beach tomorrow
Date: Aug 6th, 2006 12:05:32 am - Subscribe
Mood: stellar

im really excited basically.
i love the beach.
so i think it will be a ton of fun.
and perfectttttt. <3 <3

this week i work like forever and a half.
tuesday: 6 to close
wednesday: noon to 5
thursday: 6 to close
saturday: 7 to close
sunday: 5 to close

so assuming i get out at 11:15 for closing....
thats a little over twentyfive hours
mmmm. <3 that pay checkkk

i wonder what else ill do this week.
soccer starts the 14th.
so next monday. aghhhhh.
im soo excited!!!!!!!!!!!

guess who i talked to today?
julia. i know right????
i mean, its cool & its not like we are friends or anything......
but i just imed her to wish her luck with cheerleading since ive been through the wrath of carolyn moser & all
and she just let me know that she didnt hate me
so i guess thats good?
lol. w/e i doubt we will ever be friends.
but its nice not to be on bad terms with her.

alright well time to go read.
went to the library and got these books:
1. madame bovary
2. last chance saloon by marian keyes
3. secrets of the morning by v.c.andrews
4. the tragedy of miss genera flowers
5. confessions of a sociopathic socail climber by adele lang
6. drop dead gorgeous by anna cheska
7. rain by v.c. andrews (ive read it before but ya know)

alright time to go start reading then.
good night.
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Date: Aug 5th, 2006 2:52:31 pm - Subscribe
Mood: bittersweet
Music:: Recycled Air by The Postal Service

Well i am home.

Vacation with the Mullins entailed quite a few things- er, um instances:
1. i almost scalded my eye out (literally...and it hurt so fucking bad)
2. mrs. mullin had something along the lines of a heat stroke (actually happened & she was in the infirmary)
3. her brother & friend annoyed the fuck out of me
4. i was on a leash all trip, but it was pretty cool anyway.

i like sarah more now.
for some reason?

and i have made choices for this year when school starts:
1. wear as little make-up as possible because real beauty does not involve ten lbs of make up. Very little, very natural is key.
2. be nice to people for once in my life. cause in reality, even if i think someone is stupid, it is no reason not to be civil or polite. so im going to try that and be a sweetheart.
3. make the most of it. im going to do everything and try and make school better. plus then teachers will stop hating me for being a sassy little snot (but we will see if i can keep that under control, except sage, shes a fucker)
4. get the newspaper up and running. im going to start setting that shit up now. asap.
5. attempt to be friends with the girls in my grade......crazy right? well i figure you onlly go to high school once and even if i dont really like all of them or everything about them, well half the time (from what i hear) they dont even like each other. why can't i pretend too? && if all else fails, just smile
6. not be ashamed of anything. im me & im not going to try and hide it. and i think i might tutor this year for community service.
7. get back second in my class status. im in all blow off classes anyway, and fuck i cannot wait to blow maria out of hte fucking water. fuck way smarter than she can ever dream to be
8. really think about college and what i want to do with the rest of my life. im actually really torn between going into something with animals or with fashion. cause i really really LOVEEEEE both. i just cant decide.
9. make people envy me. i dont know how, but i want to....but not like im a bitch you envy but im nice or something. eh who knows.
10. party. im ready to get messed up and fucked up and just not give a damn. i cant wait.

i think i get to see amy before she goes. she says more than once, so lets see. ive seen her very minimally this summer so once would be ok, assuming she can has time between work and her boyfriend. which i think she will. her life seems to be going good though & she gets to leave for collleggeee. im jealous. sort of, but my time will come soon enough.

got to see matt today. && we are taking kate to the beach tomorrow for her birthday!!! happy birthday kate (today.)
its good seeing him as i havent seen him in two weeks.

i hate friend deprovation of any sorts.
but its amazing how much you miss someone & as time goes on you sort of forget about little bits and pieces as time goes on. quite obviously i still remembered and missed him, but it goes away a little each day. but when he came back the same its so comforting.

i think all your friends are part of your heart or body. and it feels like something is missing until they come back or until someone replaces them. think of them as shapes. and when some shapes float away others float in, like squares. and the more important people are shapes all their own, and those are the ones that really matter, and when they change or move away, another shape trys to take its spot. you are still left a little empty, cause nobody can ever be that shape again.

agh bad analogy. but it works in my head and if i draw it.

