my head feels heavy
Date: Oct 10th, 2011 3:35:53 pm - Subscribe
Mood: foggy

it keeps killing my entries

no wonder the site is dying...
Comments: (0)

what happened?
Date: Oct 3rd, 2011 2:30:43 pm - Subscribe
Mood: pleasant

so what's been happening in my life in the last 4 years. i'll tell you.

sam and i broke up, i formed another band which is sadly now defunct have a listen at

wow, i can't really think of anything else.

i went to see dave hause, daniel andriano, brian fallon and the legend that is chuck ragan last night.

you north americans don't know how lucky you are.

oh, femme? i also met dan happy.gif

most of all at the moment i'm pretty lonely.

it's that time of year again

third christmas i'll be on my own.

we'll see.

i missed you guys. just thought you should know...
Comments: (4)

Four Whole Years
Date: Sep 24th, 2011 6:52:03 pm - Subscribe
Mood: lucky I'll tell you how I got back.

I suddenly remembered "Machete Operated Girl" that I wrote, and on the off-chance I tried racking my brains for the name of the goddamn blog site it was on.

Then they came flooding back, femme, oblong, all the mysterious blog posts, the Trio obsession (which, despite the best efforts of the last 2 albums, remains intact!)

Do these blogs even show up on friends feeds and stuff?

Because I sure as hell would love to know if Femme and Oblong a) remember me and b) are still around. Long shot I know, but hey, I remembered my password so anything can happen, right?

Much love...

Comments: (1)

stem the flow
Date: May 29th, 2007 5:25:48 pm - Subscribe
Mood: recalcitrant

the screen flickers into life,
with a burst of grey static,
the evening sun has fallen,
and the thermostat has broken,

you tumble off the sofa,
with a bottle in your hand,
your bloodshot eyes unfocused,
you scrabble in the dirt,

can't quite find the yellow one,
that would burn the fog away,
you're lips have turned all crusty,
you haven't bled today,

you move across the carpet,
like a snake across the dirt,
trying desperately to focus,
and blank your mind against the hurt

the ceiling lights have dimmed again,
the pain has just increased,
you take another mouthful,
and get temporary peace.

the burn, it rises in your throat,
the bile is coming near,
how did you end up in this mess,
the answer now is clear.
Comments: (0)

counterparts and number them
Date: May 29th, 2007 8:53:54 am - Subscribe
Mood: outraged

see, i'm cutting down smoking. really proper actually giving it a go.

me, the most pro smoking motherfucker on the planet.

i spit in the eyes of your oxygen tubes and respirators, for i am (was) indestructible

until i started to struggle to breathe.

so the uberlord of smoking, drinking, toking, sniffing etc, get this, IS GETTING HEALTHY GODAMMIT!

i swear to god, the day i wear "preppy" clothes or even , god forbid, start smiling will be the day my daddy's backyard will freeze over.
Comments: (1)

ripping out the vocal chords...
Date: May 28th, 2007 8:00:08 am - Subscribe
Mood: decaffeinated

...was what i was up to on saturday afternoon. i have a brand new side project with my drummer, mr friday. we are the gun audition, and we play acoustic hardcore, much in the vein of hot water music, seven seconds, etc. its bloody good stuff so far, we wrote 3 songs, and i swear i could taste blood at the end of the afternoon.

on a more sombre note, i have no job, i have cabin fever and i'm constantly bored

and putting on a fuckload of excess flesh.

i make the big show look like paris hilton. all will change however, all will change,

wish i had something cool and mysterious to write about.

i wonder if i could ever top "machete operated girl"?

give me ideas, my canadian lovelies
Comments: (1)

can i scream?
Date: May 23rd, 2007 6:23:08 am - Subscribe
Mood: loving

fuck a doodle doo, i remembered my old password.

just remembering the literate conversations and friends i met here, my canadian "bitches", (woah there girls, i was kidding!)

a lot has happened since i last entered a blog on here.

shan't bore you with details.

i re-read and read again the machete operated girl blog (for oblongbox)

did i really write that?

I'm proud of it. so proud i posted into myspace (

hopefully i'll be on here a lot more

make me tea femme....

Comments: (3)

Alkaline Trio
Date: Nov 27th, 2005 10:39:21 am - Subscribe
Mood: Blissed

oh my word

absolutely fantastic. The queue for the door stretched all the way round the block, past Scruffy Murphys (where we decided to go for a beer) and down the road.

