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as i walked across the park fom leaving the drama audition, which i was already nervous about, i saw him!! the one that fucked up my whole existence!! seeing my ex boyfriend with "her" made me wanna grab the knife my friend was playing with and ram it through for deep and evil heart!! no-one knows how much i still care bout him! people wouldnt understand! my class "mates" say that i make up false memoryies of the time we were togehter! the only real memory i have people say is true is the day that he first touched me!! i still feel those gastly hands run down my neck every time i lay in bed!! i look at the photo beside my bed, which has been there for over a year after we broke up, and all i see is the fact that one day he might love me again! each day i wonder |
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i know i sound like i complain alot!! but im pritty ok with my life!! well not the people in it!! but i love my music and i love to act but the people that surrond me are ones of evil!! pure and simple!! i hate people!! well all the ones i know!! i wanna met a friend, and boy friend, a eqantince, enyone that wont just reject me when the realise who i am!! i havnt had a guy friend in about a year!! but its my fault i know that but i wanna met a guy wont think if he gets me drunk ill have sex with him!! just a decent guy that treats me right!! but im asking for the imposible! |