Date: Feb 18th, 2005 5:38:01 pm - Subscribe
Last night I went to a school dance because I had nothing better to do. Well, sorry, that is a lie. I would have stayed home... doing nothing, but Avala wanted me to go. So I did.
Aren't I the greatest best friend? haha
Anyways, I went, and I actually danced! It was fun. I danced like... how I used to. =P
It was funny. Some people were very shocked though. hehe. No one knew I could dance, due to the fact that I come off as.. a non dancing person? I don't know, I guess because I don't listen to "rap" and "hip Hop" and all that.... people think I don't know how to dance? Or mayve it's the fact that I am usually goofy, or withdrawn. I'm not quite sure.
Renei came up to me and said " Holy shit Sarah! You're sucha good dancer, I didnt even knew you danced at all!"
I laughed and said Avy was the good one. I hate getting complements cause I never know what to say to them. Not to mention last night, was like... so not me. If that is possable?... I mean, it was me dancing... but it wasn't something I do often, or let people see me do, because I'm just not one to.. dance. haha
Some grade 12 came up to me while I was walking out to get a pop, and grabbed my sholder turned me around, and yelled into my ear (the music was loud) "See you later babe."
I jerked away, and rubbed my sholder as if it had dirt on it and I couldn't get it off. Some guys are just so... arg.
I did have fun..... just now, I'm not enjoying the pain >.< I used muscles I haven't used in forever and a day last night lol.
I have youthgroup in an hour. I'm just gunna get dressed, and go the way I am. Haha, My hairs up with half of it falling out, and I have no make-up on. I love that I can just go looking like shit, and still have a good time. =P
well that is all.. weird entry... Well it was a weird night last night... It was like.. the old me. Was fun, but I doubt I'll ever do it again.
- Bye for now, [ Sarah ]
Date: Feb 17th, 2005 5:46:22 am - Subscribe
Its 6:41 am. Why the fuck am I updating? Pssh, No clue.
I'm really tired... and cold, even though I'm in a hufe sweater and fuzzy Pj pants.
I have to walk the dog this morning.
No one is home....
My uncle is at work, and my aunt has gone in to the Hospital =[
She has to get an odd-topsy(sp?) on her breast 'cause she may have cancer. I'm worried and sick to my stomach.
Why is it, when I worrie, or think, or just anything unpleasent is running through my head or happeneing, my tummy goes through the ringer?
I do not know....
Anyways, school bus... gotta get ready... can't miss it...
Date: Feb 13th, 2005 8:52:47 pm - Subscribe
movie watched:x:: Umm The vilage i think...
book read:x:: 4th book in a VC andrews series.. i forget the name...
time you cried:x:: Today
time you brushed your hair:x:: haha Yesterday (I didnt do anything today)
time you felt love:x:: When my aunt hugged me because i was crying today.
words said out loud:x:: Goodbye
time you were sick:x:: kinda right now *coughs*
email you wrote:x:: This morning...
magazine you read:x:: Spin
song you heard:x:: Falling out of love at the volume
cd you listened to:x:: in love and death i think...
asignment you did:x:: art summative last semester lol
time you were excited:x:: Last week.
time you laughed:x:: Sadly.. I dont know...
person you talked to:x:: Justin on msn.
play/concert you saw:x:: Greenday
person you kissed:x:: Jackie! lol on the cheek though haha (I dont swing that way lol)
person who kissed you:x:: Shaun
thing you did that you really shouldn't have:x:: Talked back to Mrs.Stanois in math
:x:have you ever:x:
done drugs:x:: Yes
had sex:x:: Nope
cried because of someone of the same sex:x:: Yeah
cried because of someone of the opposite sex:x:: yeah
kissed someone of the opposite sex:x:: Yahuh
kissed someone of the same sex:x:: Family
had a huge crush on someone:x:: Duh!
had a boyfriend:x:: Yes
how about a lover:x:: umm, isnt that the same as boyfriend... hmm..
like long surveys:x:: somtimes
like surveys at all:x:: kinda
like love:x:: Yes.. falling in love though i am scared of
eat too much:x:: haha prolly
a happy person:x:: try to be
a nice person:x:: I like to think so
happy with how you look:x:: Im content with it, but yes, i would love to change some things
do you especially like darkness:x:: Sometimes
do you go to school dances:x:: No.. but one day i will i suppose
do you like them:x:: havent been to one
what do you want to be when you grow up:x:: No clue ^.^
are vampires very dear to your heart:x:: What kinda question is that? No! they wanna bite me!
how about monkeys:x:: They are cute.
do you have pets:x:: Yes
brothers:x:: Half.. 2
are you parents together:x:: lol no
or are they divorced:x:: no
do you like someone:x:: no
do they know:x::
do they like you:x::
will you love them until your dying day:x::
does love lift you up where you belong:x:: I havent been in love yet.
would you ever kill someone for love:x:: Depends on what situation you put that in.
if you could kill one person who would it be:x:: o_O I wouldnt kill anyone!!
do you like reality tv:x:: like to make fun of it
would you buy a cd for just one song:x:: Already have!
do you have a screen name:x:: Yes
is it dumb:x:: nah
do you have friends:x:: yeah, but only a couple are dear to me
have you ever been in love:x::No
Oh wasnt that fun?.... yeah no. Iunno why i posted it even...meh
*Shrugs* No title today.
