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Hiya ^_^ Again...today has become remarkably better than when compared to just a few days ago. It's funny how destroyed I can be one moment and then how content I can be the next. But I shouldn't complain. After all staying the in the same state of sorrow and despair can become quite tiring on one's thoughts. I consider it toxic really.

So I woke up this morning at around 7 to get ready to go to Jackson with my Mom. I had invited Brett since he said he wanted to go ( I would have invited ya too Marle but you mentioned having plans with Travis. We shall go ourselves sometime!) so I got ready within record time in case he showed up early. It got around 8:30, the time when we were supposed to leave, and Brett still haven't appeared. So I thought about how Brett reacts to the early hours of the morning and decided to call his cell, and sure enough I woke him up xD He made me decide whether or not he was going to go back to sleep or get up and go...which I hated! I don't like making decisions for people! We gave him 20 minutes or so to get a shower and drove by to pick him up, then we were on our way. He and I spent most of the ride beating each other's scores on my Donkey Kong Country II and making sneaky lunges for each other's noses, but at one point ym Mom stopped on the side of the road and asked if I would dump a little of her bottle water on the windshield to help her get rid of the streaks. I did it the first time and she cleaned her windshield pretty good, but then she asked me to do it again. I was a bit confused but I did as she asked and then she tried FLINGING WATER ON ME -squeaks- Her and Brett were laughing so I ran back into the shelter of the back seat and gave them both properly stern glares xD

We got to the mall and goofed around a bit, but eventually Brett and I dropped by this new coffe shop and we got these iced mochas. I'm not wild about mocha in the first place but I thought I'd give it a try. It was horrible! Brett couldn't even drink it. SO we threw them away before they were even half finished and continued our journey. It was fun goofing off around the mall with him ^_^ I think I spent more time trying to kick his ass and keep my own covered than I did looking at stuff. But at least I had fun! I even spoiled him with Magic cards and a magazine ^.^ I love to give people stuff...it's a wierd compulsion of mine. Hey! You like that $1,000,000 rock on that shelf? Well here ya go! Ka-ching!

We eventually ended up at Best Buy where I was immediately enthralled by the concept that so many electronics could be piled in the same space. So I dashed from aisle to aisle with him patiently towing in behind me until I came upon the computer section. o.o -utter engrossment- Shiny things! Shiny things!

And now I have a brand new computer. -grin- I've wanted one for a while now, and since my Mother said it would be alright so long as I paid for it I just couldn't resist any longer. My Dad has yet to catch on...I dread the moment he figures it out ;_; He was completely against the suggestion I get me a new one. But it's the HP a720n model...coming to about $800/900 with a decent monthly payment. I may have to quit kickboxing...but I'm going to try and hold on to that class. Even if I do I'll join back in college with the kickboxing elective. I think the buying computer process bored Brett but he remained patient until the end ^_^ Compelled me to buy him more Magic cards when we went to Books A Million afterward.

Then we went home. I don't mean to make it sound so frivilous because indeed it wasn't...but my hands hurt. And I'm extremely tired. So I'mma gonna go -waves- Toodles!
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Mood: keen
munchinmunchies: Nothing. I gotta change this option.

82poptarts Strong Dec 30th, 2004 1:12:22 am - Subscribe
I think I'm better now...at least as good as you can be when something like that happens. I stayed awake last night instead of falling asleep and thought hard about what I should do. How I should act around him now that things have changed. The change of rules is odd to comprehend but I finally accepted that I just can't be selfish anymore. If he doesn't want me then there's nothing I can do about it and I'll just have to suck it up.

This solution is by far easier to think about that to actually do.

I started off the day pretty much bummed but managed to get through work (all 1.5 hours of it) and headed back home. My family had left for Jackson while I was gone so I was home alone, and after wandering through my house for a bit I decided that I should quit wasting time and at least get a shower. Basically I had a alot of time this morning to think. So I got out of the shower and immediately someone starts knocking at the door and after wrapping my head in a messy turban I answer it, expecting it to be anyone but him. But I'm normally wrong about things ^_^;; Brett and Baker have the wierdest timing ever. After feeling awkward for a second or two I let them in and they dragged in a collection of Magic cards, and after showing Baker the Dragonology book Marle gave me they played a few games.

At first I set a limit on just how friendly I was going to be with him...but my resolutions are about as strong as my luck with electronics. Weak. We messed around for a little while [which was when I really began crumbling] until my family returned and then went out for ice cream just before kick boxing (-genius-), but before we could leave Kortni pulled up. So she went, too ^_^ With about 10 minutes left before kick boxing we were still at the gas station goofing off so we decidedly to skip the class >_< I feel so bad! Then we went back to my house and Kortni and I watched Brett, Logan, and Baker all play Halo II. My resolution completely fell through a big frigging hole in the floor then. So I gave up trying to be on my best behavior and just acted like I used to. And I felt better after doing so.

It's times like these that I realize I'm completely, utterly pathetic. xD

So we'll see how tomorrow goes. I want to make everything alright for everyone, but first I have to sort my own problems. Still a long road...but after today I've upgraded my journey ahead with thoughts of an MP3 player to entertain me.
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Mood: uncertain
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82poptarts So Sick. And Empty, too. Dec 29th, 2004 1:12:01 am - Subscribe
...I'm so sick of almost loosing control. Of feeling like my heart has been ripped out of my chest just for the hell of someone being bored. He's gone again. Out of reach. But now that I think about it he probably was out of my reach the entire time.

