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dream
Aug 20th, 2004 5:54:56 am - Subscribe |
so i had this dream that i was at this lake with my poppet, and i had jumped in, and i wasn't coming back up. He was standing on the dock, and got worried, so he jumps in. He swims down a bit, and i'm just sort of floating in mid water, and i grab him, and drag him down the the bottom. he's struggling to get away from me, cause he's freaking out, and i tell him, as if i am not underwater (i.e. that i sound normal) that when i died, he was going to die with me. Well he screams, and struggled even harder till finally he couldn't hold his breath anymore, and inhaled his lungs full of water. So he's coughing and trying to breath, and get the water out for a minute, then he stops moving. I sat on the bottom, not needing to breath, holding his dead body in my arms, wondering what went wrong. Then I start crying, my tears like oil in the water, retaining their dropplets and floating up and out of my eyes, because he died, and i didn't, and it was all wrong.
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Mood:
bittersweet
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music:
Ever So Sweet - The Early November |
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oh portal of knowledge
Aug 17th, 2004 4:48:38 am - Subscribe |
my college classes start tomarrow. this'll be my first year going to college, sept for when I took french back in highschool at the community college by my house, but that was an awful experience(I hate the french). Anyways, i'm gunna be taking the highest level of english possible for a freshman *ehe*, easy math, and then some political science. should be fun.
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Mood:
eager
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music:
My Only Enemy - American Hi-Fi |
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poem - i don't like it
Aug 9th, 2004 5:21:27 am - Subscribe |
Light filters through flowing particles of hydrogen dioxide
I sit at the very bottom, looking up through blurring eyes
I can feel the carbon, leaving me
If I wait too long, Im going to gasp
My lungs will burn, and Ill push off the bottom
It might be too late to save myself
It might be what I want
But you grab me, and pull me up
My lungs fill with oxygen
And my nearness to death is past
Im not sure if I should thank you
Or hate you
For tearing me away from what I could have done
There have been people before
Insisting on my continuation of life
And always, I listen and obey
I do not think of what I want; only what they tell me
Only what they want
So I let you pull me up for air
And I dont tell you what I want to do
And everyone is happy
Except for me.
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Mood:
disappointed |
music:
Evanescence - Everybody's Fool |
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Ny Batteri
Aug 7th, 2004 2:37:41 am - Subscribe |
*does the tango*
I forgive to easily, it's like, I never feel as if the person deserves me to be mad at me, and yet, they do, somehow. So where I should still be angry, I'm not. I see them, and I just forget about everything that happened up till that point. Then later, I am angry at myself for forgetting I was angry. Either that, or I hurt myself because I beleive that I was the one in the wrong. It suxorz >_<
hungry, yes, i want nachos. mmmm nachos. ^_^
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Mood:
hungry |
music:
Sarai - What Mama Told Me |
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*guh* *thump*
Aug 5th, 2004 10:58:32 pm - Subscribe |
This is as good as this is going to get, for now. I'm being lazy, heh. I will make a better layout later, really, it will have images and everything. But, right now, I think, I'm going to go rock climbing  well, not really, but, bouldering. *sweatdrop* HE is over. yeah, you all know who.
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Mood:
tired |
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