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lost_souls Hmmm. - Subscribe
I heard you crying last night. Sobbing. Through the floor. Or ceiling. However you want to look at it. I'm worried about you. Are you okay? You could talk to me if you wanted to. Fuck, how could you trust me? That's probably what you're thinking. I dunno. I'm just worried.








I'm still not sure what happened.
He held my heart for over 3 years, having a girlfriend the entire time.
I got over him.
And now I've fallen for someone who lives 300 miles away.
I think I'd almost prefer the first.


Quote:
When the music filled with glorious eruptions of sound swirls around you, you are transported out of reality into a place that transcends time. Then, there is no audience, no auditorium, no critics, no officials to please or displease. There is no past to revive or regret, no future to plan or pursue. There is only the imperative the music creates.
0 Comments
Mood: unsure

lost_souls Yikes. Sep 14th, 2006 8:02:03 pm - Subscribe
Since when did school, cross-country, and guitar = one seriously overwhelmed girl?

And why did I not have a problem with it last year?




I'm crying right now, the mascara running down my face. Literally.
I thought I had decided to quit cross-country tomorrow until I called my mom. She seemed to disagree, though I'm sure she was just playing devil's advocate. But it made me think again, even though thinking about it is all I've been doing for the past 48 hours while being unable to sleep.
Positives?? Well, I have a lot of fun, most of the time. I love my teammates. It's just so much fun at practice and stuff. And I stay in shape.
Negatives?? My bursitis of the hip has returned, practice is leaving me exhausted, it is leaving me with zero time for anything else (like my guitar - which I'd really love to get better at), and I'm having breathing problems which don't seem to be helped by an inhaler.
Which outweighs the other?
I need somebody to tell me what to do, because I can't make the decision. But I have to by tomorrow 5th period. And if I do decide to quit, I don't think I can tell my coach without crying.

Damn it.
I don't know what to do.
And I feel like shit, so it's not helping.
3 Comments
Mood: overwhelmed
Sounds Heard: The Kill - 30 Seconds To Mars

lost_souls I did it. It's done. Sep 15th, 2006 4:59:40 pm - Subscribe
Thanks for all of the comments and advice and whatnot.

So I'm definitely in a better mood today. I did it. I quit. Sort of. I won't be running anymore, but my coach said that I could still come to the meets to either cheer them on or help her with the times at the finish line. So we'll see. I saw her later in the hall and said that I missed it and everyone already. But what can I do?? I'm not sure I really had a choice...

I went to bed last night stressed to the limit with a pounding head.

All I had to do was put in my headphones, listen to Jared Leto's georgous voice and beautiful lyrics, and I was okay. Everything seemed not so difficult anymore. The power music can have never ceases to amaze me.


Speaking of Jared Leto, 30 Seconds To Mars is going on tour again, this time sponsored by MTV. And they're not coming to my town. And I'm am really freaking disappointed. I need to go to a concert. I need to go to one of their concerts.



Quote:
Author Tony Campolo, who makes a regular circuit as a chapel speaker on Christian college campuses, for a time used this provocation to make a point. "The United Nations reports that over ten thousand people starve to death each day, and most of you don't give a shit. However, what is even more tragic is that most of you are more concerned about the fact that I just said a bad word than you are about the fact that ten thousand people are going to die today." The responses proved his point : in nearly ever case Tony got a letter from the chaplain or president of the college protesting his foul language. The letters never mentioned world hunger.
1 Comments
Mood: relieved
Sounds Heard: The Kill [acoustic] - 30 Seconds To Mars

lost_souls I happened upon... Sep 18th, 2006 6:06:35 pm - Subscribe
So. I happened upon this online magazine called CONFRONT Magazine. I think everyone should check it out. It's all about music. And you can probably guess why I want you to read it! =D
CONFRONT Magazine

Let me know what you think. =]






Tomorrow we are going to hear the Dalai Lama at UB. I hope it's interesting. We'll see. I'm sure I'll have something to say about it afterwards, so check back if you're interested.




Quote:
Do you want me to tell you something really subversive?
Love is everything it's cracked up to be.
That's why people are so cynical about it.
It really is worth fighting for,
Being brave for,
Risking everything for.
If you don't risk anything --- You risk even more.
0 Comments
Mood: content maybe?
Sounds Heard: Throw It Away - Toby Rand

lost_souls I'm trying. Sep 25th, 2006 9:17:33 am - Subscribe
I'm trying my damndest here. I'm trying to believe you. With every fiber of my being I want to believe you and stop questioning you. I keep going over everything in my head, trying to figure it out, you know? But I just don't know.

Why do I even care? It doesn't affect me. But then again, maybe it does. Why else am I worrying about it?
2 Comments
Mood: confused