gawd.
Date: Nov 7th, 2004 9:24:24 pm - Subscribe
Mood: heavenly
Highlight of the Day: emailing with *****
what i wouldnt give to have you here right now.
Comments: (2)
here's what i think...
Date: Nov 6th, 2004 10:17:21 pm - Subscribe
Mood: doubtful
Highlight of the Day: listening to the Faint - Worked Up So Sexual
it's so great to come into lab here at school, pull out the ipod, turn on some faint, and tune out the rest of the world.
thank you ipod, for bringing the highlight of the day today.
and for *****, i wish i knew who that person was. i don't know why...i'm just curious. do you really like my hair?
Comments: (0)
Oh why...
Date: Nov 3rd, 2004 10:53:58 pm - Subscribe
Mood: neutral
Highlight of the Day: 3D Lecture
I am so jealous of her...the object of your undying affection...every post you make about her...it aches my heart that much more...What I wouldn't give to be in her position...only I would return the feelings to you, unlike she does.
She is undeserving of your affection.
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something i think about..
Date: Oct 22nd, 2004 7:02:54 am - Subscribe
Mood: stumped
Highlight of the Day: disarronno sour (extra sour) at the ale house
do you ever become so familiar with someone's face, that when you happen to look at it, you get the feeling you don't recognize them at all?
post a comment and tell me i'm not crazy.
Comments: (3)
it's early morning
Date: Oct 21st, 2004 8:23:26 am - Subscribe
Mood: incomplete
Highlight of the Day: the first quote up there
i'm shooting emails back and forth with my ex, out to sea at the moment, i'm stuck in my little corner with my desk, some fun-sized heath bars, and the internet.
he wrote this to me today:
"you know what ****? sometimes i wish we could live like split lives...like
clones and let them do the things we cannot..."
well...needless to say, i wish this too, so it went straight to my heart.
he typed this in his lj:
"but i am fighting it.
and i want to tell you all how much you mean without hurting you. i think the time is drawing near that i will be calling a few people, holding back tears and tell them how much they mean. truth. only the truth.
there is closure that i need to have for me."
why do i want this phone call? almost..badly...
sometimes i think of the times we were together when i'm trying to drift off to sleep. recalling that uneasiness...nervousness...excitement...and the strange comfort that comes from him.
the first time he kissed me, on my neck...and the second time in my car..the night i came back from VCU to see him...and the lunch at mahi mah's...actually times that stand out vividly were the times i was having trouble with *****, and ***** took me for agonizingly short rides in the 'sol...the emotion that was contained inside of me at the moment i was leaning onto him and crying, grabbing him as tight as i could with my small, weak hands, and just fearing the moment i had to leave to go inside my "house"...i remember what that feels like.
is it sadistic that i miss it?
i can hardly contain myself, i'm so happy to be talking to him comfortably again. of course i'm certain not to let some things cross into our chat, but then again, i may hint sometimes (which i think is what prompted the first quote i have up there; my telling him about how i suddenly wanted him next to me in the car as i was coming home from doing groceries).
so, lastly, my handle on here means "quietly" in japanese. it's kind of how i live this small life...quietly. how i speak, how i act/react, how i feel on the outside.
Comments: (2)