I
Heart
Gir

random puzzlement
Date: Apr 23rd, 2006 8:20:29 pm - Subscribe
Mood: insane


It's funny how things that seem so natural to me, not even second nature, just the way things are, are so very different from the way "normal" people think. Like how voids are weightless. I see the logic there; It's nothingness. How can it be so heavy? But it is. Thats the way I see it anyways. I feel the weight of it constantly, pushing at me from all sides. But if it's nothingness; if it essentially doesn't exsist at all, how can it do that? It just can. It just does. That's just the way things are.

Or maybe I'm looking at it the wrong way. Maybe it's not something outside pushing, maybe it's something inside pulling. A void inside, completley weightless, completley nothing, pulling at the few somethings I am. Yes, that must be it. I'm being sucked into myself, slowly imploding.

God I'm so emo.

Or maybe i'm just insane. I guess last week was just too long.
Comments: (0)

*anger*
Date: Apr 22nd, 2006 9:55:47 pm - Subscribe
Mood: pissed off


So, it was less of an I'm-so-fucking-happy-to-see-you hug and more of an I'm-so-fucking-high hug.
Comments: (0)

stupidity and happiness
Date: Apr 21st, 2006 8:56:39 am - Subscribe
Mood: Everything is as it should be


So I just heard the second stupidest comment that I have ever heard in my life. "I don't really care if ugly people smoke, but I don't think pretty people should."

...

And this reminded me of the stupidest comment I've ever heard, "I don't see why everyone makes such a big deal out of tanning. I mean, who cares if I get skin cancer and die later, so long as I look good now."

The stupidity of some people amazes me. I wish I could hear the thought processes that lead to these comments. I really wish I understood why a painful death is worth looking good.

You know what, on second thought, I don't want to know. I'm just going to sit here and ponder why ugly people can smoke and pretty people can't.

In actual news, today is a good day. I have entertainment in the form of stupidity beyone measure, I have shortened classes and a pep assembly after school, I have an english assignment that I actually like, and I have Beth hugs. An actual hug that wasn't at all an after thought. It was one of those run-and-tackle-Bree-in-the-hallway-because-I'm-just-that-happy-to-see-her hugs. *GLEE* Maybe I am just paranoid about her not really liking me. Yes, today is a good day. Today is a very good day.

Ah yes, and I have fun happening this weekend. Nocole, Beth, and I are going over to Tobie's house saturday or sunday. Sitting around playing video games all day. There is nothing more fun than that.

So yes, today is a good day and this weekend will be a good weekend and with any luck all of this good will rub off onto next week.
Comments: (1)

meh
Date: Apr 17th, 2006 9:37:50 am - Subscribe
Mood: broken


This weekend was just full of best-weekend-ever potential. It failed miserably. We didn't have school on Friday, so that was a plus. My friend Nicole had a bunch of people spend the night at her house on Friday. It was me and my sisiter and Tobie and Beth <3. We just sat around playing Resident Evil all night. It really was fun. Of course I couldn't just sit back and enjoy it because all I wanted to do was hang out with Beth, if only for a few minets, and all she wanted to do was play on the computer...and not let me withing five feet of the thing. So I sat there and watched Tobie kill Leon over and over in the most violent ways imaginable.

I guess it wasn't that big of a deal. I've just always been worried that she doens't really like me all that much. I'm pretty much thinking she's only dating me so she's not single. I'm always the one going out of my way to talk to her. I'm always the one grabbing her hand in the hallway. She hugs me sometimes but only as an after thought. Like, she'll start to walk away and then "Oh wait, I should give Bree a hug because that's what you do when your dating someone.

It's probablly just my own paranoia. I've been known do that kind of thing a lot.

And then there's my sister. The Idiot. I love her to death, I do. I have no reason to. I have no reason to trust her. I have no reason to even like her. But...ah. She's so fucking emotastic. Her boyfriend cheated on her and ever since then it's just been "My life is over. I have no reason to live. Shoot me now." And now she's talking about cutting herself. and all I can say to that is WHAT THE FUCK?! I can't seem to make her understand that that isn't any kind of way to solve problems. That it actually causes more problems than it helps. But what would I know, right? I've only been dealing with it for the past five years. How dare I think that I understand it half as well as she does.

This is my fault. She thinks it's going to help because she thinks it's helped me. Because I haven't been able to explain to her how hard it is to deal with. She's wreking her sanity because of me and there is nothing I can do about it.

I just...gah
Comments: (0)

Lesbians On Exstasy <3
Date: Apr 4th, 2006 10:31:39 pm - Subscribe
Mood: <3


So I just found the greatest band to ever exist (besides Modest Mouse of course).

http://www.lezziesonx.com/main.php

Lesbians On Ecstasy. The name alone makes them beyond awesome, and they sound pretty good to boot. Much <3
Comments: (1)