The pain I feel inside is a mix of confusion and utter sadness. It's almost worse than when it was with James. Smiling feels like death...but I'd rather die than let him know the hole he's dug inside of me. I've got to hang on. If I don't then what else do I have other than my old tendencies of depression? It's not a matter of WHO I have to rely on. I have close friends who would do anything for me (of which I'm very grateful). Rather...it's what part of me can I depend on. Can I be strong enough?

I can't afford to hope. I have to make myself.

There's a long road ahead.
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Mood: destroyed
munchinmunchies: Nothing.

82poptarts \'Bout Time Dec 27th, 2004 1:47:57 am - Subscribe
Feh! My Internet's been down for the past few days so I haven't had time to update. Otherwise I would have because I'm a loser like that. I finally went crazy today and complained to my Mom about being bored so we cleaned Logan's room while dancing around to her new Rod Stewart cd (wtf?). After we got done she offered to help me clean my room...but it's always clean. So she said something about rearranging it and I said that was impossible. My furniture is just stuck. BUT she insisted so we got to working >:)

So now my room is completely different! I worked 10 or so minutes on PSP 8 just making a diagram of it...but now I don't want to load it up. So I'm not. Trust me though -nods- It's different.

And at some point my Internet fixed itself when I rehooked the coards together. (Yes. My desk moved.) So now I can surf the net once more! Though I should be reading ^_^;;;;;

My Christmas went very well despite me not being able to drive and get out of the house a few days prior to that. I thought I was going to go crazy! It seems that went I have freedom I don't go anywhere, but when I'm trapped inside I feel cooped up and just want to go. But a few of my goodies have kept my mind at bay :3 Here are some of my faves:

Game Boy Advance SP
with Spyro, Spyro 2, and Donkey Kong Country 2

Tommogatchi! Connection

Sony Net MD MP3 Player (though I haven't used it yet)

Purple shoulder massager (yah! -swoon-)

Neopets [Gelert] Voice Activated Pet

Stinga the AquaPet

Victoria's Secret flannel/cotton pj set

5 pairs of jeans

Mulan SE DVD (watched 2x already xDD -loser)

DAWN OF THE DEAD DVD(!!!!!!!!!!)

That's not all of it of course, but those are the first things that pop into mind. I was very pleased and thankful for my parents by the end of the day. I got my Dad this bronze Marine bust and when he opened it he actually started crying -lip quiver- I HATE it when he starts crying because then I get all choked up and I start hiccuping xD But he loved it. He said he was going to search the house for a perfect place to put it and he hasn't quite found it yet. He wants it to fit in with the surroundings but also be very visible for him to look at 24/7. My Mom forgot I got her the FoM pillow -shakes her head- So she was happy with that and hasn't really put it down yet. Logan has gone crazy with the Magic cards I got him ^_^ He's already got decks built up. Brett's parents got me this really cool artbook with a new sketchpad and watercolor pencils but I haven't had a chance to try them out yet. I shall make a point to do so ASAP. He and Baker are coming over tomorrow to teach Logan, Derek, and I how to play Magic even though I've got it somewhat learned.

Oh! On Christmas morning after we got done unwrapping we (my Mom, Logan, and I) went into the kitchen to try out out new house shoes. She'd gotten us some that had these little heating gel packs that slid over the top to heat our feet and had massagers in the heel. We couldn't run the massager because it needed batteries...which we didn't have. She was kinda sad over that, but we reassured her that it was fine ^_^ So she popped his heating pack in the micro and we started chit chatting when I paused and told everyone to hush. This crackling noise was getting louder and louder, then I yelled something about the heat pack and then BOOM! xDDDDD It EXPLODED!!! She had read the directions and thought "2 seconds" was "2 minutes", and she thought that was too long she she put it in for a minute. The max was 10 seconds. So she not only forgot the batteries but she blew up his gel packs. But it was too hilarious for her to be sad about it.

And that is the genius of my family.

I better go now ^_^ Entry is getting kinda long and I don't want to take any chance of it getting deleted by my Internet going Kapoof. -waves- Toodles!
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Mood: loving
munchinmunchies: Nothing

82poptarts Improve Dec 22nd, 2004 8:52:57 pm - Subscribe
Hiya ^_^ Luckily (for most of us) my day was far better than it was yesterday. I woke early in plans to go to Jackson with Marle, but unfortunately the sleet stopped me at the front door. I gave her a call, got a shower, and assumed my proper place sitting my rumpus before the mighty computer. I was fooling around with the virus for a little while before I started doodling this magic card that I had saved on my favorites, and I happened to glance up and see a message blinking on my screen.

Twas the Bretticus. o__O He actually started a conversation.

He asked what I was doing and then said he was coming over, but since he couldn't use his truck he was just going to walk. -makes a braking noise- No no! Then he slyly said he was going on brb and to expect a phone call sometime, but after he was gone...oh about 30 MINUTES I figured he had just slipped off since I said I would come pick him up instead of him walking. Sure enough his Mom called and said that he insisted on walking to my house. So I coaxed my Mom into taking a road trip, and armed with a hot pack and my winter "gear" we went toward his house. Guess who we found making his dear sweet way along the road? xDD We picked him up and brought him to my house. However shortly after someone got stuck on the curb, so we all had to pile back outside and shove it out of the ditch. There were two people in there...one of them a large black man who did nothing to help us o.x We got them out and I ran all the way home because I WAS FREEZING!