got some good books from the library today. i wanted to get the other gossip girls, but they dont have the second and the rest were checked out. sad.gif so ill just have to go to a diff lib or go buy them. hum maybe i will.

oh and crest white strips today.
that makes me really happy too.
yesss to whiter smiles.
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A Resurrection
Date: Jul 30th, 2006 10:55:58 pm - Subscribe
Mood: "Line of Best Fit" by Death Cab for Cutie

Acid Rhayne makes another come back this week. As i am on vacation with the mullins. sarah is a lovely girl i just cannot stand her father. at all.

i had a fun night.
i really like kate ryan.
one of the few girls i can talk to.
right now, pretty much the only one.
we went on a "romantic date" lol.

stopped at andres. saw laura and reb vu?
random. random. random.
i dont trust those boys though.
i like them though. well sort of cripso.
but you know the deal.

left early so i could stay with amy.
but i guess shes tired so ill just stay up by myself.

im going to cut magazines by myself then.
and drink my peach snapple and get fat.
but its ok. cause clothes can normally hide that pretty well i think.

anyway....matt comes home tomorrow.
and i miss soo jeong.
its weird how good of friends we became before she left.
and i was thinking about maddie suppa.
i like her. maybe well be better friends next year. or something maybe.

well anyway....see you laterrrr

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Losing It
Date: Jul 30th, 2006 4:14:23 pm - Subscribe
Mood: yucky
Music:: "A Lonely September" by the Plain White Ts

Oi my head hurts.
And I just ate far too much.

Intake today:
B: 3/4 cup of frosted mini wheats with blueberries and milk
L: Clementine & Yogurt
D: 5 Pieces of Shrimp and a Cheeseburger

^because of dinner i feel sick sick sick. it sucks. but my dad was on the grill and i am heartfully in love with sea food.

mmm i have to pack.
then im going to get planners
so amy and i can decorate them

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Fabulous Lives Are Only in Story Books
Date: Jul 30th, 2006 1:37:58 am - Subscribe
Mood: wasted
Music:: the district sleeps alone tonight by the postal service

Downloading some new music.
This summer is so boring.
No trips. Few Friends. Lots of work.
The highlight of my summer is work.
&& I find that to be kind of sad.
I actually really like work cause I get to talk to was mostly Tony, but hes leaving. But work will still be better than home. Which is God awful boring. really.

I need to get more friends.
And i know that is something that cannot be forced. And I know O'Hara girls/boys certainly arent on the market. Maybe teh new Villa girls. Sometimes i feel like im poison or something, the lack of friends i have.
or maybe its this negativity im displaying right now. actually this is ok cause its my journal and i dont act like this. (mostly)

anyway, the kids at work today asked me why i didnt go to wheatfield.
and i dont remember why i went to ohara.
not that i really mind it, but whatever.
i just dont remember why i would have wanted to attend. (oh wait i still dont)
but luckily soccer is starting.
but i have no motivation for anything. i should start running so im in shape. ill do that.

going on vaca with the mullins.
omfg please SHOOT ME.
it will be fun, just in a sort of organized and educational, have fun this way right now sort of way. i feel so horrible for being her friend cause im not honest with the girl....but how could i ever be? shes too, well sarah mullin. not accepting or gossiping or partying or anything that i really look for in a friend.

speaking of parties, i havent been to one this summer. oh wait i never go to parties around here, or anywhere for that matter.
but i want to go to a party, or out or something, too bad the only ones that i can attend are those of jeff (amys boyfriend.)
which i will really never go to. i feel bad saying no, but i dont like them or the attendees. ill try and be nice since these are my friend's "people" but frankly i find them quite fake & generally stupid. which i have no problem with, just not as an entire lifestyle & honestly ive not patience for general stupidity. so none of those fetes for me.

and i swear to god if chuck doesnt stop trying to be my bff ill scream. cause you know, im normally pretty decent to people, like even if i dont like you, ill be polite & listen to your problems. but i dont want to be your bff yo. though i am on the market for someone to spend time with other than my lover matthew.

but not you chuck. no not you.

anyway, im putting out a personals ad.....any girl or boy that wishes to hang out and share their inner most secrets with and have crazy times and gossip and laugh and such, please apply.

i have one thing to say about this journal, thank god almost no one i know reads it. lol.

ugh i have to get my tail moving on the school website. bah. im really not looking forward to doing that either, cause mrs. moser isnt looking for a new website really at all. ok time for sleep then. bye

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