We got to the Bar Academy, where we figured if we went in for a drink, we could get our ticket stamped, get a couple shots of Jack and Coke and go in through the side entrance of the Carling Academy

We got in, and Sunshine were just finishing their set, not bad, English punk rock, but with the emo fringes perfectly coiffured. We got another beer and waited patiently for Mr Mike Park to appear. His set felt way too short and sweet but he was superb as usual.

Waiting for the mighty Trio was like waiting for a kettle to boil. To begin with, Sam and I were at the side of the stage, but as soon as the eerie intro music began, I found myself about 3 rows from the front, in the most unbearable heat. They stormed through an astonishing set taken mainly from "Crimson", surprisingly omitting live favourites like "Hell Yes" and "Queen Of Pain", Dan was on top form as the opening chords of "Maybe I'll Catch Fire" ripped out across the auditorium, both him and Matt looking dapper, Matt sporting the hat from the "Crimson" cover, and Derek showing off his funky new mohican. After a few more tunes, including "Fatally Yours", "We've Had Enough" and a version of "I Lied My Face Off" that nearly made me wee with excitement, I decided it was way too hot in there and made my way back to Sam, my Macbeth t-shirt absolutely drenched with sweat and beer. The Trio left the stage, only to return with "Time To Waste" and a scintillating version of "Radio" with a neat crowd participation that was enough to make the hairs on the back of your neck go rigid.

We left the Academy, walked down to Moor Street Station, um... "made out" in a cubicle and went home, warm, fuzzy and totally Trio'd!
Comments: (5)

one hour...
Date: Nov 26th, 2005 10:44:09 am - Subscribe
Mood: beautiful

...and 18 minutes to go til the alkaline trio

doors at six, Sunshine at half past, Mike Park about seven, Trio at 7.45 until 9.30

full write up to follow!!
Comments: (1)

What The Hell Is Contempt?
Date: Nov 10th, 2005 12:56:57 pm - Subscribe
Mood: reggified

Reggie and the Full Effect have always been a mystery. Who are they? What do they want? Where do they come from? There have, of course, been explanations. Studio fires, faked deaths, cryptic bios and tall tales of many sorts were countered by rumors that James Deweesâ€"keyboardist for rock heroes The Get Up Kids' and drummer for seminal metalcore act Coalesceâ€"was somehow behind all the crazy characters taking credit for Reggie and the Full Effect’s synth-rock goodness. First there was the enigmatic Reggie, the band's apparent namesake and protagonist in a strange musical tale beginning with the release of the band’s Greatest Hits 1984-1987 in 1998, followed closely by Promotional Copy in 2000. Then there was the mustachioed frontman Paco, who came to the fore on 2003's Under the Tray, and album which also featured an ever-growing cast of charactersâ€"Finnish metal band Common Denominator, English synth-pop god Fluxuation, death growler Hungary Bear, the ubiquitous Drunk Guy at the Get Up Kids Showâ€"increasing both the band's popularity and perplexing mystique.

However, on Reggie and the Full Effect's new record, Songs Not To Get Married To, James Dewees is ready to come clean about his role as songwriter, multi-instrumentalist and mad scientist behind Reggie and the Full Effect. "Paco's dead now," proclaims Dewees, AKA Reggie, AKA Paco, AKA Klause from Common Denominator, AKA Fluxuation. "This record's more about me getting divorced; about working really hard for a really long time, then having everything taken away from you for no reason whatsoever other than somebody has the power to do it," he says. "Big man crushes small man syndrome." Granted, the history of the band's comical antics, song titles such as "The Fuck Stops Here," and the record's seemingly too-literal-to-be-true title might lead one to believe that Dewees merely jests about his inspiration for Songs Not To Get Married To. But Dewees insists that he is all too sincere about the theme for his latest masterpiece. The album opens with "What the Hell is Contempt?" a song, he says, inspired by his divorce court proceedings. "They called me up and said that were going to sue me for contempt," remembers Dewees. "And I was like 'what the hell is contempt?'" I don't even know what it is and I'm going to get sued for it."

