spawn2u's Blog

Manic Drepression is not new to me...
Date: Nov 12th, 2005 1:13:45 am - Subscribe
Mood: A bit sad and mad
spawnliness: sorting at 50%

Things are so PC these days that the term Manic Drepression is no longer the term, its acually bi-polar. I liked Manic Depression as a descriptor better.
My father was diagnosed with manic depression, there is that great song by Jimi Hendrix "Manic depression". Oh don't forget Kurt Cobain suffered manic depression, that's what they say anyway.
So with all the possitive spin on the term mainc depression, why did it turn to bi-polar? My guess, because black people became African American, Indians became American Indians and so on. I don't have a beef with any of those changes but I do hold a personal grudge against the people who took away my clearly manic depressive father and swapped him for a bi-polar man.
Right now, unless he is dead, out there some where, my father is either up or down, he is either crawling out of his skin or wanting to die in his skin. either way I am pretty sure he is depressed or manic but I am damn possitive he is not bi-polar.

Father of mine by Everclear......

Father of mine
Tell me where have you been
You know I just closed my eyes
My whole world disappeared
Father of mine
Take me back to the day
When I was still your golden boy
Back before you went away

I remember blue skies
Walking the block
I loved it when you held me high
I loved to hear you talk
You would take me to the movie
You would take me to the beach
You would take me to a place inside
That is so hard to reach

Father of mine
Tell me where did you go
You had the world inside your hand
But you did not seem to know
Father of mine
Tell me what do you see
When you look back at your wasted life
And you don't see me

I was ten years old
Doing all that I could
It wasn't easy for me
To be a scared white boy
In a black neighborhood
Sometimes you would send me a birthday card
With a five dollar bill
I never understood you then
And I guess I never will

Daddy gave me a name
My dad he gave me a name
Then he walked away
Daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
My daddy gave me a name

Daddy gave me a name
Daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
Daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
My daddy gave me a name

Father of mine
Tell me where have you been
I just closed my eyes
And the world disappeared
Father of mine
Tell me how do you sleep
With the children you abandoned
And the wife I saw you beat

I will never be safe
I will never be sane
I will always be weird inside
I will always be lame
Now I'm a grown man
With a child of my own
And I swear I'm not going to let her know
All the pain I have known

Then he walked away
Daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
My dad gave me a name
Then he walked away
My daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
My daddy gave me a name
Then he walked away
Then he walked away
Then he walked away

spawn exit

spawn2u - November 12th, 2005 Did I tell you I met him for lunch about 7 months ago. He called my my brothers name several times and asked me about me a couple times. I tried to impress him with my GIS knowledge but he really did not care about anything but himself. Everytime it hurts just a little but it is always a pain with me...... spawn exit

__mom__ - July 27th, 2006 I know what ya mean. I myself was diagnosed with BP (sheesh) a year or so ago, after having had it for the last 35 years or so. And I just thought I was depressed. Well, so did a few other drs. Till my mom (who also suffered from clinical or maybe manic depression) died in 2004. Damn, that sent me into a tailspin, even though I knew the day was coming soon. She had been slowly killing herself with booze for years, and for the past several, was just the living dead. Anyway, what I measnt to say was, yes: as a writer/artist/human being, I too like the sound of "manic depression" better than "bipolar disorder". Damn EVERYTHING is a disorder nowadays. Manic depression describes the problem SO much better. Well, best of luck with your dad. I understand his pain. Maybe yours too...I dunno. I don't write in this blog much anymore....I spout off in a journal I've been very regular with elsewhere. It's my "blankie". But maybe I'll be in here every now and again.

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