finding middle ground
Date: Jun 20th, 2008 1:54:22 am - Subscribe
Mood: exasperated
My daughter just turned 18 and she graduated high school less than 3 weeks ago. She also had a baby last November. (We were disappointed, but since I was only 19 when I had her, I couldn't really get mad at her.) We did lay down a few ground rules, though - as long as she lived here, we still had to know where she was staying by 10 pm if she wasn't staying at home and she still had to pull her share of the chores. Considering we never even considered making her pay rent, I felt that was fair. She didn't.
She left home on Saturday (with the baby, it's not like she left her here) and told me she was staying at her dad's. She called me on Monday and told me that she would be home on Wednesday, after work. She stopped by on Wednesday to collect a few of her things (while I was at work) and I haven't seen or heard from her since.
I don't know where she spent last night, but Ii do know that she stopped by again today to grab a few more of her things. And again didn't bother to tell us where she was spending the night tonight - and it's nearly 10 again.
I find this unacceptable. A quick phone call to say she is staying at her dad's again would have smoothed things over, but this is now two days in a row ignoring the rules, which are less than two weeks old.
I can't in good conscience kick her out - she only works part time and her boyfriend doesn't have a real job (he finally started a commission based job but hadn't made anything last I heard), so it's not like they can live on their own. And I'm not comfortable kicking her out to live on welfare, because I'm sure if I do, she'll never go to college (even though she has a scholarship that will pay for at least an associates degree at the community college).
So that's my dilemma - I can't kick her out but I can't have her doing whatever she wants to do, ignoring the rules, and breaking my heart. (I have a younger boy at home and if I let her do this, there is no way I will be able to enforce the rules with him.)
Any ideas on how I can find some middle ground?
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aaaah! a fresh start
Date: Jun 17th, 2008 12:49:30 am - Subscribe
Mood: hopeful
a chance to post, relatively anonymously, in a forum my friends aren't using yet.
a chance to post what's on my mind without worrying that others might be offended.
a chance to work my thoughts out, to unload my emotions, to just be me with no repercussions.
how can a girl say no!?!
Comments: (1)