Date: Feb 13th, 2005 3:23:51 pm - Subscribe
I feel like shit.
Last night I broke up with Shaun. He saw it comming he says. I felt like shit then too.
I was about to do it, and I had to stop, and lean over the garbage pale because I really thought I was about to fucking chuck. We talked 'till sunday morning... and then he said I "Had" to go to sleep. I could hardly type, but I didn't want to leave him. He's really not one to take things like this very well. He cried for about a half hour before I came online, he says, cause he knew it was comming.
Way to make me feel like shit.
I went to bed and watched some TV. I felt horrable to be just sitting in my bed watching TV, while, no doubt, Shaun was feeling not so great.
This morning I woke up, and low and behold, I still.....felt like shit.
I slept in, so no church. I sat around, and read till noon. Then my tummy thought I should eat, and was being a real bitch about it too. So I gave in and got it some alphabits. When I was going into my room, my aunt yelled and said I should try and be social and try eating in the real world.
I ate in my room still.
I read some more, and now my book has taken yet another depressing turn, and it really dissapoints me, but at the same time I cannot put it down, due to the fact that I must know how it ends, and have become fond of the main character. He reminds me alot of the old me, the me that I think is on her way back.
At the moment, he is being acussed of "sexual Relations" with his sister, who he has taken care of since he was 5 (he is now 15) and his baby sitting kid, sammy.
It really pisses me off, cause I, as the reader, know he didn't do it, but the stupid characters in the flipping book are still convinced he did.
His dad in the book pisses me right off too. Bloody hell I'd so love to shoot him.
Enough about the book.... There will only be another one tomorrow.
My aunt got a little upset with me....
She opend my door, and was all..
"No wonder your mother yelled at you for closing yourself off to the world and reading all the time!! You didn't even come out and offer to help clean!"
For some odd reason, I just stood there... Blank, and she walked away, and then I went to the washroom, and just started crying.
I wasn't even upset. Tears just started comming down.
Now I'm okay, just tired. Weak.
Why? I don't know.
I was really stressed before, about what to do with Shaun. To the point where I woke up one night, and I was sucking my thumb.
God, I felt stupid.
I told Jack, and she found it extremely amusing. .......Personally, I think I must have something wrong with me. Who the hell wakes up sucking their thumb at the age of 15. Grade fucking 10, and I wake up with my thumb in my mouth? Yeah, can you say "Loser"?
Anyways, I've had a really blah day. I am enjoying it.
Jessica was at school on friday. I was happy to see her at school. Some teachers were like why do you have your hat on... TAKE IT OFF, and she'd have to show them her note. It was awesome that she just had to show the note, and all was well.
Friday night I got in a fight kinda thing with this guy Adam. He got me so worked up I cried. Oh and to top it off, I was on cam with Shaun so he say me start crying. I never let people see me cry! I felt like the biggest dork in the world. That could be due to the fact that I am though.... *shrugs*
I think my emotions hate me. 'Cause I'm in the past three days, I've cried more than usual. Today though, man that was just plain weird. I felt like such a little kid. That's another reason I hate crying... I feel like I'm 2 again. I really hate letting my aunt see me cry too, 'cause she always wants to hug me, and I don't like hugging her when I'm crying cause.. well that was my moms job, so yeah.
Anyways, we are ordering Teddy's ^_^
I love that resteraunt. It so kicks. Oh, and my bright eyes play list is on, so I must go crawl back into bed, and drown in some thoughts, and listen to Conor's voice.
(Yes I know, it's 4:12 pm and I'm still in bed. Big deal )
Goodbye my dear blog.
We are nowhere.. and it\'s now.
Date: Feb 12th, 2005 2:50:10 pm - Subscribe
I Fucking Love Bright Eyes!
<3 Conor Oberst <3
haha Okay, get this.... I cannot stop listeing to bright eyes. Like.. I just can't! I've always liked bright eyes, for years now. But.. now.. ah. Oh how I love Bright Eyes... Conor oberst is a flipping genious. <3
Well that is all, I shall update later.
- [ Sarah ]<3
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