Date: Nov 1st, 2009 1:37:07 pm - Subscribe
I was Cinderella for Halloween. Before she met her fairy godmother, of course. The pink version of her dress. So, instead of losing my shoe at midnight for the prince to find me again, I just lost my dignity, and now I know...he'll never want me.
I told myself that by November 1, I would have a new project for myself to prove that I could commit to something. The best thing I came up with was a blog in which I share anecdotes and stories of my past, describing my life. Every day a new entry. 365 journals that I've remained faithful to through sickness and busy times, stress and happiness. So far, so good. The first trial was the other night in which I've been so busy this past week, it's been ridiculous. I got an entry in regardless of this. Every night this week I've updated.
Walking around the grocery store tonight, I asked the one question I'd been dreading answering:
"What do I want?"
The truth is, that I don't know what I want. Every time I think I know what I want, or get what I think I want, it turns out that either I don't actually want it, or can't have it.
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