Kerrrr-Plunk!
Date: Jan 26th, 2007 11:31:50 am - Subscribe
Mood: wet


Once again, displaying his supreme intellect, MAYZIN deposited his Q into his brand new swimming pool. Apparently, he had it in his shirt pocket and when he leaned over to inspect the craftsmanship...kerplunk! Oddly enough, he decided to not immediately retrieve it and it is still submerged the next day. One can only hope a batwings shaped rust stain is left when he finally retrieves it. Happy snorkeling donkey-boy!
Comments: (1)


Medieval Indian Films?
Date: Dec 8th, 2006 11:08:48 am - Subscribe
Mood: aroused


The MaZ is notorious for making ridiculous small-talk with people, quite often when they're ass-deep in work. While it is incredibly annoying, it does provide humorous material on occasion. This my friends...is one such occasion...

This MaZLiB takes place at lunchtime. A fellow bit-slinger (let's call him Monty) made his way down our aisle, trying to gather the lunch herd. It just so happens that the wanderer is of Indian decent. MaZ decided to base his nonsensical blather on that this fine day.

The conversation went something like this:

MaZ: Hey Monty, do you know of any Indian films based in the Middle Ages?

Monty: Yeah, the Kama Sutra.

MaZ: Really? Think I could watch that with my in-laws?

Monty: No...I don't think that would be a good idea.

If you're like me, you hear the screeeeeech of a car's brakes before hitting a telephone pole. "No"? My response would have been -- "Yeah, I think they'll really like it. It's a fantastic love story." -- Could you imagine MaZ's sheer embarrassment? He's be whistlin like a freakin teapot! Kama Sutra baby!


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Camelback Mtn Jockey
Date: Nov 28th, 2006 3:58:37 pm - Subscribe
Mood: starving


A high-paid consultant is here this week helping the Maz-man do his incredibly difficult job. Let's call him "Stan".

So Stan and Maz bounce back and forth between Maz's cube and his "build machine" cube. Stan happened to notice the pyramid-shaped stack of pennies growing on my cube wall. Here's a bit of the dialog that occurred, once again reassuring us that Maz is a blithering dolt.

Stan - "I like your pyramid of pennies."

Me - "Oh thanks, we're actually trying to shape it like Camelback Mountain."

Stan - "Cool. Now I see why you moved here Mazen. More like Egypt...desert, camels, pyramids."

Maz - "Actually, I've always been here. This is my office."

Stan - "I actually meant Phoenix -- closer to your Egyptian roots."

Maz - "Oh, right."

Stan - "Sorry, it was just a weak attempt at humor."

Maz - "You know, I've never had the honor of riding a camel."

Stan - "Yeah, I hear they're pretty ornery."

Maz - "Oh, really?"


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In & Out
Date: Nov 2nd, 2006 10:32:05 am - Subscribe
Mood: strong


Preface:
An informal discussion was taking place about our re-re-re-opened cafeteria and our skepticism about the quality of food. Engineer-P made a comment about how crappy the french fries were.


MaZ: You ever been to "In & Out"?
Eng-P: Yeah, once...
MaZ: You didn't like it?
Eng-P: I did, for some reason, I've never been back.
MaZ: You know, they make their fries out of potatoes there.
Eng-P: Doesn't everyone?
MaZ: Oh yeah, well, they actually have potatoes there.


Moral of the story:
Potatoes and fries go hand-in-hand.


Comments: (1)

Mr. Early Bird
Date: Oct 13th, 2006 4:51:27 pm - Subscribe
Mood: enlightened


As we all know, the Maz-matic tends to scuff into the office anywhere between 8:30 and 9:30. Today, he took a gamble and rolled in at 7:15, where he was greeted by the C# sensei. The converstation went something like this:

SENSEI: You're here early.
MAZ: Yes I am.
SENSEI: How come?
MAZ: I always wondered what it would be like to come in early. You know what I mean?

Mark you calendars... 10/13/2006. The day the Maz-Man experienced first-hand, the joy of coming in early. God bless America.
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