But don't get out your handkerchief just yet. Songs Not to Get Married To, isn't all seriousness. Songs like the grinding metal number "The Trooth,"â€"which Dewees says is "about me having to go get a tooth pulled in the middle of recording. I tried to save it but they threw the tooth away. It was fucking gross."â€" and the dance-y "Dethnotronic" featuring Common Denominator and Hungary Bear, as well as snippets like "Guess Who's Back" and "Laura's Australian Dance Party" are all classic Reggie: switching genres at the drop of a hat, mixing irreverence and humor with razor-sharp guitars and sugar-coated melodies. And like Under the Tray, Songs Not To Get Married To was recorded at producer Ed Rose's Black Lodge Studios in Kansas, and includes guest spots by what Dewees refers to as his "all star friends," including Ryan and Robert Pope of The Get Up Kids, Benjamin Perri of From Autumn to Ashes, and Sean Ingram and Cory White from Coalesce. "I can always call in my all-star friends to help me out when I need them," says Dewees with a laugh. "With everybody being from the same small scene, we're all friends. Even as the scene is getting bigger, our friendships are all still like they were before. We all go out and get drunk together and bum cigarettes and money from each other all the time."

Though there is still the requisite silliness and genre-melding that fans of Reggie and the Full Effect have come to expect, Song Not To Get Married To is nevertheless a cathartic, one might even say serious record, at least by Reggie standards. "Everybody who's heard it so far has noticed that it was more serious," agrees James Dewees. "There's actually lyrics and songs not just about girls running away." But there are also plenty of fake accents, techno dance beats and Slayer-esque metal riffs to allay any concerns that Reggie has gone totally straight. "It’s still Reggie," says Dewees. "There's still the humor there, it's just taking things a little more serious, doing it a little bit more subtly."

Songs Not To Get Married To is a look at the man behind the curtain, the record that finally proves once and for all that James Dewees is Reggie and the Full Effect, and that Reggie and the Full Effect is, in fact, James Dewees. Such a personal record deserves a personal bio, or at least a personal end to a regular bio. So here is a message from James Dewees, AKA Reggie, to you, the recipient of this bio. The message is as follows: "This is my new record. It is a little less silly than the last three, but I recently got divorced and lost everything so I don't have much to celebrate these days. However, I am still a happy camper, just single camping now. I hope you enjoy the new record and if my ex-wife is one of those unknown people who gets one of these bios…wow, you scored hella good huh?"
Comments: (2)

nose over tail
Date: Nov 9th, 2005 10:21:12 am - Subscribe
Mood: contented

well, i feel pretty good about myself, despite everything. i cheered someone up and i feel something burning.

oh yeah, that would be my heart


anyways, i'm having a shit time but don't let me stop you
Comments: (2)

James Storie 1982-2005
Date: Nov 7th, 2005 2:32:03 pm - Subscribe
Mood: angry

My former guitarist in Brackenwood died in the early hours of Saturday morning in a car smash. My ex drummer called me a litle after seven this evening and told me.

I'm so numb, I really don't feel anything, except I'm just waiting for him to call or text saying "Hey dude, what you up to?"

I don't know much any more
Comments: (1)

its right fucking there in black & white & red
Date: Nov 7th, 2005 7:47:03 am - Subscribe
Mood: grand

Derek Grant Drums
Matt Skiba Guitar, Vocals
Daniel Andriano Bass, Vocals

About Alkaline Trio

Though the current world of Alkaline Trio is not nearly as fraught with and fueled by drink and drama as in the band's formative years, the making of the new Crimson (out May 24 on Vagrant), was not without its share of dark portents: Two bone-shattering skateboarding accidents, one PunkVoter tour that failed to block the reelection of George W. Bush… but oddly enough: No failed relationships!

As a result Crimson stands as the most mature and ambitious 13 songs Alkaline Trio has ever pushed itself to create-with able guidance from producer Jerry Finn (Green Day, Blink-182, Jawbreaker). From the ominous piano and atmospherics opening of first single "Time To Waste" to closing ballad "Smoke," not a moment or note is wasted as the familiar Trio balance of darkness and melody on "Mercy Me," "Dethbed" and "The Poison" nestles up against increasingly progressive tempos and arrangements of "Burn" and "Satin," and the epic true-to-life tales of Manson family member Sadie Mae Glutz ("Sadie") and the West Memphis Three ("Prevent This Tragedy").

Alkaline Trio's legacy harkens back to 1997, when Matt Skiba, a bike messenger from working class Chicago 'burb McHenry, gave up the drums for the guitar and began his quest for the perfect balance of lyrical hell and pop heaven. He and fellow messenger / drummer Glenn Porter and bassist Rob Doran would debut as Alkaline Trio for the Sundials 7”. Dan Andriano replaced Doran prior to the For Your Lungs Only EP, adding a second voice and songwriting style that complemented and contrasted with Skiba’s, and the signature Alkaline Trio sound was born.

