Dawn.
Date: May 8th, 2008 6:24:50 am - Subscribe
Mood: bewildered
Sooo. I feel as though. My depression has been kicking me in the ass for the past 3 weeks now, the usual feelings of hopelessness, self-pity, sadness, darkness, pain, cutting and suicidal thoughts.
I feel like I have tried so much and I have been through alot of pain. I don't want to die, I know that. Although at times I really do feel like ending my life and don't.
I've been through this much at more at almost 18 years old. I can get through this. I'm proud of myself for not yet giving up. Even waking up in the morning and going to school is an effort in itself.
However, If I don't strt helping myself get better now, things are going to be going downhill. I'm really grateful I reconize that.
For example, stop smoking a pack a day, get more active and walk. Walking really does help with the depression. Gets the endorphines out.
I have to take care of myself. In the end, all you have is yourslf. I must not give up, and I have to try harder. One day at a time. To get myself through this and so much more.
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