Have I let you down somehow? Did I say something offensive? Do something? Go overboard? Am I grating on your nerves? What did I do?

I'm confused. Baffled. And altogether not so happy.

The day started off right; it had to, it's Friday! I was enjoying myself, quite a bit actually... then happy plans fell through, of course, they always do, I half-expected it, but then me, I always hope they don't, because happy plans are... well, I was excited. Stupid me and my stupid happy hope. I acted like I wasn't disappointed, like I always do, because I'm not expected to mind.

I don't remember the last time I talked to her, and she left for the weekend, and didn't even call to say goodbye before she went. I doubt if she'll even call when she gets home. I've lost importance. I want to see her, I miss her even. It doesn't matter, I suppose. I can't change anything.

I'm such a fucking weakling. Why can't I speak? Mute as well, how perfect. Useless.

And the one person who listens, that one who drinks my breath like wine, I cannot find words for.

My apologies.