After the epidemic we just hung out a little while, though I was disappointed because I knew that the plans for tonight's part had been cancelled. There was no way my family was going to let me out tonight. But maybe tomorrow will be different since it won't be sleeting ^_^

So all in all it was a nice day. His Dad picked him up at around 5 which was much earlier than I'm used to, but I'm hoping we can hang out tomorrow as well. We didn't talk about Kendra or what happened (we have yet to discuss that much) but I didn't want to chance ruining the calmness. I'm just grateful that things really haven't seemed to change between us ^.^ Toodles! -kicks Marle and takes her gd phrase back- xD
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Mood: better
munchinmunchies: Chips and Ranch Dip x9

82poptarts Void Dec 22nd, 2004 12:13:22 am - Subscribe
And I don't know whether to be hopeful or just aloof. His actions are so puzzling that they startle...but I fear that this is just the beginning of a long series of unfortunate events.

Hiya ^_^ If people don't understand the beginning of this entry then it's none of your business. Not to be frank/rude/mean or anything. Today started off pretty boring...waking up, cleaning, sitting around the house and whatnot. I figured Brett wouldn't be over because he had a hair appointment, but I tidied my living space "just in case". Then Kortni called and rattled on about a few things, some seriously amusing and others informative, and we decided to go to the movies with the Quad Sqaud. Rebecca was in Jackson with her Mum so we were waiting for her to return, then I discovered Marle was at work -gasps!- So we had to wait for her, too. We were going to exchange presents you see -nodsnods-

So Rebecca dropped straight by my house when she got back from Jackson, but she didn't know about the plans yet. After informing her she called Kortni (who was a bit peeved she didn't come straight home) and decided to stay at my house. Kortni came and we waited to call for Marle, but unfortunately she was in trouble because she didn't get home on time and wasn't able to come. SO we exchanged gifts and I got my manga (FY 4) and shoelaces with little red stars on them. Then later Marle called and said that indeed she could come, but Rebecca decided to go home since she had already seen Lemony Snicket's and Kortni headed onward to get some gas. The three of us went and saw the movie, where I received some very depressing news that affected me so badly I didn't even have the appetite to eat my popcorn that I had bought ~_~ After the movies we exhcnaged gifts with Marle and she got me this awesome Dragonology book which I am already consuming myself in. I like it bunches!

The movie itself was pretty good...I just wish I had been in a cheerful mood when I was in the theatre. But I didn't want to spoil everyone else's good time so I just grit my teeth and beared it ^_^ It's not good to be selfish.

So I went to Wal-mart (after Movies to Go) with Marle and tried to return my Zoo Tycoon II but they wouldn't take it since the seal was broken. Which I figured because it was a computer thing but...I wanted that $40 back. So I bought the GodSmack "Awake" cd instead and spent more money xD That always solves money problems. Marle did her best to lighten my mood (and I highly appreciated it) but nothing can really help but time. And explanation.

But I better go now ^_^ I hope you all have a good night!
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Mood: hopeless
munchinmunchies: Nothing.

82poptarts My Abs Hurt Dec 20th, 2004 2:24:14 am - Subscribe
Well today was interesting ^_^ Despite the fact that my ass is freezing off and I'm caccooning myself in my robe to survive the night seems strangely satisfying.

I started off the day pretty later after waking up at around 11:30 (oops) and decided that I'd better get a shower and such in case Brett and the others dropped by. I didn't want them to see all the lovliness of me in my t shirt from the boy's department in wally world and fluffy house shoes with my glasses on crooked and my hair all tussled after all x_x That would be worse than death itself!

...Sorta.

So after getting ready my Mom coaxed me into going to work and finishing my rooms up while she toted stuff out to the car, and then I delightedly freshened my love of cleaning by picking up after ladies who thought it'd be hilarous to dump their paper shredder on the floor. Cause I was too lazy to drag my vac. cleaner up the stairs. After about an hour we headed home and sure enough his red truck was parked in my yard. Ah! Finally something to look forward to in my afternoon! I went in and was amused by the expression of boredom on Brett's face as Logan chattered and Derek continually stated the obvious, but my Mom relieved us by offering to give a trip to Wal-Mart. You ever notice a pattern of me going there? Anywho! I chased him around the aisles for a little while before I heard my name and whipped backward and saw Marle. ANOTHER PATTERN! She always finds me xDD We hung out for a bit before my Mom paged us and we left.

Then Brett announces that his Mom wanted me to go have dinner with them.

