|
I would really like if someone could help me edit my blog. If anyone would be glad to help then IM me. msn: rancidjellyphish@hotmail.com AIM: mysnishardxcore |
|
Right now. In this point of my life, I'm very confused. It's like. Everyone else got an instruction manual to their life, but mine came defected and without one. I'm in love with this girl. She says she loves me, but can't be with me. And the pain of the outcome nausuates me. I'm a podunk white boy living in a rural ghetto area. I try to trick myself as into believing that I have friends. Then once I think really hard about it, I realize that I do not. I have no one to care for me, as my parents do not. I have no one to talk to about my problems except this. I have to keep all my problems inside of me as if I tell my parents or anyone for that matter they will just insult me and tell me that something is wrong with me [there is]. My eyes are bloodshot and dark due to lack of sleep. I stay up all night always just thinking. When I do asleep I sleep for very long periods of time as that is all there is to do in my life. I wake up blind to the world and unaware what is going on around me. I care for only one person, yet that person is not here with me. I like to feel sorry for myself and get that sharp chest pain when I do. That is the only feeling I can ever feel. I never feel happiness for when I do, I just think of how shitty my life still is and that there is nothing to be happy about. I think that if I compared myself to one thing, it would be shit. The reason for that is because no one cares or pays attention until they have to deal with me. Every time I turn around someone dies, it's always happening and I'm always wondering when my time will come. That could possibly be my biggest fear, but at the same time be my biggest relief. |
   Pics of me. Ha. Anyway, I'm having a lot of tough stress on me with classes, and honestly, I'm to lazy to do anything about it, 'cept let it pass by. I know it's not the best decision, but it's all I do. Going downtown tommorow to get me a starbucks [whee] white moca with double shot espresso, baby. After that we're going to a local show. I hope they're good. |
|
There's a look on your face, I would like to knock out. See your sin in your grin, and the shape of your mouth. All I want is to see you in terrible pain, thought we won't ever meet I remember your name. You are scum, you are scum, and I hope that you know, that the cracks in your smile, are begining to show. Now the world needs to see, that its time you should go. Theres no light in your eyes, and your brain is too slow. Bet you sleep like a child, with a thumb in your mouth. I could creep up beside, put a gun in your mouth. Makes me sick, when I hear all the shit that you say, So much crap comming out, it must take you all day. There's a space in kept in hell, with your name on the seat. With a spike in the chair, just to make it complete. When you look at yourself, do you see what I see? If you do, why the fuck are you looking at me? There's a time for us all, and I think yours must be. Can you please hurry up, cause I find you obscene. We can't wait for the day, that your never around. When that face isn't here, and you rot underground. |
| i wish i lived in a tree and had animal friends. we would talk about people and how foolish they can be. i'd laugh, not really knowing how much of a fool i am myself. however they would accept me, not out of pity, but because they would love the good in me. they wouldn't care how abnormal i looked. they would forgive me for not having fur or feathers, and secretly be a bit jealous of my smooth skin. i would eventually find someone like me. a fool, who would know what it's like to not quite fit in, but she would be the most beautiful thing i've ever laid eyes on. she would be brutally honest, yet have the most gentle touch. i'd even be a bit jealous of her smooth skin... |