there's so much i need to write about..on here...in my journal...somewhere. anywhere....

when will i have the time...when will i have the time and feel like it at the same time?

like for example, these dreams i've been actually remembering...their coming back. the ones that haunt me. about dying...death. last week i killed myself...and last night i killed somebody else...and it felt so good...maybe i've been watching too much diagnosis murder lately..or maybe not, i really don't think that's it. i just think they've come back to haunt me..not that i'm scared or anything by them...i just know in a way it's not right is it? am i really supposed to dream about this and imagine it???

i think i've been spending too much time by myself lately and i've been letting my thoughts and imagaination go..i know it's not good for me...it may be for anne of green gables...but not for me...i wish it was not like this....not like this at all. i wish i was anne right now and could escape to my forest with my books and adventurous spirit..and maybe even a bosom friend as well...a real kindred spirit right by my side...