O_O

I agreed of course, so after wrapping the last of my Mom's gifts in the shop we headed out for his house. His Mom complained she had gotten a headache earlier so I getting off to a late start. I offered to help her and she gave me a weird look xDD Guess she's not used to that. She said she could handle it so we headed off to his room and watched The Grinch and rummaged through his Magic Cards. I was suprised by how much he likes that movie. It is really funny though -nods- I might have to buy it sometime. Supper was served after a short time (with him bellowing "how much longer?!") and we got our plates. Instead of eating at the table though we went to his room and ate on these little tv trays and watched more of the movie. We had chicken and dumplings, toast, and brocolli with cheese. I actually ate all of it xD The brocolli wasn't horrible like I thought it'd be, but it's not my favorite veggie all of a a sudden either. The food was really good though ^_^ I enjoyed it. We cleaned our plates, finished the movie, and then I got little wallets of some of his senior photos -squeaks- And they are now mine forever! He was tickling my feet (while laying in the floor) while his Mom was sitting beside me on the bed and showing me all this pictures and I kept appologizing because I would compulsively twitch and bump my shoulder into her -dies-

After a little while we went to get ice cream and then spent the rest of the time at my house. At some point he decided it would be nice to try on my pink high heels I got yesterday. Uber hilariousness. He crammed his foot in there and started writhing because it crushed his toes, then I litterally dragged him around my room trying to pry them off. They wouldn't budge! He was screaming, I was laughing, and nothing got accomplished. My Brother had to litterly rip them off his feet. He was moaning and clutching his feet when I just slipped my foot in and traspied around him in triumph. Aha! So my abs hurt from laughing the whole time I was with him. Hence my title.

So the night went pretty well to me. I didn't mess up (according to me) with the parents and behaved the best I could, and then I got pictures that I've been seeking for ages. ^_^ But I'm going to go now -luffs- Bye bye!
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Mood: peachy
munchinmunchies: Nothing

82poptarts Long Ass Update Dec 19th, 2004 2:21:51 am - Subscribe
Hiya ^_^ I'm up past my bedtime (pbbt) and decided that I really need to update since I've been lacking in that responsibility as of late. I eve made a list as to what all I need to include in this entry -points to the list which she will delete upon posting-

Well first thing's fist: SCHOOL IS OUT FOR CHRISTMAS! -dances in utter joy- I didn't think I was going to make it that last day ;_; We had this huge assignment slammed on us in AP English that was due Friday so that was the big part of it. We had to get in these groups and write an assortment of periodicals and my group picked the entertainment magazine since it seemed easy (which it was...just long) and guess who got stuck with putting it together? x_x No one in my group even knew that Windows Word could be formatted with pictures and such that went behind the text -dies!- So I was assistant editor. An assitant editor that took al the pictures, reformatted the entries, put them into English text, and then put the damn thing together while printing it. Here's the most annoying part of my story.

It still wasn't done Thursday morning so Thursday night I went to kickboxing with Marle and decided that I would go to Kortni/Becca's and try to print it off after doing a few more graphics to fill up the pages. Brett ended up coming around the end of the class (bum xD) and I realized that I had left my disks at my house, so after the class we ran to get them (I beat Brett racing...while riding down the middle of the road. Hah!) and when we drove up, Marle's face just kinda went pale. Evidently while we were gone and her car was pulled into the side of my yard Brett had gotten bored and decided to car foam her vehicle O_O It had lots of "ha ha"s on it, and after she attempted to pummel him [while he laughed hysterically] we went and got my stuff and headed for Kortni/Becca's while he followed. When we got there I had ran upstairs because Becca was gone but had mentioned earlier that I could use her computer to print the stuff off which was obviously a horrible thing to do according to Kortni angry.gif She came bouncing up the stairs lecturing me because she had gone to so much trouble to sit on her ass in the office and watch tv just so I could get on the computer in there. So after she went on and on about how thoughtless I was (BAH) she eventually made her merry way downstairs again with Marle while Brett stayed in Becca's brightass room with me while I tried to upload my stuff. She doesn't have word. Mission failed.

So I went back downstairs and tried my luck there while avoiding the urge to knock Kortni over while she assumed the duty of mocking me about not being downstairs in the first place again. Brett went home while we were working and eventually Rebecca came home from her concert and told us about all the mean stuff she did and how she decided to have fun ^.^ I stayed there until 11ish and brought Marle back to my house so she could take her poor car to get it washed before her Dad saw it all covered in the stuff. Then I decided to pull an all-nighter because I didn't have hardly any of the project done and Rebecca said that I could finish printing in Mrs. Stacy's room before school Friday. Because she had color.

A whole night of graphic orientation and english writing went into place and at around 5:00 I decided to get a power nap, not even bothering to unmake my bed (thus freezing my bum off). I woke up, clumsily stuffed a jell-o thing down my throat and chugged a glass of sweet tea, straightened my hair, and grabbed my stuff. Then I left and went to school. For the last day before Christmas =^_^= I ran down the hall with Becca to print the stuff off, but unfortunately Mrs. Stacy didn't have color ink. Twas alright with me though because I was happy she would let me print it. I put the disk in and clicked on my precious title graphic that I was very proud of and narrowed my eyes supiciously when half of it was dark. Very obscured dark. Then I started feeling a buzzing emotion of rage when it printed that way. NOTHING GOES RIGHT FOR ME!!!! It printed all funky but at least the following pages printed in black and white ok. Feeling very pitiful I went to AP class and was thankful we didn't have to present them because frankly I was ashamed of mine ~_~ At least my friends stood up for me and assured my group that I was worked my ass off -snugs-

Anywho the day went off as normal but Rebecca felt ill during second period [foods] and kept complaining about her throat being to sore to even touch. Wierd. The Appolo Show was going on but I didn't go because I'm a bum like that and I was asked not to go anyway. Noah messaged me that night and asked if I had been there and when I said no he said I should have so I could have cheered him on -gag- I left work early because I was too tired to do my job right, but when I got home Brett came over and all plans for sleeping were cancled ^_^ Not like I minded though! I hadn't seem him during school because he was in kind of an ill mood...but I was glad that he was in better spirits when I saw him -nodsnods-