Two albums on indie Asian Man Records, Goddamnit and Maybe I'll Catch Fire, followed in 1998 and 2000 respectively, punctuated by hard touring and yielding to-this-day live favorites "Radio," "Nose Over Tail" and the latter's title track. A self-titled compilation of early singles, EPs, compilation tracks and others odds 'n' ends followed later in 2000.

From Here To Infirmary was released in 2001, marking both the Trio's Vagrant Records debut and the addition of ex-Smoking Popes drummer Mike Felumlee to the fold. Singles "Private Eye" and "Stupid Kid" and staples "Crawl" and "Another Innocent Girl" became instant classics to the exponentially growing Alkaline Trio fan base that buoyed the record into the top 200 and packed clubs and theaters, transforming the band into a formidable worldwide draw.

The current Alkaline Trio line-up finally solidified with 2003's Good Mourning, as Derek Grant came aboard for the perfection of the Trio sonic identity that had been evolving since '97. On the strength of anti-mainstream anthem "We've Had Enough," the cloyingly bittersweet "All On Black," a yearning "100 Stories" and cautionary love and death serials "Emma" and "This Could Be Love," Good Mourning crashed into the Top 40, saw the band's debuts on Late Night with Conan O'Brien and The Late Show With David Letterman, and received raves from Rolling Stone, SPIN, Entertainment Weekly and the cover of Alternative Press.

Crimson delivers on this promise in spades. As "Time To Waste" builds from mounting menace to a majestic and traumatic chorus and segues directly into "The Poison," an Andriano barnburner reminiscent in spirit of those I Lied My Face Off era sides, though played with a fierce precision to which the early Trio could only aspire. "Burn" updates Skiba's songwriting acumen with twists and touches worthy of vintage Sisters of Mercy and Depeche Mode, while "Dethbed," "Mercy Me" and "Fall Victim" find an ever maturing but still familiar Alkaline Trio sound resurfacing like a long lost friend.

Just as Alkaline Trio were about to start recording Crimson, Matt Skiba fractured his wrist skateboarding. Though it was a minor break, and he was only in a cast for three weeks, the break pushed back the Trio's recording schedule and the pending album's release. After Skiba healed, the band jumped into recording and, with the help of producer Finn, finished in January '05. Skiba was anxious to get back on his board (though an avid skater since the age of ten, he had abandoned it for three months in fear of injuring himself again and further delaying the album's May 24th release). But, after 15 minutes, Skiba dropped into a pool and broke his left arm.

Now finally healed, Skiba is anxious to get Alkaline Trio back on the road. After all, the collective misfortunes that may have hobbled lesser acts have only provided Alkaline Trio with five studio albums worth of increasingly stronger material. As Skiba sings on the new record, "God bless catastrophe…"

Comments: (0)

Date: Nov 4th, 2005 7:11:29 am - Subscribe
Mood: devilishly roguish

today i'm a pirate. a naked pirate. that is all.

happy buccaneering motherfuckers!

Comments: (1)

bless me dark father, i have sinned
Date: Nov 4th, 2005 4:13:03 am - Subscribe
Mood: satanic

just had a look on femmeemo's new blog and thought i'd try the quiz. here's how i scored

You scored as Satanism. Your beliefs most closely resemble those of Satanism! Before you scream, do a bit of research on it. To be a Satanist, you don't actually have to believe in Satan. Satanism generally focuses upon the spiritual advancement of the self, rather than upon submission to a deity or a set of moral codes. Do some research if you immediately think of the satanic cult stereotype. Your beliefs may also resemble those of earth-based religions such as paganism.



















Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with

how unsurprised am i?
Comments: (1)

rest in peace
Date: Nov 1st, 2005 6:24:34 am - Subscribe
Mood: numb

john holahan of bayside was killed in a car accident in the early hours of this morning.

the vehicle hit a patch of ice and skidded off the road.

i feel pretty sad, i love that band

makes you think though...
Comments: (0)

machete operated girl (for oblongbox)
Date: Nov 1st, 2005 5:02:37 am - Subscribe
Mood: cursed

she beats her beat up pickup truck,
she stumbles in the pouring rain,
she sees what she wants but she cannot have,
the chance to go insane

she may not have a lot of things,
in fact her hands are tied,
she only does as she is told,
the darkness won't subside.

she operates on carbon fumes,
and driftwood from the sea,
she operates with precision,
shes not like you or me.

