x_beaugly_'s Blog

Questioning Life
Date: Apr 16th, 2005 1:26:04 am - Subscribe
Mood: confused


Right now I'm very confused and I'm sitting here wondering why my life is even worth living. I haven't wanted to kill myself this much before. I've tried to kill myself before, almost succeeded too. But now, the pain is just so unbearable that the suicide attempts are getting worse. I don't even know why I'm alive right now. I should be dead, not sitting here and suffering. Why am I choosing to live this life? Because if you think about it, I am the one who chooses to live this life or not. I feel like everytime I pick up the blade, someone puts their hand on my shoulder and tells me to slowly drop it and think over what I am about to do. I don't want to live...but I don't want to die.
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Увы и хорошие �ообщени�
Date: Apr 14th, 2005 12:29:40 am - Subscribe
Mood: furieux de


Ich bin zum cemetary heute gegangen nachdem Schule, meinen Freund zu besuchen. Sie ist vor fast 2 Jahren gestorben. Ich habe sie je seit dann besucht. Ich habe einen anderen Freund, der im Krankenhaus für Versuchen ist, Selbstmord einzusetzen. Es ist FRÃ-HLICH! Dieses Mädchen, das angenommen wird, mein Freund zu sein, ist ein riesiger Esel zu mir für jetzt dang denkt logisch. Es pisst mich ab. Ich will nur ihren Esel treten. Ich hasse dumme Leute. Ach und gute Nachrichten. ..for mich sowieso. Nur hat gedacht, dass ich es teilen würde. Ich habe eine doppelte Geschlechtänderung gelandet!
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Blah.......
Date: Apr 8th, 2005 12:43:49 am - Subscribe
Mood: Pissed Off


Today has been horrible. I need some sleep. I wrote a new poem today and I drew a picture that kind of explains how I've been feeling lately. I've learned 4 new songs on the guitar and am, yet again, in the process of learning another one. I think I'm doing very good. There is a dance recital soon.
In other news...one of Michael Jackson's guards testified saying that he saw Michael molest a little boy! Hahaha...that is so funny!
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Blue Babies
Date: Apr 3rd, 2005 4:56:48 pm - Subscribe
Mood: abandoned


Today, I'm not feeling well. I mean I'm physically well, but mentally and emotionally I can tell it's going to suck big hairy monkey balls!I did hear from my 'sister' and she's alive!
In other news.....the Pope is still dead. His body is lying in Vatican's Apostolic Palace. The 'Vegetable Lady' is still dead too. Although she died many days ago.....I guess I'll stop boring you now.
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Pink Penguins
Date: Apr 3rd, 2005 1:42:25 am - Subscribe
Mood: bootylicious


Today has been realatively good. I spent most of the day listening to music, playing my guitar, writing, and drawing. It was wonderful.
In other news...Pope John Paul II died today. He was 84 years old. I know, who cares. I think that's pretty much it. At least that's important.
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