He brought Baker with him and presented me with 3 mighty beans xDD He said he felt bad because two of my three had gotten lost sometime in the numerous wrestles for them and decided to clepto me some more. I thought it was nice that he remembered me mentioning them being lost. We decided to go to his house to meet Seth and watch Sevenas well as for them to play Magic, but no one paid attention to the movie at all. I was sitting on his bed when all of a sudden and rummaged around his little Christmas tree (which was decorated with funny little ornaments btw) and gave me this bag and told me Merry Christmas. o.O Early! I opened it and he had gotten me this little wrist watch with black bands and a black face, and then he got me this green earring and necklace set that's very pretty ^.^!! I love it -shows watch- He got Baker and Brandon some magic cards and they spent the rest of the night playing with them. They had the windows pulled up so I hid under a few blankets and struggled to stay awake with Brett suprise attacking me every now and then to make sure I remained alert o.x At one point his Mom came in and waved at us, demaning the windows be put back down and being refused shortly after her command. She's pretty funny ^_^

So I went home at around 11 and went immediately to bed. Saturday I woke up at around 11 (12 hours wooo) and got a shower, then visited with the family while my Mom impatiently asked me when Brett was coming by. She wanted him to come so he would go with us shopping in Union City but I kept telling her I didn't know. So she decided to call his cell -laughs hysterically- She got bored and handed the phone to me, and he just told me to call him when we got back. So I went shopping...just before Christmas. The real purpose was to just get me jeans for her to wrap, but somehow that purpose was blurred and we got a few more things. I got these really cute pink high heel shoes and a nice green hoodie to match my earrings/necklace, then I got a nice yellow shirt. And lots of jeans!

I came back, called Brett, and had him over within a minute while we were unloading the car. He was there for a bit before Seth came over and we watched Banned From America where we were all disappointed. I thought it would be graphic, but Faces of Death is just better. The three of us went to Wal-mart but before we went there I stopped at Movies To Go and when I was dropping the movies off I heard someone call my name. When I looked up I saw Marle, Travis, and Caitlyn all trapsing down the stairs. Travis is a little cutied xDD And Brett will push me down when he reads that. We all talked for a little while before continuing the quest to Wally World, the we went to Brett's house and goofed off before calling Baker over. As soon as he came we all left for McDonalds, but by the time we got done eating it was 11 and I had to go home ;_; They were all staying the night at Brett's so they just dropped me off.

And that's all my update for now. Have your eyes fallen out of your head from reading yet?

...How about now?

-pokepoke-
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Mood: gleeful
munchinmunchies: Nothing

82poptarts Better Today Dec 12th, 2004 11:28:34 pm - Subscribe
Hiya ^_^ Well the day started off pretty boring, but it was immediately better than Saturday simply because I got good sleep last night. My Mom let my sleep on and off until 12ish, then she asked if I felt like going to Goodies. I knew if I said I'd go that she would end up spending a lot of money just before Christmas so I told her no and she decided that she didn't want to go either. Though I really wanted some more jeans...

Must resist temptation!

So anyway I was cleaning around the house when I caught the tail end of Jurassic Park I, thus invoking me to watch the 3rd since JP II was a disappointment. My Mom watched it with me, then she went to take a nap...cause people do that on Sundays. ^_^

After a while I got bored trying to configure this wierd CSS layout so I went and took Dillon for a walk to try and help my sinuses. It was cold. Anywho, after about 10 minutes of meandering around my front yard and dodging Sissy a red truck came up in my driveway. It twas the Bretticus xD I coaxed Dillon back to his lead and went inside to good off with him, Logan, and Derek. Brett made up for not showing yesterday by watching Blade II with me so Saturday was all forgotten ^.^ Though I wasn't mad about it in the first place. I also asked and found out he wasn't mad at me at all and that he had been mad at this kid at the paintball competition because he didn't get paid for the kid renting his stuff. Ninney!

So the four of us had a pretty good time. I would have called Marle but I figured she was with Travis. Which after reading her journal I figured out that she indeed had not...-pouts- Poo.

We shall punish him.

CHRISTMAS BREAK IS IN 4.5 MORE DAYS OMG OMG OMG OMG -combusts-
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Mood: cheery
munchinmunchies: 32 ou. water bottle

82poptarts Don\'t Know Where to Turn Dec 11th, 2004 11:02:07 pm - Subscribe
So I'm confused as hell, somewhat irritated at myself, and sick with the common cold. This weekend is just...spiffy. o.x

I went to Santa's Village early this morning after getting the silch amount of sleep and mixed up my time so I was there 30 minutes early. Not like I had anything to do anyway. So I browsed around a few stands when they began opening and waited for Rebecca to get there, and in that time I purchased this antique ornament and had it personalized with "Moma" since I'm retarded and can't spell (that's the way I've always spelt it). I also had the lady put 2004 and a little heart with "EB" inside of it. Since I didn't want to give it to her on Christmas I gave it to her later in the day and she seemed to like it real well ^.^ I love to give her things. I love to give everyone things.

