my own epic drama; my own scripted page <bgsound src="http://www.tcnj.edu/~hamilt10/(Yellowcard)%20-%20Rough%20Draft.mp3" loop="infinite">

KILL ME
while i still believe that you were meant for me

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<333

Mar 18th, 2005 6:15:39 pm - Subscribe
what's love?

guess who i thought about...

yep


sigh
mood: lovesick
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my heart has cluttered my mind...

Mar 18th, 2005 6:09:17 pm - Subscribe
i just can't stop thinking about him.
i say this over an over again but it never leaves my mind.......i wish i could just be able to be his...and to be able to hold him.
it's driving me crazy.

i wish i could tell him how i feel.....and it would be all i dream about....for him to feel the same.
mood: undesirable
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just some rambling

Mar 16th, 2005 6:28:30 pm - Subscribe
i've realized all this past time of liking people.....i don't think i truly have liked them i've just liked the feeling about being with them.
this has to be true because why would i regret liking them later if i truly did fall in like with them?
but now i think i've found someone to truly like him for him.
the thing i like about him the most is that i'm not afraid to be hurt by him. he's a really good person, and i mean the other guys were too but.....he's one of the nicest people i know.
with him it's like i'm afraid to lose him as a friend. like my world would just be so much darker without him....as only a friend.

i'm hoping i can get myself to ask him to tolo. i'm not sure what'd he say. and i hope it wouldn't mess things up between us.
but if i ask i think i'm going to do it without my friends having knowledge of it....it'll be better that way. and then they can't bug me.


ahh well i'll finish rambling later gotta go


oh yeah i won my first match 4-3. ^_^
mark and alice want me on JV because supposingly they think i'm better and mark says the other girls kinda suck. heh

toodleoo
mood: normal
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overreacting

Mar 14th, 2005 6:21:38 pm - Subscribe
i wasn't losing him afterall.
i'm glad because i don't want this to be over.
my horoscope said i needed to help someone in order to improve my love karma.....i guess it was him i needed to help.
after i told him he was acting like he was down in the dumps he explained what was bugging him and everything seemed to be better after that. :]
he still owes me a hug. hey and i was actually going to stop asking until he did it but he told me to tell him to everyday so....whatever he wants....heh

i'm still disappointed about not making JV.
but it's okay i'll move myself up.
i was able to topspin serve yesterday ^_^
lately the man has been nice to me. hmmm

well until tomorrow
mood: ok
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yellow day [girl power!]

Mar 11th, 2005 6:29:00 pm - Subscribe
heck yess we have a pep assembly today. yellow=girls blue=boys. GIRLS ARE GUNNA BEAT THE BOYS! although it sucks we got yellow. it's so easy to wear blue. but it's funny seeing some boys wear yellow on accident.
hopefully the pep assembly will pump me up for tennis today cuz i HAVE to play a match today...yeah or else i'm doomed. i think i already am though. but you know what as long as we get a coach i'll be fine.....cuz you are allowed to move up teams.

hmm last night was really depressing. i cried a total of 3 times and the last time i cried for like an hour. half an hour with soph, and half an hour with mel.
it could be PMS i have no idea. but i just couldn't stop crying.
me and mel had a cry fest. and now i think we're okay....even though it's all me and overreacting. i feel a lot better now and she gave me a hug and said sorry. maybe this was meant to happen so we can get closer.
all i know is that i was p.o.ed at my crying self when i woke up with big puffy red eyes. ahhhhh i tried to ice them but nothing helped. luckily it's almost all gone now and no one noticed unless i told them.

hmm well i should go finish math hw.
toodles.
mood: ready
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