she's cutting thru the plastic shit,
that dominates our lives,
she's stainless steel and her aim is true,
her control is by the knife

she's a machete operated girl,
she cuts when she is told,
she never questions anything,
she'll cut til she grows old,

one day a man came far too close,
she swung until he broke,
she dropped the blade and then surveyed,
a scene that made her choke.

this machete operated girl, she fell unto her knees,
the ties that bound, they crumbled down,
her heart it did unfreeze

no more she carved, no more she hacked,
her mind was once more free,
her darkened heart, it fell apart,
and her once glazed eyes could see

Comments: (3)

Date: Oct 31st, 2005 10:08:47 am - Subscribe
Mood: dodgy

so i wandered into MySpace today and i decided to search out matt skiba, dan andriano and mike park.


how cool is that?

come on you people, taaaaaaaaaaaallk to meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
Comments: (2)

hell yes!!
Date: Oct 31st, 2005 5:23:54 am - Subscribe
Mood: belligerent

I gave up on you a long time ago
How can you blame me?
We made plans to meet and you never showed
You kept me waiting
They said everything would work out just fine
They said you'd help me
But as it turns out it was all a lie
And they're off someplace far away laughing at me

You've been there for me one time in my life
But it didn't matter
You came and went so fast all my hope
And faith in you shattered
And now here I sit alone in this room
No one to confide in
You watched all my dreams come apart at the seams
You laughed, you left, you waited in hiding

Bless me dark father I have sinned
I've done it before and I'll do it again
Cuz it keeps me warm, and makes you smile
Been beneath me all the while
Hell yes

You gave up on me along time ago
I can't say I blame you
I rejected the faith in your holy rays
Is what it comes down to
They said everything would work out just fine
I just went crazy
But I'm better now having a good time
Being selfish, and drunken, and vulgar, and lazy

Bless me dark father I have sinned
I've done it before and I'll do it again
Cuz it keeps me warm, and makes you smile
Been beneath me all the while

Bless me dark father I can't win
Without you I'm as good as dead
Cuz you keep me warm, you make me smile
You've been on my shoulder all the while

Whispering sweet nothings
Whispering sweet nothings
Whispering sweet nothings
You've been whispering sweet nothings

I adore that song. its better on the live dvd though

only 3 weeks to go, fuckers!!!!
Comments: (1)

i was a prayer
Date: Oct 26th, 2005 10:52:14 am - Subscribe
Mood: sardonic

please, oh PLEASE join my MySpace thing, I'm classic emocore, I wear my hair fringed at the front and dye it jet black. I have a jawline and cheekbones, I also listen exclusively to Jade Tree Records, Deep Elm Records and Drive Thru Records bands.
I also claim to have bought the first Sunny Day Real Estate record on the day of release and I look down on those whose record collections aren't as obscure as mine. I also have a very select network of "contacts". No friends, just "contacts".

all the above information is false by the way.

i noticed 2 people have me as a friend now.

who? who?

curioser and curioser.....
Comments: (3)

you make me ill
Date: Oct 26th, 2005 9:38:56 am - Subscribe
Mood: jaded

you post your heart unto the board,
always some mistake,
its me thats wrong every single time,
is it my will you're trying to break?

cause i'm not too strong these days,
and you've tested me before,
its getting closer to the day,
that i storm out of the door,

its the standard ending to a great beginning,
think of all i've given up,
my skin screams out for blood,
and you don't give a fuck,

i'll bleed away what you gave to me and i'll cleanse myself again,
i'll break the skin and start again,
and clear you from my life
Comments: (1)

my standard break from life
Date: Oct 26th, 2005 7:19:47 am - Subscribe
Mood: morbid

so i'm here downloading faces of death clips out of curiosity because i've nothing else to
do with my life.

i also signed up for myspace yesterday, i'm alkalinedeadboy in case you wondered, my msn space is better though, thats zombiepunkrockemoboy, go check it out and add me to messenger

i dare you

not seen many awesome blogs this week, still check out the usual suspects though

anyway, catch you later people
Comments: (0)

weak week
Date: Oct 20th, 2005 11:08:41 am - Subscribe
Mood: horny

god i've got fucking cabin fever. i need a job for fucks sake!

downloading lots of rare trio stuff, weak week, private eye (acoustic), halloween, bye bye love, bloody loads.

thats pretty much it actually.

i'm horny as hell now as well, she's SO gonna get some tonight!
Comments: (1)

the stars at night are big and bright
Date: Oct 17th, 2005 11:25:28 am - Subscribe
Mood: conflicted