But anyway Rebecca came and we worked at the back entrance clicking people in as they came and directing them constantly to the covered wagon ride. And we got to stare at a blank wall for 2 hours. After 20 minutes I thought I was going to cry ;_; It was so boring. We entertained ourselves by messing with Rebecca's cell phone and doodling on the entertainment sheets, and eventually we were rewarded by being released from our table. They even took our chairs from us so we had to stand for an hour! -dies- Marle and Kortni relieved us from our duties and we moved on to the can drive, but it turned out that there were so many people that we weren't needed. Hoo ray! We shopped with my Mom a bit (though I bought more for me than others xD -bad-) and then parted and headed into the petting zoo.

I WANT A DAMN BUNNY -sobs-
Though my Father would eat it -sobs more-

We got hungry and decided to go get a quick bite of dinner, but on the way we stopped at Walden's so Rebecca could make good use of her money that she got from her Dad. Which was a bunch ^_^ I got the spark notes for The Prince so that was nice...now if I just wouldn't fall asleep while I read those. That book is unconceivably boring.

But when we ran to Taco Bell I gave a quick call home to see if Brett had decided to come by and Logan said he'd called, so I called him on his cell to see what he wanted. He mentioned being pissed (but I didn't ask what) and that he wanted to come over to my house when I got home, so I told him that I would be back in around 30 minutes. So I hung up and we ate, then I went home.

And waited.
...and waited.

After about 3 hours I figured he wasn't coming so I started to read the spark notes and fell asleep on the couch. Rebecca decided to drop by with Quint to watch the Poo Song on my computer and she litteraly woke me up while she was in mid air leaping for me. I had actually drooled on my shoulder! -dies- They watched the song and skimmed around a few funny things on my computer before going on the merry way, and then I was tidying up the house when she called just after leaving my driveway and told me Brett was at Kendra's house. >_< I must have gotten his message confused (...and was it bad that I was somewhat disappointed?). Either that or he's actually pissed at me and just didn't feel like coming over and chewing me out -sighs- Though I hope that's not it. I messaged Kendra a second ago and she said she was hanging out so I guess he's still there and doesn't plan on coming over after all. I don't wanna call his cell and bother him just to ask a stupid question ^_^

Now it's 10:00 and I've gotten a shower even though I should finish exercising. I really need to get started on that periodical assignment.

Bye bye! ^_^
0 Comments
Mood: unsure
munchinmunchies: Nothing

82poptarts Urk Dec 11th, 2004 8:27:19 am - Subscribe
Blegh! I had intended this weekend to be a period of "catching up" so to speak, but instead of getting rested to prepare for the final week of school before Christmas Break I'm being assaulted by germs.

Yes. I, Emily, have caught yet another cold.

-sneezes-

Last night I tried going to bed at around 2 because I knew that I was going to have to get up at 9 anyway to volunteer at Santa's Village, but every time I laid my head back I would start coughing and my nose would clog so I'd nearly choke to death. (I know this is SO glamorous) So finally I got into a kind of half sleep where I woke up every 10 freaking minutes. I slept on an off for about an hour...maybe an extra 30 minutes somewhere in there. Then I woke up for the billionth time with Dillon sitting on my chest and licking my face because he wanted outside. ~_~ I just said screw it and got up. Then the draining from standing up followed and I hacked'wheezed my way to the frigid barren outside before finding refuge in the house.

I was in a crappy mood because I loathe being sick, but I decided to turn on the Christmas lights outside and on the tree, then relaxed watching the little village on the table and all it's merry glory xD I'm such a dork. Christmas is soothing though...it's truely my favorite holiday. It's definately the most decorated one. Then I turned off the village (but I left the other lights on just cause I felt like it) and poured me a huge glass of sweet tea, popped some medicine, and cleaned my room. Once more I prove myself as a dork by taking pleasure in cleaning. I'd tackle the aquarium because God knows it needs a cleaning ["Mother's job"] but I just don't have the energy.

Now I have to look forward to volunteering at Santa's Village in about 3 hours just to stand at the door. Then I have to quit that 30 minutes before scheduled and sort through the giant pile of cans for the needy. I'm supposed to go to Hwag's Christmas Party...but I honestly don't think I'm up to it. And is it polite to go and spread germs since I'll be eating there? I don't think so. But I'll see how I feel later today ^_^ Maybe if I don't go I can rest some tonight, but if Brett pops over then I'll start PotC since he promised that if I was sick or quadraplegic that he'd come over and watch it with me. Only if he feels like hanging out with a sick person though.

Oh! Speaking of, I got to chat some with Brett's moma last night xDD She was under his user name trying to fix his computer, and when I messeged him I asked whether or not he was hiding on away or if he was actually at Seth's, and eventually I got the reply "he's at Seth's". And then "When am I going to meet you?" O_O I was pretty confused so I asked who it was, and then she told me so we started talking back and forth. Basically she was trying to fix his Norton thing because 37(?) of his files were at risk and I gave her suggestions of new anti virus software. Then she asked if I knew how to find the registry keys. I did not ;_;

But I searched and finally found a really good site with instruction and gave it to her so she thanked me bunches and mentioned that she wanted to meet me someday ^.^ I was glad to help and that she seemed to like me okie dokie. Though Brett will have a heart attack and probably disown me as soon as he reads this -sniffles- Cause anything his Mom likes is untouchable.

