so i got a new laptop and i'm on it right now. it's pretty neat cause i can be in my room on it...i'm offline right now but i opened up this screen to type in..and then i can just close it when i get too tired to type anymore or if i'm done and then just post it in the morning or so when i get back on the internet. i don't have to worry about someone turning the computer off on me anymore...and it's real nice cause i'm laying down in bed right now typing..hehe..it's almost like writing in a journal. cept it's not.

so my dad went and picked me out this really nice laptop. it was a thousand dollars...and that's real nice of him and all but i still can't wait to get away from him..i should have known it'd cause more problems. right after i started using it he wanted to start yelling at me that i wasn't holding it right. i had it on my lap..i thought that's what a laptop was for...but no..i'm supposed to put it on a hard surface so the air can ventilate..blah..blah..blah...and then he wants to tell me that i should call this girl's mom who knows alot about computers and ask her to set up something where it will automatically clean itself. i know, my mom already told me that she'd ask her if she would. but my dad kept going on and on like he expected me to call her right that second. so i yelled back "I KNOW!!!" yah, so then i left and went outside, didn't want to be around him..but he has to follow me outside and continue screaming at me and telling me you're a snob..you're such a snob..you're a snob..like repeating himseft is going to make what he's saying have more of an affect on me..i don't know what he expected. i just ignored him. then seconds later he comes back and yells some more..cept this isn't yelling as much as talking LOUDLY. "i'm sorry, i shouldn't have called you a snob." no emotion, just a straightforward LOUD apology...so i guess counseling is teaching him something. if only it would help things between him and my brother. but i do acknowledge the fact that he did spend more on this laptop for me then he should have and i should just accept it which i did. i told him i loved it. but part of me also wonders why he did it. i know it's part of who he is, when you need to get something you should just get the best cause if you get a cheap one it'll break and you'll have to buy another one and you'll end up spending more than you would have if you just bought the better one in the first place...but i dunno. part of me questions if this is the only way he really knows how to show he actually doesn't mind me being his daughter...ewww i know that sounded weird but it was the only way i knew how to put it. most of the time on here i can say anything but sometimes my fingers are limited as to what they can type...

so the past week things have still been rough at my house, more than usual for me cause i haven't been babysitting as much and i've just been staying home. today i finished my thousand piece puzzle, i now have two to glue together..i plan to take them to college with me and hang on the wall.

my admissions counselor called me the other day to tell me that i am rooming with adrian. it's good that i requested her cause if i was just now finding out who my roommate was when i'm supposed to be there next sat...that's a little too late to start talking and finding out who has what and what we need. i've been talking to adrian some..and we went shopping together once...but we should have got together a little more. but again i was the one calling her when i did..she hasn't called me..and i just hate that. but she's not one to pick up the phone either...at least i don't think. i realized i really don't know her. i met her in 6th grade when she was morgan's friend...and then later on she started going to church..but isn't that sad that i still really don't know that much about her? i know..i'm horrible. ahh well guess i better go now...i promise..more soon!