...deep in your eyes miss vincent. you told me once i made you smile we both know damn well i didn't

i managed to get hold of "jaked on green beers"

only on the computer like, i need whatever ep/single/compilation it appeared on. pah, thats uk releases for you though.

do you ever feel like you can't differentiate between someone's past and the here and now?

course you do, you think about it all the time because there's nothing else to do.

ah, oblongbox, i see your point about the polished sound on crimson, but that and the previous release were both produced by jerry finn. he must be mellowing, either that or *gulp*, dan matt and derek ar growing up? i think there's a few songs on crimson that are worthy of good mourning, and at a push, from here to infirmary.

well thats my opinion anyways

as always, i look forward to the feedback grin.gif
Comments: (1)

i lied my face off
Date: Oct 14th, 2005 2:46:09 pm - Subscribe
Mood: betrayed

love that song

anyway, things really suck at the moment. i got offered a gig with my recently deceased band.

which normally would be a great thing except the fuckup regressed fucking CHILD of a drummer tried to force me into it, calling me childish, telling me to grow up etc, asking why i haven't called him.

its cause you're a cunt.... mate

fuck them all
Comments: (2)

i know its dark here, you know that i\'m scared too
Date: Sep 18th, 2005 10:21:55 am - Subscribe
Mood: distraught

need some music to make you feel loved? mare you misunderstood? alone? empty?


the big major label cocksmoking moneygrabbing empty soulless whores have got just the thing for you, name me an emotion, for example, distraught?

why don't you try some vacuous horse fodder like linkin park? or evanescence? or any white boy middle class rich kid music? such as simple fucking plan?

what happened to all the great artists like christie front drive, or braid, or texas is the reason, or gameface? i'll tell you what happened, they got fucking choked to death by the aforementioned corporate whores

back to the point. do these bands and songs really mean something to you?

they do?

awesome. you'll rebel by getting ace grades at college and become part of the system you thought you were smashing

and by the way, i'm not claiming to be "dangerous" or a little "edgy", if i've ever smashed a system, its because i've accidentally knocked it off a shelf.

fuck the plastic music industry. want to tap into a mood? well lucky you cause i've just heard that apple's latest addition to the ipod range can do just that

i don't begrudge anybody's personal music tastes, i just don't get it

i'm listening to reggie and the full efect just in case you wondered
Comments: (1)

i wish you would take my radio to bathe with you
Date: Sep 11th, 2005 9:44:11 am - Subscribe
Mood: insecure

ooh, i have fans.... people who are actually interested in what i have to say

wish a certain ex bandmate was.


apparently he quit because "you and jon never listen to me" and my favourite, "i've always been a metalhead at heart"

not true

and i was the last to know.


some best friend eh?

on a happier note....

i'm still alive

AND we got our alkaline trio tickets the other week.

they had better play "continental", or else....

what am i listening to i hear you yawn?

well mainly emanuel and "war all the time" by thursday

stay tuned for another thrilling instalment y'all
Comments: (3)

lie to me for the very last time
Date: Sep 3rd, 2005 5:16:10 am - Subscribe
Mood: disturbed

why do it?

its not as if its lying per se, its just confusing, its like having a filter on your life, things i "dont need to know about".

you showed me your bleeding, weeping open sores, but the bruises you want to keep to yourself.

essentially, i'm a private person, so don't ask me anymore

you know what the answer will be

Comments: (1)

a poinsetta in poison rain
Date: Sep 3rd, 2005 4:57:27 am - Subscribe
Mood: alone

you'd think that i would have achieved completeness by now, but there is always some(one)thing in the way.

i guess its my nature to protect and eradicate any threat to my happiness.

just once i'd like to be able to relax completely and totally, but i can't.

you know what i did when i first came here?

checked all available escape options in case i was threatened, and by threatened i don't mean physically

guess its paranoia

pain travels at a rate of 350 feet per second

i wonder how fast hate travels?

on a prettier subject, our love is getting more beautiful every day, she's better than codeine for my pain, i love her so fucking much. i know she has doubts about the way i feel sometimes but i'd give her everything she ever asked for

this is possibly the least vague blog i ever wrote

seems the clouds are lifting.....
Comments: (3)

cut out the cancer
Date: Sep 2nd, 2005 2:34:21 pm - Subscribe
Mood: doomed

just dislocate it from yourself, its like a noose around your neck. trust me, it'll drive a wedge right into the heart of all this

and it'll be all my fault
Comments: (1)

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