I _finally_ got all of my RPG posts caught up to -relieved-

I better go now! Bye bye! -snugs all-
0 Comments
Mood: crummy
munchinmunchies: Sweet tea count?

whiplash I\'m drawing a blank. Dec 8th, 2004 11:08:30 pm - Subscribe
I stole from you
That last breath you drew
And finally found a way
To die today

I wish I was more 'poetic.' I s'pose my poetry is decent, but it really isn't public-worthy. Oh, well.

Yep. That's about it for this entry.

Oh, yeah. What the hell is 'lackdaisical'? I saw it as a mood and automatically chose it. I hope it doesn't mean something like aroused. Or intoxicated. Because I'm lacking in both categories at the moment.

xoxo-Marle
1 Comments
Mood: lackadaisical
munchinmunchies: Nuttin\'.

whiplash High of 75 Dec 8th, 2004 12:35:38 pm - Subscribe
Blah. I'm always getting a song stuck in my head. And here lately, it's been 'High of 75' by Relient K. So, considering that I know all of the lyrics to the song, I'm going to post it in here. Maybe it'll drive it out of my head. Or may cause 'Video Killed the Radio Star' to get stuck in my head in place of it. >:E

We were talkin' together; I said, "What's up with this weather?"
Don't know whether or not how said I just got was on my own volition or if I'm just missin' the sun

And tomorrow I know will be rainy at best
And the forecast I know is that I'll be depressed
But I'll wait outside hopin' that I'll catch sight of the sun

Because on and off the clouds have fought for control over the sky
And lately the weather has been so bipolar, and consequently so have I

But now I'm sunny with a high of 75, since you took my heavy heart and made it light
And it's funny how you find you enjoy your life when you're happy to be alive

And the temperature is freezing, and then after dark, there's a cold front sweeping in over my heart
And we might break up if I don't wake up to the sun

Because on and off the clouds have fought for control over the sky
And lately the weather has been so bipolar, and consequently so have I

But now I'm sunny with a high of 75, since you took my heavy heart and made it light
And it's funny how you find you enjoy your life when you're happy to be alive

But now I'm sunny with a high of 75, since you took my heavy heart and made it light
And it's funny how you find you enjoy your life when you're happy to be alive

-pants.- Okay. I think I'm done. I just HAD to get that out of my head and onto, well, my blog. o_O;;

Travis and I held hands again walking to 3rd period. =DDDD Wow, he's so darn cute. xD He looks really spiffy today. He looks so good in green. He has really blue eyes, too. They contrast against his hair, and just...wow. O_O;;

He asked for my e-mail address and I gave it to him, while telling him not to make fun of it since it was 4-5 years old, and I hadn't bothered to get a cooler-sounding e-mail account. But he still made fun of me for having an underscore in my address. -_-;; -loser.- He also have me his e-mail, and it's pretty friggin' long. o_O;; I think I may e-mail him just to say 'hi.' xD

Emy has been explaining to me about how Kendra deleted her LiveJournal. She's such a chicken. -growls.- Kendra's acted like such an IDIOT. She hasn't even allowed Emy to explain herself about anything. -sighs.- Whatever.

I had to go to Travis's homeroom to get his e-mail address, and when I went in there, I saw Kayla and Emily (from work). Kayla immediately told me to go away (xD), and Emily was like, "Omigosh, Marlena! I got a flat tire yesterday!" and started telling me about how she thought it sounded like a helicopter landing as it was going flat. o_O;;; Those two are something else.

Damn you, Brett. Your entry is confusing. angry.gif;;

Wow. Really long entry. -cuts.-

xoxo-Marle
2 Comments
Mood: Pondering
munchinmunchies: Chedder Chex Mix

82poptarts Going Crazy Dec 8th, 2004 12:54:43 am - Subscribe
So I go to check Ms. Ray O Sunshine's journal and I can't read it. I check a few minutes later and it still pulls up a missing page. I start worrying that my internet is down (or my journal sites) so I start navagating my way around the web looking for any trouble. I find none. I can go anywhere on the net just fine...but no sign of girlygirl.

And I start to wonder...

I check the URL again and find nothing wrong despite the fact it won't take me to the journal. Then I search for the journal and get the same missing page link. I'm really worried now and start racing through my friends' archives. No entires by her although she made one today...

Then I check my friend's list and see her name crossed out.

SHE DELETED HER JOURNAL.
OR BLOCKED ME ONE.

And I'm going insane. I'm frantically scourgning through the depths of google in search of her replacement journal because I KNOW she's made one. I'm briefly aware that I shouldn't be so fanatic about it...but within this link I can't know how she feels about me. But considering the nostalgic lines of "I hate her" I think I already know.

The search will continue.
3 Comments
Mood: tormented
munchinmunchies: Nothing

82poptarts Weekly Forecast Dec 7th, 2004 7:02:32 pm - Subscribe
Hiya ^_^ Nothing much has happened today thus far, but later I'm heading off to kickboxing with Kortni and Marle...then La Cabana -dances- I'm not sure if Brett is coming or not but I suppose he has his own things to do -nods- Even if he isn't I'm still going with him to see Blade III so that'll be neat. I hope the movie turns out to be as good as I'm thinking it will be ^_^ That series is awesome.

Scrubbing away at the baseboards at work is hard o.x I spent some of this afternoon doing it for work but so long as I get paid I guess it doesn't really matter. Then Thursday I have to skip kickboxing because we all have to work at my Mom's office party. There's just four of us (Marle, Kortni, Rebecca, and I) for it but between serving and such we should get pretty good tips. Too bad I have to clean the entire gym before the party begins...but I shouldn't fuss.

