 it will always be. about me. the others. memories past. home |
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it will always be. about me. the others. memories past. home |
| -Title- |
Feb 9th, 2005 3:29:55 pm - Subscribe |
| I just don't know what to do anymore, I don't even understand what I'm thinking about! I used to understand myself more then anything ...every thought I had made perfect sense to me. What's happening? School just seems like too much for me right now. I can hardly take it ...it's never been this hard before. I don't mean the work, just the effort. I can no longer force myself to do something I so dread. I'm tired of this life ... I've given all I can ...it's not enough. Okay, so I have come to a couple conclusions why things have just been so messed up, emotionally. Maybe this dramatic change, my mother knowing I want to leave. I guess now that my mom knows, it's become far more official and I'm finally realizing I'm growing up, and there's no turning back. Whatever I do now is with me for life. I also think ...it's because I'm having some sort of emotional break down. I think I've had them before, but I'm not completely sure ...since I'm no expert on them, but judging a lot of emotions and feelings, it seems to be a logical answer. I hate being away from Zander ... I finally burned a new mix CD, which I needed.  I hope tonight goes better, hope everyone is happy! ... ~Marlene |
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| mood: don't know Current Tune: Neutral Milk Hotel - King Of Carrot Flowers Pt, 2-3. |
(8) sat behind the drumset. |
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david |
February 09th, 2005 |
| Hej Marlene, I hope you feel better. When will you be seeing Zander again? Congrats on getting the mix cd done. | ||
| xstoicfate |
February 09th, 2005 |
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| Hi ^_^ i hope things get better for you |
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marlene |
February 09th, 2005 |
| Well, Hopefully March break! Which is still far away ...but, worth the wait, of course. Thanks.  |
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cocopop |
February 09th, 2005 |
| Awww, why don't you see him more often? Does he live in a different city? My bf lives in a different country and most of the times on a different continent.  |
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marlene |
February 09th, 2005 |
| That must be extremely hard, mine lives 6 hours away. His dad works about an hour away from me and drives back to their house on weekends, so I usually catch a bus and ride with him to go there ...but it doesn't happen as often as I'd like. Schools in the way ... |
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marlene |
February 09th, 2005 |
| Thank you, Buggy. =D | ||
| deathcab4u |
February 09th, 2005 |
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| You are tough, and everything's going to be cool. I think we go through these times, and get stronger. It seems like the feeling will never end, but it does, it will. | ||
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marlene |
February 10th, 2005 |
| Thanks Deathcab, sticking on that thought is one of the only things keeping me going. | ||
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