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| Andy's Last Words |
Jul 10th, 2005 2:49:58 am - Subscribe |
| This is Andy's cousin, I'll be posting his final words..Andy was like a brother to me, so I find this really difficult, but I want his friends to see. He passed away July 6th, due to internal bleeding...The doctors made us believe he was going to make it..Even Andy's smile had us convinced.. "I'm finding it difficult to believe this all happened..A car accident?...The last thing I remember was thinking of Charlie as I went to pick him up. Less than a mile left to reach his house...how could I not have made it? I was depressed, love-filled, so many emotions..and after that car hit mine...I felt nothing inside. To wake up and find Charlie in a bed beside me, completely unconcious...that was the most painful moment of my life. I didn't have it in me to speak, all I could do was lie there crying. My family and friends tried to explain what happened to him....I was furious, how could someone be so stupid? How could they possible make Charlie think I was dead? And then I find out who it was...My own stepfather told Charlie I was gone. He hated Charlie. He hated me. Most of all, he hated our relationship. He knew Charlie wouldn't take that news well, and he actually had the nerve to show up in our hospital room. If it weren't for the look on my mother's face, I would have made that man pay. He's lucky for my mother's love and unawareness of the situation. I'll never forgive him for hurting Charlie... I'm awaiting for Charlie to wake up. It feels like I've been waiting for an eternity, but it doesn't matter..I'll wait as long as it takes, I just want to know he's okay. Charlie is my only reason to live. Without him, I'd have taken my own life so long ago. I think I'll begin to finish this up..Its getting more difficult to continue writing. I've tried to put a smile on my face and convince everyone I'm okay. They've all had so much to worry about, I can't bare to add to that. Everyone is asking me how I feel and I have to lie every time. How can I tell them, "It hurts.", "I don't want to feel this way anymore. Just unhook the machines and let me go.", "I cry when none of you are here to see."? I can't..thats the thing. I'm going to continue to endure this though, for Charlie's sake as well as everyone else's, no matter how much its hurting me. I just need Charlie to wake up, I need to look in his eyes again and see that smile that makes all this pain worth dealing with... I think I just might make it. Everything is going to work out, and soon we'll all return to our normal lives...and I'll never take the love I've been given for granted again..." Andy did endure it for awhile longer...Only a few moments after Charlie woke up, Andy passed away. He saw that smile he wanted, but it wasn't enough to save him this time. I want to thank all of you who prayed for the health of Andy and Charlie. Although the prayers were not enough to save my cousin, I'm happy to say that Charlie is still with us today. A part of me is at rest though, because I know Andy will continue to watch us and his spirit will always live with us. |
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| mood: destroyed |
(6) comments |
| anonymous |
July 10th, 2005 |
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| I am so sad for you. | ||
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daatreyu |
July 10th, 2005 |
| I can't... I can't believe he's really gone... ~Beth~ |
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| anonymous |
July 10th, 2005 |
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| sad....you can put it into words and write the same thing but it all equils up to...sad....very sad... ;.; | ||
| anonymous |
July 10th, 2005 |
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| I have an idea of what you're going through. I'm sorry for your loss. | ||
| xmidnightx |
July 10th, 2005 |
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| oh my, that made me cry, i did not really know andy, or charlie, i just read their blogs all the time, and when andys mother announced the accident, i did my best to keep myself updated... i was sure they would pull through... i am glad that andy got to see charlie awake that one last time, im sure he will cherish that. my condolances to their family and friends, poor poor charlie god bless you all, especially andy all my love heidi |
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hushpuppy |
July 16th, 2005 |
I'm at a lost for words to say here - all I can think of at the moment is I'm in grief to know that Andy's really gone, and it make me sad very deeply. It's true I don't know both Andy and Chalie personally, but I believe he's gone to a better place called heaven and I know that he will always be in the heart of everyone who loves him - his family and friends - from now on to eternity; my condolances  |
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