Tantrums are so unflattering.
Kendra should know this. -coughs-

I can't believe I only have Foods 8 more times and Government 7 ;_; Then Coach Bragg leaves and we get Coach Daily for Economics. At least I get Marle and Kortni in my Housing class xD We shall spend both 1st and 2nd period together then! Mrs. Merrit is going to implode by the time the year ends.

I better go now -nodsnods- I have to get changed. Bye bye!
0 Comments
Mood: energized
munchinmunchies: Just ate some sketti

whiplash Eee! Dec 7th, 2004 1:26:29 pm - Subscribe
I just thought I would write a little about my current situation with my new boyfriend, Travis. ^__^ He asked me just yesterday if I would like to go out with him. I said yes, of course. It was about bloody time! I had been waiting in anticipation for him to ask me. =D

Today after second period, I met up with him in the hallway and started walking beside him to our 3rd period class. Automatically, I crossed my arms in front of my chest just because I always do that. I like crossing my arms for some reason. o_O; Anyway, Travis seemed somewhat disgruntled, and I asked him what was wrong. He was like, "Can I ask you a question?" and I said yeah; he said, "Since we're official now...would it be all right if I held your hand?" I was like, O_O!! and I told him yes. XD So, we held hands going down the hallway. It felt kind of odd, holding someone else's hand, but I enjoyed it all the same. =)

Hooray! o_O;

xoxo-Marle
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Mood: blissful
munchinmunchies: Cheesecake

whiplash Another blog. o_o; Dec 7th, 2004 11:35:55 am - Subscribe
Here we go. Another blog. Go figure. I couldn't resist, though. It's one of my favorite pasttimes, looking up free blog hosting sites, and then signing up for a blog that I practically never use. I've been stickin' with InsaneJournal lately. It's just so darn easy to use. And besides, I've already got some friends in on it, as well. I'm just a nerd. =)
1 Comments
Mood: glowing
munchinmunchies: FlavorBlasted Goldfish

82poptarts Strawberries Dec 6th, 2004 11:59:29 pm - Subscribe
I'm listening to the old JOJ classic "Strawberry Gashes" so for no particular reason that's going to be my title. It reminds me of all the turmoil I went through a year or so ago...begins back unfond memories of me being a stupid, selfish twit. So no worries my pretties ^_^ There aren't any relapses on the horizen.

Today was pretty uneventful beyond 1st period. I fianlly got that bastard of a paper turned in and I'm amused by how little I care on whether or not I pass on that grade. It won't drag me below a B on my report card at least. And I DID work on it pretty hard...I just didn't fret too much. Which is a pretty big improvement considering my normal perfectionist ways! After that I went to Foods with Rebecca and together we smoted the younguns with our superior skills of completing out of the book worksheets...then in rehab I was doing nothing (with much merriment) when Mrs. Glover randomly asks if I can draw a fireplace.

[Me] >_>;;;; I...guess so?
[John] -snicker- Random request.

So off I go on my jolly quest to retrieve colorful paper from the library where Whitney was kind enough to assist me. I returned toting tons of paper on my shoulder with my hall pass rolled and tucked behind my ear, making lots of noise with the floppy underside of my old tennis shoes. I get back in the room and set my hallpass down on the table (noting that John snatches it immediately), progressing through my artistic plans with Mrs. Glover. Initially I wanted to do a brown background for the mantle and then put red paper on top to draw out bricks, then color the middle squares black to make the impression of the inside. After that I wanted to put yellow and red flames on that part to make fire. But Mrs Glover insisted that was too hard so she just wanted me to draw one on the brown paper.

...So why did I have to get the rest of the paper?

I went to grab my hall pass, expecting it to be laid out on my books or something, but then John "innocently" places a crumbled wad of blue on my book after grinning at me. My hallpass! I ran into Mrs. Elliot's room to grab a yard stick only to be presented with a flimsy ruler o.x Then the bell rang. So I was stuck through homeroom in Mrs. Glover's, horrified when I discover the homeroom class is ENTIRELY FRESHMEN! This guy comes and sits at the back table where I'm scribbling a life-sized fireplace and proceeds to talk to me though I have no idea who he is. Don't get hopeful ~_~ He wasn't a hottie. He went blabbering on about anime and such, then I decided to be conversational and I mentioned manga and he went o.o;; What's that?

AGH!

I explained what it was to the anime master -snort- By the time he understood he was pulling out sketches he had made and then offering over and over to help me if I needed it ;_; I just wanted to draw and be left alone really. But I was nice -murrs- He finally left after homeroom and then her 4th preiod class cam busting in. NO BETTER! These were all the juniors who think they're hot stuff -sobs- They kept babbling on and on until my ears felt like they were going to bleed, so I started frantically scribbling the rest of my outline, cut it out, and stapled the bitch to the bulletin board XDD And I ran to my computer class like I was on fire.

From there I was rescued by the good company of my friends.

Marle got asked out by Travis =^.^= I be so happy for her! After so long or not being able to even talk to him she's moved to far -luffs-

I'm also going to see Blade III:Trinity with Brett and Brandon -excited-

Dun have much more to say so...bye bye!

This penguin thing is so cute! xD
3 Comments
Mood: whimsical
munchinmunchies: Nothing but water