soooo it's been awhile....school blows this year, seriously..not that it hasn't any other year, but everyone i hear talking about it, is complaining bout how hard it is...isn't senior year supposed to be your easiest? well, last year was pretty easy for me..but this year, started off hard from the beginning..

so wed. night was lots of fun, i was put with the four year olds, with this teacher that not many ppl want to work with..but i don't mind her. as long as the kids are there. deborah ended up working with her mom, that's why i wasn't in there, my mom was working in the 5's...no way do i want to work with her, but whatever...so anyways i'm with the same kids i had last year, which is kinda funny...i really did wannna meet the new kids, ones i don't know so well, but it's kinda nice cause these kids already knew em. one of em was crying down the hall, but when he saw me and found out i would be one of his teachers again this year, he stopped and went right in the classroom...i won't tell you who is was, though it kinda made me a little happier. and well, that's all the fun i had this week, i think every day i've been up past midnight, once i stayed up til one...cept for last night i think i feel asleep around 11...no homework to work on...hehehe...

and also perfect sent me the whole krystal meyers cd over the internet...hehe she really didn't know how to do that since i told her. anyways, i've fallen for it...it's like every song i listen to describes me perfectly or what i'm going through or where i want to be at in my life..and it's just so weird....the weirder thing is she is the only female singer i've listened to and like and have a cd off..and so on..cept for superchick and that's a band and the singers are girls but the rest of the bad are boys..so that was just another thing that made it weird..oh and i think i've listened to one female rapper before, wasn't too bad, but ya get what i'm saying..so now..comes the lyrics to describe me at the moment...cause i don't really have time to get into what happened on tues....and stuff..or about today so far...

The Way to Begin
by Krystal Meyers

Dear God
It's me again down here
Don't wanna sound insincere
I'm lost
Sometimes you're so unclear
What can I do?
I'm feeling so far from you
Frustrated
Irritated
Disconnected from it all
The weight of the world
Has pushed me to the wall

[Chorus]
I surrender
To you I'm giving in
Come take me
Save me
I want to start again
I'll open my broken heart
'Cause I've reached the end
And you are the way to begin

Ohh ohh...ohhh....

I've seen a million empty smiles
Living in denial
I don't wanna live like that
where nothing's real
I hate how it is to feel
Frustrated
Irritated
Disconnected from it all
I'm breaking
I'm aching for something beautiful

[Chorus]

All the riches in this world
Couldn't fill this great big hole (I surrender)
It takes something so much more (I surrender)
Only you can take me
You can make me whole

It's not the end this is the beginning
It's not the end...its not the end...

[Chorus]

(I surrender....I surrender....)
It's not the end this is the beginning