A fresh page, a new start.
I'm gonna get phylosophical now.
Is it an easy thing to start something? I mean, gathering the strength and moving on to something new? On one hand - yes. You just throw away the old, the past, and start anew. That sounds simple. But on the other hand - how do you just throw it away? You can't forget your past. So is it easy to start something new with the memories of the past? I guess you should accept it. It is a part of who we are. So you won't throw anything away. You just put it on a shelf. You can look back at it anytime you want. You have it forever. In your memory. And a new start? We all need it sometimes. To clean our brain cells from garbage. To free ourselves. Have more options. Have more dreams. And the most important of all - enjoy ourselves!
Hehe.. That was my first entry.
I admit it. I've stole this.
But at least the answers are mine
what's your favorite color?: black
what's your favorite movie?: Gia
what's your favorite actor/actress?: Depp & Jolie
what's your favorite t.v. show?: Charmed
what's your favorite flower?: any purple flower will do
what's your favorite song?: You by Candlebox
what's your favorite band?: Nirvana
what's your favorite cartoon?: Cow & Chicken
what's your favorite animal?: pig
what's your favorite book?: The Hunger
what's your favorite eye color?: green
what's your favorite skin color?: purple with orange dots!
what's your favorite web site?: I-Am-Bored
what's your favorite word?: oi
what's your favorite drink?: beer!!
what's your favorite food?: pizza
what's your favorite resturant?: don't go to any
what's your favorite body part?: my arms
what's your favorite name for boys?: Chris
what's your favorite name for girls?: Lisa
your favorite dessert?: iScream
what's your favorite item of clothes?: my boots
what's your favorite color of shoes?: black & red
what's your favorite color for clothes?: whatever i feel like
Ahh.. I just finished a bottle of wine all by myself. I feel warm. Both on the outside and on the inside. I can actually go to sleep with a smile on my face. Someone loves me. A friend. And I just thought, during those past few days, that I don't need anyone to make me happy. That I can be on my own and be totally happy. And I can. But it's nice having someone who cares. Someone who loves. Someone who misses.
My head spins abit.
It'll pass in the morning.
My lamp broke down. So the only source of light is my computer's screen. The JOY of life.
So I had this thought..
How long can a human live without light?
Does it damages health?
It'll take me a while to fix my little light problem. It's not because I can't [if I'll try really hard I'll manage this], but because of my laziness. That + money. And I'm leaving for boring skull in a few days anyway, so why bother now? I can fix it later, when I come back.
I finished another bottle of wine today at my uncle's place.
|Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity..?|
Just talked to Eric on the phone. I got the number. He's in jail, we haven't talked for a long time. I've tried to call before, but the number was busy. It's a jail, there's lots of people who wants to use the phone.. Anywayz.. He's coming out next week. I planned with Veronica that we'll throw a surprise party for him. But.. She already told him about it! Why? Because she wasn't sure he wanted it. LOL!!! You don't ask somebody if he wants a surprise party! It won't be a surprise anymore!! Hahahaha!!!!!! And she was serious about it! Haha.. I can't believe this.. She might have also asked him when is it comfortable for him and who to invite!
So, I talked to Eric. He told me he misses me. My voice.. He told me that he's inlove with me. That I made his evening. And I'm glad I did. Though I don't feel the same way about him, he's a friend. And I care. And I want him happy. Damn, I missed him. I just realised it after I talked to him. And he's out next week. I'm gonna see him. I owe him a beer, hehe.
And don't forget that...
You are unique...
Just like everyone else...
I came back home yesterday. My room is still dark and lightless.
I went to Shakespeare with Anna. Met Eric (he was away in jail and now he's out), Veronica and Jay there. We drank a few beers, then a couple tequila's. Then more beer. We got drunk. And there was this black dude, who was telling me about his problems and stuff. Anyone needs to talk to someone sometimes and let it out. So i listened. Then he tried to hit on Anna. I think with no much luck. Jay went to fuck a girl who was there. Veronica disapeared.. Anna wanted to go home. So we went. On our way I had to pee. I didn't want to go look for a place or bushes, so i just peed in the middle of the street! Cars are passing and I don't mind. Hehe.. Then when we were under Anna's building I started to yell about something. I cursed really loudly. And then... I saw Anna's mother in the window. I froze. That wasn't a nice moment. I think I didn't even say hello.
Came back home, logged onto MSN. Then went to sleep.
I woke up at 7AM with a huge headache. That damn hangover.. I felt like smashing my head into a wall. Horrible feeling.
I cleaned the carpet and even enjoyed it! At first I wanted to throw it away, but.. The animals love it. So we're keeping it.
Why do people forget about others so quickly?
So here i am. This day was. Just was. No feelings, no nothing. Empty.
It rained though. Made me smile. Finally this heat is over.
Tomorrow will be a better day. I want to believe that.
Who can possibly judge fashion? No one! For each person there's his fashion that he likes. You can't say it's ugly just because you don't like it. Fine, you may not understand it, but don't say something that isn't objective!
Sometimes people just piss me the hell off!
I bought these really cool boots (it my opinion), but apperently they're ugly!
Well.. Not in my eyes!
There.. I let it out, now i feel better.
So here I am again. Typing into the screen, into the unknown cyberspace.
Tired, need some rest. But there is no rest for me. Like a machine, working non-stop. And it's hollow. Empty. Frozen. Can anyone let me out? Can anyone see behind the mask? Sometimes even I can't see. It's too dark inside.
I'm going crazy,
And this will never end.
I will dwell in it.
I will throw it up.
I will pick myself together
And then fall apart.
Come here, come closer,
Come see me.
Oh no, don't go near,
It won't be pretty.
All the issues, all the pain,
My word are all in vain.
So, my new project is up. I broadcast a radio. I will play all kind of music, but mostly EBM/ Industrial/ Synthpop/ Rock/ Metal/ EMO/ Indie/ Punk/ Post punk (maybe even some POP if i'll feel like it).
As you can see, a broad choice of genres.
Also, if you want to ask me to play your favorite song - go ahead!
Do so on MSN messenger -
I'd love to get your feedback!
Almost finished a book i was reading.
It looks like it's about to rain, and i can't go out and get wet. What a waist!