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| Andy's Last Words |
Jul 10th, 2005 2:49:58 am - Subscribe |
| This is Andy's cousin, I'll be posting his final words..Andy was like a brother to me, so I find this really difficult, but I want his friends to see. He passed away July 6th, due to internal bleeding...The doctors made us believe he was going to make it..Even Andy's smile had us convinced.. "I'm finding it difficult to believe this all happened..A car accident?...The last thing I remember was thinking of Charlie as I went to pick him up. Less than a mile left to reach his house...how could I not have made it? I was depressed, love-filled, so many emotions..and after that car hit mine...I felt nothing inside. To wake up and find Charlie in a bed beside me, completely unconcious...that was the most painful moment of my life. I didn't have it in me to speak, all I could do was lie there crying. My family and friends tried to explain what happened to him....I was furious, how could someone be so stupid? How could they possible make Charlie think I was dead? And then I find out who it was...My own stepfather told Charlie I was gone. He hated Charlie. He hated me. Most of all, he hated our relationship. He knew Charlie wouldn't take that news well, and he actually had the nerve to show up in our hospital room. If it weren't for the look on my mother's face, I would have made that man pay. He's lucky for my mother's love and unawareness of the situation. I'll never forgive him for hurting Charlie... I'm awaiting for Charlie to wake up. It feels like I've been waiting for an eternity, but it doesn't matter..I'll wait as long as it takes, I just want to know he's okay. Charlie is my only reason to live. Without him, I'd have taken my own life so long ago. I think I'll begin to finish this up..Its getting more difficult to continue writing. I've tried to put a smile on my face and convince everyone I'm okay. They've all had so much to worry about, I can't bare to add to that. Everyone is asking me how I feel and I have to lie every time. How can I tell them, "It hurts.", "I don't want to feel this way anymore. Just unhook the machines and let me go.", "I cry when none of you are here to see."? I can't..thats the thing. I'm going to continue to endure this though, for Charlie's sake as well as everyone else's, no matter how much its hurting me. I just need Charlie to wake up, I need to look in his eyes again and see that smile that makes all this pain worth dealing with... I think I just might make it. Everything is going to work out, and soon we'll all return to our normal lives...and I'll never take the love I've been given for granted again..." Andy did endure it for awhile longer...Only a few moments after Charlie woke up, Andy passed away. He saw that smile he wanted, but it wasn't enough to save him this time. I want to thank all of you who prayed for the health of Andy and Charlie. Although the prayers were not enough to save my cousin, I'm happy to say that Charlie is still with us today. A part of me is at rest though, because I know Andy will continue to watch us and his spirit will always live with us. |
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| mood: destroyed |
(6) comments |
| Andrew/Charlie Update |
Jul 4th, 2005 7:32:26 pm - Subscribe |
| This is Andrew's mother again. I thought I would try to keep friends of the boys updated on their condition. I'm happy to say that Andrew finally awoke this evening. Unfortunately, he's yet to speak a single word to us. When he awoke he saw Charlie and started crying. Since then he's been lying in bed silently watching Charlie for movement. Charlie's breathing continues to do well, but he's yet to awake. The doctors think he'll pull through, so we'll be waiting for signs of alert from him. |
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| mood: weak |
(4) comments |
| They're Still Alive... |
Jul 3rd, 2005 4:50:04 pm - Subscribe |
| This is Andrew's mother posting. There seems to be much confusion about the condition of my son and Charlie, so I'd like to try and clear things up. Both are currently undergoing medical treatment at the local hospital. They suffered serious injuries, but did not die, as some people were led to believe. Yesterday, shortly after 3AM, Andrew left to pick up Charlie at his residence. Less than a mile from Charlie's house, Andrew's car was hit by a drunk driver. The driver was killed in the crash while Andrew was knocked unconcious and left bleeding. A passerby called the hospital, whom attempted to contact me, but were unable to reach me for some reason. Andrew's aunt went to check on him and called some family members and friends, and somehow word reached Charlie that Andrew had passed away. As some of you may know, Charlie and Andrew were very close. Charlie was devistated by the news and took his father's gun. Less than an hour after Andrew's accident, Charlie lodged a bullet into his body. His little brother found him lying in a pool of blood and told his parents, whom called for an ambulence. Both recieved medical treatment and are currently sharing a room together. Neither of the boys have yet to wake up, but their breathing is steady. Please pray for a safe recovery for both young men...If you knew them in person, you would know why none of us here in Passau can bare the thought of losing them. |
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| mood: devastated |
(6) comments |
| You Could Be The One I'll Always Love |
Jul 3rd, 2005 3:25:23 am - Subscribe |
| I'm in one of those lame, "Oh, my god...No one understands poor little me!" moods. I get so depressed lately and I can't even stand myself anymore. I had a 'great' dream last night...It started with me alone in the city. I guess I was homeless or something, because I was dressed in rags and begging people for money, only to be laughed at. Eventually I stumbled into an alley and leaned up against a wall before grabbing a piece of broken glass. With one swift movement, the glass was across my wrist. I just sat there watching the blood fall before I fell to the ground. As I slowly bled to death, I whispered my final words.. "And you will be the death of me..." I guess that means I'm meant to die alone in a dark, cold alley. I'm going to see Charlie. I miss him like crazy and I just need to be near him right now...I'm on my way, my love. <3 |
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| mood: despondent |
(2) comments |
| Oh, My Love.. |
Jul 2nd, 2005 1:22:20 am - Subscribe |
| Theres something about you, something that I'll never understand. One moment its like I'm everything, then as though I'm just something to make up for empty moments in time. The way you look at me, could it possibly be, anything but love? I'd kill to see your smile for me every moment I live, but it seems the good things are impossible to have. I'm ready to pull you close, I'm ready to push you away. I'm ready to just say "Fuck everything, won't you love me always?" Charlie, I'm sorry for what I said to you. I regret the thought and for hurting you. I just wish you could see things my way..I wish you knew how truely amazing you, how you make my knees weak by giving me a simple grin, how I can never sleep at night until I take one last look at your picture and whisper, "Goodnight...". Does it really sound like I'm ready to let go and plunge into a life of cold, desparing solitude?... I'll fucking love you until the day I die.. |
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| mood: All because of you... |
(2) comments |