Heya
Date: Mar 1st, 2005 9:43:03 am - Subscribe
Mood: so-so
I'm in better spirits now...well, not really, I have a lot of homework...school is hard when you have zero motivation! Maybe I'll find a boyfriend and have some fun...then I might get something done around here...
Comments: (3)
That's it, I've finally lost it...Throw in the towel Johnny...
Date: Feb 20th, 2005 6:56:16 pm - Subscribe
Mood: awkward
I think, I decided, that it is probobly the case, that I take comfort in feeling used. The cigarettes, the random guys, the lack of sleep, too much caffiene, staying out untill 3am, going to too many shows, too much loud music, etc; it's all a plot I have against myself, to make myself physically feel bad, so that I will feel better emotionally. Like the worse I feel, the better things are because I don't have to think about my real problems. Does it make sense? No, not at all. but that's how I run...crazy?
Comments: (3)
The Life and Times of...
Date: Feb 18th, 2005 3:23:49 pm - Subscribe
Mood: upset
Another fun-filled, action-packed weekend coming up: Two shows, shopping, first date w/ Matt, precal project, presidency research paper, and packing for the trip to New Orleans. I'm so glad I'm leaving Tuesday. I need to clear my head. I feel like such a phony. All I do is go through the motions, put up this front, even though I procrastinate and never get anything done. I want to be genuinely happy again...instead of just pretending. The truth is, I'm miserable. I have been every since Eric dumped me. I miss being in love, I want to find that again, but I probobly won't, for a very long while anyways. Love isn't worth it if you are just going to go through this much pain afterwards. The only way I'll ever be in a another serious relationship is if it'll last forever...but then there's no way of knowing, all well. I think I give up.
Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of withering, of tarnishing.
~ Anais Nin
There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course.
Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.
-Carl Jung
How much longer?
Comments: (2)