... Read More

the terrifying nature of my life

Mon, 19 Sep 2005 12:50:46 -0500

things have got to change. but they seem to be constant. constant in sorrow, in tears, in anger, in not belonging. i'm not sure what to do anymore, or who to turn to. the person who i talk to the most wants something that i can't give them, and it saddens me that i don't have the courage to tell them. i have to drive to through the citie... Read More

ew, and yuck.

Mon, 12 Sep 2005 09:17:31 -0500

so saturday i went out to dinner with Benny and his dad, and his dad's girlfriend, and her daughter, Annie. that was traumatic in itself, but apparently his dad think "i'm gold" sunday i worked all fricken day in grill, and it sucked ass so hard core. then i went home and watched the vikings almost win, but then they got an interception and... Read More

isn\'t it funny...

Tue, 06 Sep 2005 22:53:39 -0500

...how life can take a turn? i'm dating Benny, finally after months...almost a year. i feel like a horrible person though. its just wrong, and sad at the same time. i just feel like i'm stretched to my limits right now. i'm getting a cold, and i don't know how to act around Ben. its sad and strange and weird. J.... Read More

cloudy days

Thu, 25 Aug 2005 23:37:25 -0500

ok, so guess who just got sick of her boyfriend? i swear its like a disease...i got out with them for a certain period of time...then, BOOM, Jes doesn't like them anymore. and the sad thing is, i don't even feel bad. this is why i'm scared to start anything with anybody else...maybe i'm broken on the inside. oy. and i'm currently not li... Read More

the sun.

Mon, 22 Aug 2005 19:57:08 -0500

my brothers are over here, and rolling around on the floor next to me, doing kindergarten-like gymnastics...i wish i could warp back to their age for a day, they have it so easy, they don't even know. if i was ben's age again, i would tell someone how i felt about them...yes, yall, i regret not doing that. but. i also regret what i did th... Read More

blackouts and bitchouts

Sun, 21 Aug 2005 16:26:35 -0500

so yesterday morning, i woke up at 630 to get ready for work, and when i was brushing my teeth, i started shaking, and then there was a cold sweat that i had, my vision blurred, and i felt so faint...it scared the shit out of me. not to mention the stabbing pains in my gut that pretty much raped me all day. it sucked. then i got bitched out b... Read More

don\'t lie

Fri, 19 Aug 2005 18:13:27 -0500

so i've been watching tv all day. this is a sad state of affairs. i come back into town to work, and they don't give me any hours. ugh. i may as well just go back over to the lake with barney, because at least he misses me. i've been hanging out with my mom, and i'm glad because we haven't seen each other all summer. and apparently my cell ph... Read More

driving habits

Wed, 17 Aug 2005 09:37:52 -0500

ok, so my driving habits aren't that bad are they? last night my mom tells me that they suck, and someone that i know hates getting into a car with me because of how i drive. that hurt. i've been clean for accidents since september of last year, that's almost a whole year. what a way to kick off the rest of my summer...um, not. so tell me som... Read More

hey yall, i\'m back!!

Tue, 16 Aug 2005 16:11:19 -0500

hi guys!! did you miss me? i sure missed yall! last night was my first official night back in town and i hung out with manda, dustin, brita and sean. it was a blast. we went and saw the skeleton key...wow, it was good. anyway, that's about it. IM me!! or email me! Love, Jes... Read More